the story continues

[SandFreak]

akin landed on a planet where people lived in small huts to survive the scorching heat she explored the area and its strange inhabitance then sometime later electro had taken over the desert but she wasn't about to let the robots hurt these innocent people so with that being said she attempted to rescue the humans who were in the process of being forced to leave their homes who was killing all that resisted him eventually destruction came to the planet and it was then that it happened the blood raised through akin's veins like a volcano about to explode she was not going to let this continue on much longer with furious strength electro was knocked backwards by maximum force from her saber she was finally fighting in her first battle of freedom and was determined to kill the robot general and once the battle had taken its toll on her she traveled deep into the desert ignoring the heat that made her wounds want to cry out in pain suddenly she saw a city appear from the desert with a light smile her body collapsed in defeat from the scorching hot sun,

another great ending if i do say so myself <3

 

[Yuka]

Your a great writer sandFreak !

 

[Unpredictable]

Good Work, I liked it

 

[Punk Hazard]

looked at it but it was too many words

 

[Hinata Hokage]

i love happy ending

 

[hyugastyle]

looked at it but it was too many words

you are just as sadistic as vegeta. great job on the small story sandfreak

 

[SandFreak]

thank You i appreciate your support

 

[Punk Hazard]

you are just as sadistic as vegeta. great job on the small story sandfreak

im sorry im as tired as an old lady that ran a marathon right after giving birth to triplet horses, so excuse me if reading is a bit much for me. good stroy, i read it

 

[Jack Spicer]

Good short story. The text is all smashed together, and not capitalized/punctuated correctly, but it's good.

 

[hyugastyle]

im sorry im as tired as an old lady that ran a marathon right after giving birth to triplet horses, so excuse me if reading is a bit much for me. good stroy, i read it

just get some rest then! great exaggerationxd

 

[Punk Hazard]

just get some rest then! great exaggerationxd

sleep is boring. i rather do the extreme shit in my dreams in real life

 

[Jewelz]

Your story inspired me to become a writer

 

[RukiaKuchiki]

It was a really Good Story

 

[Zombie]

A bit of constructive criticism. You may want to break things into paragraphs. It'll make it easier on the eyes for people to read, rather than everything being jumbled into one big paragraph.

Other than that, good job.