[Adventure] Over in a Flash of Red Chapter 6

FaHaD 5212

Active member
Regular
Joined
Jan 8, 2013
Messages
1,365
Kin
0💸
Kumi
0💴
Trait Points
0⚔️






Chapter 6: Sowing the Seeds to Hell

Yo Minna-san, how are you? After this, re-posting is officially complete. I'm quite satisfied with how this turned out; I mean I fixed this and the story's length increased by roughly a chapter. Also, if you want to know what some things look like in the story, check the reference pictures through the links on my profile.

"Just try to touch me" - Human Speech
'Honestly, they're so weak' - Human Thought
"This is what all you humans are" - Biju Speech
'Other than being meat bags' - Biju Thought

Mokuton Hijutsu: Jukai Kōtan (Wood Release Secret Technique: Nativity of a World of Trees) - Jutsu

Quote of the Day:
People live their lives bound by what they accept as correct and true. That's how they define "reality". But what does it mean to be "correct" or "true"? Merely vague concepts... Their "reality" may all be a mirage. Can we consider them to simply be living in their own world, shaped by their beliefs? ~Uchiha Itachi

Disclaimer: I FaHaD 5212 do not own Naruto in any way. (Would I be writing a Fanfiction if I did?)

Chapter 6: Sowing the Seeds of Hell

Unknown Underground Location


The room was not all that special. There were no decorations or any notable features other than the essential furniture. The door was a standard Japanese sliding door and the walls were a dull purple, made of stone.

We can see a man sitting in a room with three other people with animal masks. Normally they would be considered Konoha Anbu, however the multicolor property of the markings instead of the regular red suggested otherwise.

The masked people were peculiar as is but what was even more eye catching was the man sitting on a chair. He had a cross mark on his chin, obviously a war scar. His eye, rather the one visible eye, was small and squinted and wrinkles adorned his old face. Bandages covered his right eye. His arm was tied up by a bandage and seemed unusable; he had a wooden cane on by him. He wore a white shirt and a black robe, which covered his bandaged arm.

All in all, he looked to be a crippled old man who had faced the horrors of war. However the strange scene entailed the old man, who seemingly had little to no authority, ordering the youngsters on what to do.

"I have heard reports that the Jinchuriki has the Sharingan and evidence suggesting that he has the Mokuton. I want you to tail him and verify this" said the old man.

"Hai, Danzo-sama" replied the three people.

'Root really is a masterpiece, order them to do something and they'll follow it to the letter. They even killed that Uchiha couple who were about to rat me out, but that is to be expected' thought the newly identified Danzo about his personal army.

"Be warned, Uchiha Shisui is commonly seen around the boy. You are not to let him know of your presence, I'd rather not have that monkey of a Hokage ruin my plans" added Danzo as the troops left.

"I need that Jinchuriki loyal to Konoha or else he will prove to be a threat very difficult to eliminate, and not just because of Hiruzen's protection" said Danzo aloud to himself.

=====OFR=====
Two Months after Naruto's Basic Kenjutsu Began - Training Ground 4 - Konoha


*Clang* *Clang* the sound of metal hitting metal could be heard resounding in the ground.

In the center of the ground, Uchiha Shisui and Uchiha Naruto could be seen clashing their blades against each other. Naruto had several cuts and bruises all around him even though a lot of them had managed to heal; Shisui on the other hand was in perfect condition, a few specs of dust here and there but other than that, no considerable damage.

"Good job Naruto, you almost managed to nick me there. You're just not fast enough to beat me, you could give any Chunin a run for their money in the Kenjutsu department and manage to come out on top, unbelievably excellent considering that you're only about seven and a half years old. Congratulations" complimented Shisui.

Collapsing to the ground, finally feeling tired, Naruto replied, "I suppose so" accepting his weakness compared to the world.

In the two months Naruto had managed to get a perfect form for his Taijutsu Style and got the concept of Kenjutsu, all he needed was some experience with a sword.

"Let's see, you have more than enough Ninjutsu skills for your age since your body can't handle strain greater than that of B-rank Jutsu. You know some A-rank Jutsu for emergency situations and have Chunin level speed without the weight seals. Your Taijutsu and Kenjutsu can only be improved with experience. You have a decent set of Genjutsu, up to A-rank with the Sharingan and B-rank without it. You have a general idea of using different types of weapons and have almost perfect accuracy with projectiles. I suppose all you can do to improve is use weight seals for physical training and practice the rest. You're no master but you can manage to understand a considerable amount of the intermediate seals, as expected of an Uzumaki. And I suppose you can call yourself a strategist, after all you now fully utilize your considerably high IQ while forming battle plans and strategies for most tasks. I guess it's time to get started on your Mokuton" judged Shisui.

"You always peg me up an extra level or two. While I agree that I can beat the Academy Chunin but the more active ones, I'm not too sure" admitted Naruto.

