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UchihaBrat

UchihaBrat

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HightimesHoward said:
Hey Brat I got a really hard one for you yesterday my girlfriend said that if I wanted I could have a threesome with her and her friend but here's the hard part the girl isn't that good looking and they already think I want to do this but I don't I really don't know what to say to her and it is akward as hell..


WHAT DO I SAY NII-SAN
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First things first! It is good that you are earnest with yourself to be able to say you consider another girl not-good looking! It is easier to answer your question when your earnest!
To start with; you should just say that you don't want to do it. If this is what you really feel then I'm sure they'll listen. Then comes the hard part! This may, if you consider it carefully, only be a bluff to test you. That is, maybe they were really just more interested in your reaction? It may also be for real. Either way there will come a question from either of them: why? That is usually the hardest part because as I'm sure you realize, we would all ASSUME that the "friend" would be hurt and being the friend of your girlfriend makes it that more complicated that you fear her also being hurt on her friends part. I.e. One mostly fear the reaction of those we hold dear(if there's a possibility of it being a "bad" one); I'm sure you wouldn't have, as many others, problems with refusing a threesome were it with people you have no connection with and whom you don't think you could do it with in the first place. But as all this is assumption and not reality, we wouldn't know how any would react. The question will certainly come and I'm not going to make it easy for you, just clarify the situation. Now I must ask you a question before I continue. Why is it you don't want to do it? Please be earnest, not just with me, but most importantly with yourself(note: earnest not honest which is only a form of self deception). Brat waiting mode!
 
Howard

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UchihaBrat said:
First things first! It is good that you are earnest with yourself to be able to say you consider another girl not-good looking! It is easier to answer your question when your earnest!
To start with; you should just say that you don't want to do it. If this is what you really feel then I'm sure they'll listen. Then comes the hard part! This may, if you consider it carefully, only be a bluff to test you. That is, maybe they were really just more interested in your reaction? It may also be for real. Either way there will come a question from either of them: why? That is usually the hardest part because as I'm sure you realize, we would all ASSUME that the "friend" would be hurt and being the friend of your girlfriend makes it that more complicated that you fear her also being hurt on her friends part. I.e. One mostly fear the reaction of those we hold dear(if there's a possibility of it being a "bad" one); I'm sure you wouldn't have, as many others, problems with refusing a threesome were it with people you have no connection with and whom you don't think you could do it with in the first place. But as all this is assumption and not reality, we wouldn't know how any would react. The question will certainly come and I'm not going to make it easy for you, just clarify the situation. Now I must ask you a question before I continue. Why is it you don't want to do it? Please be earnest, not just with me, but most importantly with yourself(note: earnest not honest which is only a form of self deception). Brat waiting mode!
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Holy shit I never thought it could be a test and now I really don't know what to say, and there are a few reasons why I don't want to do it

1. My girlfriend becomes jelous easily
2. The girl she wants to be the third peson is not what I find attractive
3. I don't want to hurt my girlfriend's feelings
4. I don't want to hurt her friends feelings cause in turn I'll get bitched at by my girlfriend
5. I don't want her friend to get the wrong impression that I like like her or something

This is all a ****ed up situation bad thing is if she asked me a year ago when we first met I would of been all over the Idea but now I really don't want to loose her cause she is the first girl I said I love you too and ment it.
 
UchihaBrat

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knots23 said:
i met this girl here in NB..and i think i like her..how can i tell it to her? =)

without being ignored or "BUSTED"? T_T
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What's up nii-san? First! You think? It would be better if you knew, but if there's any uncertainty then it will only result in confusion, as to whether you rally like her or not.
I don't think this is a question of "how?" rather "I don't want to be ignored or "busted" because I fear this. I.e. How can I tell her so it will seem genuine also, how can I tell her so that she will accept my feelings and will want to give it a try?" this is where I think is were the problem lies. I think, to be certain of whether you like her or not you should spend more time with her, be it at NB or however you are doing it actually. In case you really like her, try to establish a relationship by, as I said before, spending more time with her. Why? Well if you do, you will be able to give her better reasons for saying "yes let's give it a try" as well as "no, I'm sorry. Let's be friends" or worse "don't talk to me again..". Now, why would you ever want to give her good reasons for a rejection and what does it mean? Simple! The more time you spend trying to establish a relationship(even if it is just that of a fellow member or friend) the more certain she will be of her own feelings, this'll lead to less confusion. Now when the time comes and you're certain you can say you like her you simply say it. Don't hold yourself back because you fear her rejection, it will only lead to greater confusion and struggle should you be haunted by the fear of being rejected, it will definitely wither away your resolve oftelking her your feelings. In best of cases you can always try again, that is if your feelings are strong and you want to be with her. Otherwise you should realize it us a lost case. I hope this will help you! Also I'm not going to come up with a way of saying that you like someone. That you'll be able to do without any problems if you like her.
 
