Yes, we both agree that if she takes his wage every month, then he should negotiate with her, since her husband should give her money, not her son. But, he should still stop counting every cent and every now and then pay for her needs. Thats the least he could do.
If the mom should except her son not to owe her any money, it has to be the other way around aswell. Theyre family after all. This also cant be compared to a random stranger giving you 1 million.
I agree with you, that he should slowly live his own life, since he is 23, BUT he shouldnt be like "im out of the house, i dont need to take care of her anymore".
An example would be my mothers family: She immigrated to Germany in the early 90s, while her 2 siblins and mom are still in the other country. She still transfers money to her every month and says that she must visit and stay at hers every summer (vacations), because she could die any moment, leading to her regretting, and, a mother is the most important person in ones life. Of course, her siblings also take care of her.
(Btw that 40k is most likely a made up amount given the troll threads of OP)
That's kinda what I meant about details: Is it a more serious issue, such as claiming his wage, or is it actually only $10 here and there? But really now, is it fair to be certain that he's lying about the 40k based on some of his threads in the past? I looked through his threads, and for the most part they just seem like hot-topic Naruto stuff he discusses for fun. Maybe it's one way for him to relieve the stress of his life at home?
If he's a troll, then whatever. This thread won't last forever. I'm going to assume the 40k figure is legit because what else do we have to go on? I'm not going to be helping him financially, so I'm not invested in fact checking everything. This is more of a hypothetical case, eg. WHAT IF there's somebody in his position. I'll be honest and say I barely know the OP. The topic itself just interests me, and I can potentially help somebody at the same time, so it's a win-win!
I still argue that raising a child has the expectation of spending a chunk of money to ensure they grow up fairly capable, whereas a child doesn't "ask" to be born into this agreement. Some parents actually see having children as an investment and go through the years training their children so that one day, they can buy them a sweet house for retirement. There's really such a broad range of parents out there that it's hard to pinpoint all possible scenarios. What I can agree on however, is that the OP has less wiggle room to ask his mother for things the same way he did 10 years ago. She may be in a position to charge rent money (even though this can be potentially seen as a **** move). It would be amazing if they could get along, but there seems to be a lot of bad blood at the moment. If she's been the least bit supportive of her child during his lifespan, I hope she does receive some form of compensation, but alas, it'll be the OP's decision.
Yes, there are many stories, like the one you shared, that would lead children to regret not taking better care of their mom. I constantly feel the desire to help out my own mother, even though she selflessly never asks for anything in return. However... I do know of cases where a mother's death simply doesn't resonate with the children. Some even quietly confess that they felt like a burden was lifted off of them. Sometimes, the mother was very destructive with their sons and daughters. Other times, the mother was nice and nurturing, and yet the children still couldn't care less (this is what saddens me). I say let the OP build himself a stable life first, and THEN start helping out his mom. If he can invest in a future, he'll be better prepared to help her down the road when medical complications start piling up.
Personally I was born in Saudi Arabia, but live in the U.S. now. My mom's parents died when she was young, and I know she wishes that she could've gotten to know them more. My dad's father kidnapped my dad's mother at a young age and forced her into marriage. You can probably imagine what impact that could have on my dad's lifestyle. He got into a fight with his father years later and eventually moved to America for college. They've held bad blood ever since. And yet, when my grandpa died a few years ago, I could still feel that my dad regretted not being around him more despite his draining upbringing. In both cases, family played a big portion in their lives. I just don't want to assume that it's the same for everybody.
People in Saudi Arabia are more family-oriented then people in the States, from what I've seen. I think culture plays a big part into it!
*Also, I'll reply to more people later, gotta do a few things first
