Lol at the post structure, you're obviously biased towards the first.
The second is a lot worse, knowing love then losing it is far more painful than not knowing it in the first place. Assuming you are referring to Naruto and Sasuke's cases, then in case number 2, your whole family is massacred by your own brother who you love and you're forced to live those moments for days. Yea that's a lot worse.
I clearly added Early Life Steps in my text structure, probably some people (not just you) are not yet prepared enough to face an idea on it's whole structure.
What do you people know about psychology ?
Well, I'll give you into it a little.
As a little child, it affects your brain a lot if you see that you are the same age with others, but they get to be treated nicely while you receive diwcky eyes all the time from parents and slowly from kids.
This type of experience from early childhood, shapes the internal structure of the brain aggressively making a weak brain to go depressive, anti-social, killer desires, etc. The first one is by far worse because you can see happiness that other get but you start to think that you will never get such a thing. Ofc you think like that if you are alone you've got noone to add to your desire =>loneliness.
What the second scenario experiences is loss accompanied by trauma.
Why this is more acceptable ? First, the age at which it happens. Second, the feeling that you do not think, but is unconscious - you got to experience warmth and love from the lost ones. Something you will never long for because you know how it feels.
In this scenario the person is only grieving the loss. He still has someone to add to his desires. *Ah, that kid has a mom and hugs him* - *Wish my mom could hug me too right now* => he can add his mom and he knows who his mom is => despair is not active.
In the first scenario *That kid is getting a hug from his mom* - *From who can I get such hug* - *My mom.. Does she loves me ?* - *Who is she ?* - *I'm all alone and everyone hates me. It's impossible for me to ever know it* - *I have so many thoughts am I even thinking normal ? Nobody wants to tell me. Everyone is cold with me. What have I done ? Have I done something wrong. Is it because I can't get grades ?* => this person experiences denial, a train of thoughts and scenarios that have no positive ending, depression, the longing for a hug, but the the despair of realizing you don't even know if you are loved or who you can add to your desire.
Have you ever felt this ? Loving a person, but never knowing if they love you back.
First person experience from birth - loneliness, despair, emptiness, aggressive with defensive behavior from people around him combine that with being all alone.
Second person experiences from conscious age (Having already been taught how to handle some things in live and how some things should work) - Loneliness, loss, grievance, revenge, anger, appreciation and praise from the others that somehow reduces this person difficulty of handling his feelings.
First one is by far worst since he has to create his life from 0. Nothing to grab on to. Nobody to talk to, nobody to appreciate, despair of being alone and not knowing who you are and what you are, etc.
If you keep saying the second scenario is worse then you clearly can't handle somethings in life and are still under parenthood.
Wishing to experience something you never had is worse than having it but not getting it anymore.
So, from people who have expertise in psychology. Being alone from start is graded above loss of family (They are graded on ages like all life changing experiences so, they both get to be graded at the same ages - early ~ mid ~ late age and for each age being alone from start is above loss of family). Because, longing for something you will never have or can't bond your thoughts with is far worse than relaxing your brain knowing you know you got that hug even thought you will never get it. Because you got it. You know how it feels. You are not in trauma state of thinking that you will never get it and your brain stops thinking at a specific point where it just starts to handle with the mixed feelings of loss, revenge of murder etc. While in the other person the thoughts don't get to have a bus station. THey keep rolling and rolling and rolling which results in a permanent painful brain activity. (Brain activity is that thing when your brain doesn't stop thinking and it's incredibly life changing and painful if it focuses on painful things)
For example a hug from a mom.