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HightimesHoward said:
Holy shit I never thought it could be a test and now I really don't know what to say, and there are a few reasons why I don't want to do it

1. My girlfriend becomes jelous easily
2. The girl she wants to be the third peson is not what I find attractive
3. I don't want to hurt my girlfriend's feelings
4. I don't want to hurt her friends feelings cause in turn I'll get bitched at by my girlfriend
5. I don't want her friend to get the wrong impression that I like like her or something

This is all a ****ed up situation bad thing is if she asked me a year ago when we first met I would of been all over the Idea but now I really don't want to loose her cause she is the first girl I said I love you too and ment it.
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It is so easy for an outsider to tell you what to do "do this, do that" and often they suggest things which they would have difficulty doing themselves. I'm not going to say this will be easy for you, it wont. But when it comes to your feelings you must be earnest and know what is what. If this is what you really feel about your gf and her friend and about the threesome, you simply say so. If you know you love her and want her only, then you say this and her friend won't misunderstand. If her friend hears this she will not delude herself to think that you like her. Also about hurting her friends feelings, this shouldn't be a problem if you explain that you're not up for it because you'd rather only be with your girlfriend, consider this; you said they already think it's going to happen, correct? But as it was suggested by them and not you, there shouldn't really be any problems calling it of.
Also I wonder, they may ask for reasons while suggesting an answer such as "you don't want to do it because she sisn't attractive??" This they may do if her friend thinks so herself and is aware of it. Otherwise, if you are true to your feelings then indetermination and indecisiveness will be blown away and there will be no problem explaining to them.
 
Howard

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UchihaBrat said:
It is so easy for an outsider to tell you what to do "do this, do that" and often they suggest things which they would have difficulty doing themselves. I'm not going to say this will be easy for you, it wont. But when it comes to your feelings you must be earnest and know what is what. If this is what you really feel about your gf and her friend and about the threesome, you simply say so. If you know you love her and want her only, then you say this and her friend won't misunderstand. If her friend hears this she will not delude herself to think that you like her. Also about hurting her friends feelings, this shouldn't be a problem if you explain that you're not up for it because you'd rather only be with your girlfriend, consider this; you said they already think it's going to happen, correct? But as it was suggested by them and not you, there shouldn't really be any problems calling it of.
Also I wonder, they may ask for reasons while suggesting an answer such as "you don't want to do it because she sisn't attractive??" This they may do if her friend thinks so herself and is aware of it. Otherwise, if you are true to your feelings then indetermination and indecisiveness will be blown away and there will be no problem explaining to them.
Click to expand...

I stil don't know what to say..... She texted me and said that her friend is having second thoughts so I think I'm gonna say that if she doesn't want to do it it's fine with me and I hope that works....
 
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This brat shall be present for only a short while today! So have you got some trouble related to love do not hesitate to ask! Brat adjustment!
 
UchihaBrat

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HightimesHoward said:
I stil don't know what to say..... She texted me and said that her friend is having second thoughts so I think I'm gonna say that if she doesn't want to do it it's fine with me and I hope that works....
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I'm pretty sure that won't do! If you say it like that then you're giving her an opening to change her mind! Say you really didn't want to do it either but haven't had any courage to say so because it seemed determined already. Indecisiveness like this could lead your gf to doubt that you only want her!! It is not wrong since this is what you want, no?
 
kenpachi zaraki

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UchihaBrat said:
I'm pretty sure that won't do! If you say it like that then you're giving her an opening to change her mind! Say you really didn't want to do it either but haven't had any courage to say so because it seemed determined already. Indecisiveness like this could lead your gf to doubt that you only want her!! It is not wrong since this is what you want, no?
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I think nii-san is right...
I should have told her I only love her, and don't want someone in between
or something like that >.<
 
UchihaBrat

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kenpachi zaraki said:
I think nii-san is right...
I should have told her I only love her, and don't want someone in between
or something like that >.<
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I'm a brat... I don't deserve such suffixes. At least write "brat" instead of "nii" it seems unnatural otherwise.
 
UchihaBrat

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Note: You may have noticed how I have discussed love related trouble with some people and you may judge yourself whether I'm any help at all or not but don't be afraid of posting your requests! Even if it is trolling such as that which ekettune earlier did! This brat helps all!
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UchihaBrat said:
What's up nii-san? First! You think? It would be better if you knew, but if there's any uncertainty then it will only result in confusion, as to whether you rally like her or not.
I don't think this is a question of "how?" rather "I don't want to be ignored or "busted" because I fear this. I.e. How can I tell her so it will seem genuine also, how can I tell her so that she will accept my feelings and will want to give it a try?" this is where I think is were the problem lies. I think, to be certain of whether you like her or not you should spend more time with her, be it at NB or however you are doing it actually. In case you really like her, try to establish a relationship by, as I said before, spending more time with her. Why? Well if you do, you will be able to give her better reasons for saying "yes let's give it a try" as well as "no, I'm sorry. Let's be friends" or worse "don't talk to me again..". Now, why would you ever want to give her good reasons for a rejection and what does it mean? Simple! The more time you spend trying to establish a relationship(even if it is just that of a fellow member or friend) the more certain she will be of her own feelings, this'll lead to less confusion. Now when the time comes and you're certain you can say you like her you simply say it. Don't hold yourself back because you fear her rejection, it will only lead to greater confusion and struggle should you be haunted by the fear of being rejected, it will definitely wither away your resolve oftelking her your feelings. In best of cases you can always try again, that is if your feelings are strong and you want to be with her. Otherwise you should realize it us a lost case. I hope this will help you! Also I'm not going to come up with a way of saying that you like someone. That you'll be able to do without any problems if you like her.
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thanks brat sama =)
 
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