[Discussion] The Friendzone: Different POV

[TemplarKnight]

The misconception is that men just want *** in return, and that they're only nice because of an ulterior motive. People are nice to people they like, it doesn't mean there is some nasty ulterior motive and once they achieve their goal, the niceties end.

One equivalent to this is when a really handsome guy is being crushed on by a girl who's "creepy" and doesn't have good looks and everyone is telling him that he should like her despite not having any redeeming physical traits. When a man is in the "friend-zone", he must suck it up regardless of any redeeming personality traits and realize she's not interested. When a woman crushes on a man and she's not "good enough" for him, people pressure him into finding redeeming traits about her outside of her looks and reprimand his shallowness.

The problem with the friend-zone is the conceited behavior of the female, believing she deserves the niceties that come with this particular man but because he isn't handsome, charming, or romantic, he's kept in her deck of cards for a later moment but is being used as a tool for her happiness. Men on average are more likely to fall for a woman who does favors than a woman is for a man that does favors. For some reason, when men think they deserve something it's creepy but when women think they deserve something it's called chivalry.

 

[Atrocitus]

You want to know what it is?

For decades now we guys have been raised to "treat her right" and that girls want "nice" guys when it comes to dating/***. We've been taught that a girl wants a prince charming, someone who will sweep her off her feet, do anything for her, and by doing that she will fall in love with him as well. The problem is that anyone who has experience in the dating world knows that being "nice" gets you in a friendship only, because being a nice person is expected in a normal society. Any normal human being can be nice to you any given day. That's why girls respond more to being ignored because they have so much attention when it comes to guys that anyone who doesn't give them that expected attention is interesting to them. I think it's a big shock when guys reach the age where they start going after girls, because this Prince Charming narrative they have been fed their entire childhood hasn't prepared them for the real world at all. That's why it's usually the socially awkward guys who are the so called "nice" guys.

Another reason for this is the narrative that "looks don't matter", that if the person is fat or ugly that it shouldn't affect your decisions when dating. This is obviously false as it's human nature as well as just plain biology for a person to be attracted to looks first. The problem is that some guys believe this and also believe that it should be the same for them as well and then get angry when the girl doesn't reciprocate. But can you see where he's coming from? He shouldn't get mad at the girl, he should get mad at society, because they have propagated this stupid story that everyone is a special snowflake. That because we are ourselves that we should deserve what ever we desire, not because we work for it, but because we want it.

Also plenty of girls milk these "nice" guys and take advantage of them so don't complain about them if you can't be a decent person and politely reject them.

 

[TemplarKnight]

If men think they deserve a relationship or attention in return from a woman that he sacrifices and does things for, how is it not arrogant for a woman to expect chivalry from a man she isn't related to or in a relationship with?

Women say one thing and do another. Say they want nice guys but chase the opposite because the opposite seems far more interesting to them which is what men need to learn when they're young.

 

[ChicagoJhawk]

Isn't that what friends Are for

 

[HashiraMadara]

HashiramadaraXpumpkinninja confirmed

But he's muh kid, how can I date him

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[Sagebee]

But he's muh kid, how can I date him

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Oh my mistake:lol

 

[Vulpini]

Lol, the friend zone is a real as the twilight zone.

Well, I can't agree with that since I've intentionally put few people there.

 

[Pumpkin Ninja]

Oh I so wanna f#ck and date someone like you but not you(maybe better looking)

I only like qt girls, sorry Hashi, but we can be friends.

HashiramadaraXpumpkinninja confirmed

No.

But he's muh kid, how can I date him

You must be registered for see images

Son, if you don't stfu and go to bed on a school day like you should, I'mma get the belt.

 

[Punk Hazard]

The misconception is that men just want *** in return, and that they're only nice because of an ulterior motive. People are nice to people they like, it doesn't mean there is some nasty ulterior motive and once they achieve their goal, the niceties end.

One equivalent to this is when a really handsome guy is being crushed on by a girl who's "creepy" and doesn't have good looks and everyone is telling him that he should like her despite not having any redeeming physical traits. When a man is in the "friend-zone", he must suck it up regardless of any redeeming personality traits and realize she's not interested. When a woman crushes on a man and she's not "good enough" for him, people pressure him into finding redeeming traits about her outside of her looks and reprimand his shallowness.

The problem with the friend-zone is the conceited behavior of the female, believing she deserves the niceties that come with this particular man but because he isn't handsome, charming, or romantic, he's kept in her deck of cards for a later moment but is being used as a tool for her happiness. Men on average are more likely to fall for a woman who does favors than a woman is for a man that does favors. For some reason, when men think they deserve something it's creepy but when women think they deserve something it's called chivalry.

r/niceguys or r/incels?

 

[FemmeFatale]

Interesting point of view on this friend zone, I still think it's something the man made to oppress women and make women feel guilty for actually having a choice in who to like now that we are allowed to show our ankles

 

[Punk Hazard]

Interesting point of view on this friend zone, I still think it's something the man made to oppress women and make women feel guilty for actually having a choice in who to like now that we are allowed to show our ankles

The friend zone is what happens when one person likes a person romantically/sexually, and the others is strictly friendly/platonic. So in that sense, it does exist.

It's only this terrible thing for immature people.

 

[FemmeFatale]

The friend zone is what happens when one person likes a person romantically/sexually, and the others is strictly friendly/platonic. So in that sense, it does exist.

It's only this terrible thing for immature people.

So it brings a new meaning to "no good deed goes unpunished "

 

[TemplarKnight]

The friendzone is specifically a zone in which a man is being used because he does things for a woman but won't ever be courted.