"It's a good thing that you're not arrogant like the other Uchiha" said a proud Shisui who thought, 'I'm sure he'll be the one to overcome the Uchiha's curse of hatred, actually thinking twice, there isn't much holding back the curse from affecting him except luck' not knowing whether or not the boy's entire life might be affected by the curse.

"So, what're we gonna do about my Mokuton?" asked Naruto.

"From what I know, the Mokuton is basically a mixture of the Water and Earth Style. There's actually a Mokuton user in the Anbu, but he just doesn't seem to have whatever it was that made the Shodaime a legend. I believe that you will be the one who will surpass Senju Hashirama" said a confident Shisui.

"Water and Earth eh. I suppose I'll check the mixture I find most natural" figured Naruto.

=====OFR=====
Time Skip - Next Day - Uzumaki Estate - Konoha


Naruto and Shisui had spent the whole day on trying to figure out the strongest possible combination of the elements. Naruto first made a wooden pillar, Shisui then used an A-rank fire Jutsu to test it. When the most fire-proof combination had been found, Shisui had Naruto made more pillars and tried to burn them and if they could remain standing, cut them in half with his Katana.

After a long process of trial-and-error, they managed to find a combination which was both fire-proof, not that it couldn't be burnt but it took a long time and only slightly faster results with a strong or multiple fire Jutsu. Other than that Shisui managed to judge the combinations until Naruto managed to make a pillar that he found difficult to cut. He then had his student practice making a few more pillars, which were all tested.

Naruto being as unpredictable as he was managed to use up almost all of his Chakra reserves to use Mokuton Hijutsu: Jukai Kōtan (Wood Release Secret Technique: Nativity of a World of Trees), although not anywhere near the scale nor quality of the Shodaime according to the Sandaime, but nevertheless this was an achievement of a seven, borderline eight, year old and he should be proud of it. After the event had transpired, Naruto was barely conscious and had to rest as he used up a major portion of his reserves, although less would have been used if he knew the hand signs.

The blond had to rest the whole day and since no one could enter his house except his friend Nana and Mikoto, Nana was sent to care for him. Naruto had known enough about seals to know where the main seal of the barrier was located and somehow, in a way even he didn't understand, Naruto added Nana's and Mikoto's Chakra to the seal's recognition systems. Probably had something to do with the Uzumaki's natural affinity to seals.

Currently our hero was stirring back to the real world. Everything was still groggy but Naruto could distinctively feel a weight on his chest. Regaining his bearings, Naruto was truly happy at what he saw.

'She must have stayed the whole night to watch over me after we came home' thought Naruto on seeing Nana sleeping cutely and peacefully on his chest.

Letting the girl rest, he drifted into his own thoughts. 'I'm sure I felt a few presences the moment I used that Mokuton Jutsu. Probably must be me being paranoid but to be safe I'll keep my sensory abilities sharp and watch my back. Honestly, this is supposed to be my home but other than the Uchiha, the villagers and this new group, probably belonging to Konoha, why do they all have to treat me as something inhuman. If things keep on going at this rate, I'll have to leave Konoha as a whole. It won't be a matter of trust it or not as my parents say. And I always have this distinct feeling that everything bad that happens to me and my previous people is directly related to Konoha, how can anyone be such a cause for concern.'

Ending his thoughts, Naruto saw his pseudo-girlfriend, and soon expected to be one, wake up with a rather cute yawn. Looking at Naruto, she bonked him on the head and said, "BAKA, why don't you be more careful? You're going to kill me with all the worry you cause in me."

Jovial at the prospect of having someone to care for him, Naruto tactfully decided to lighten the mood, "Hai Nana-sama, I'll be careful from now on. Forgive me your Highness."

"Not good enough" retorted Nana.

"Come on, is anything enough to satisfy you?" questioned Naruto in a mock irritated tone.

"Oh, I don't know about that" said Nana, her hands rubbing Naruto's rather muscular chest, her eyes having a certain glint to them.

"We're too young for that you pervert" retorted Naruto.

"You're no fun, at least learn to play along" pouted Nana.

"All in due time, kukukuku" chuckled Naruto darkly and maneuvered the girl and had her sitting on his lap, his hands tracing circles on her clothed abdomen.

As if on cue, Mikoto walked in to check on Naruto, but upon looking at the scene said, "Practicing for the future are we? I suppose I can leave you to your 'work' since Naru-kun seems to be fine" and pretended to leave.

"IT'S NOT LIKE THAT KAA-CHAN" retorted the two jumping on either side of the bed.

"Hehe, you're both so fun to tease" joked a giggling Mikoto at which the children pouted, which in turn made Mikoto squeal, 'Kawaii'.

"Now let's ignore immature adults and get breakfast ready" said Naruto in a mock serious tone at which the Uchiha Matriarch magically got a twig in her hand and dejectedly started to trace circles on the floor.

In about ten minutes the three people cooked up a breakfast of pancakes and honey. The time eating was fairly quiet with the occasional giggle between the two children who had an evil glint in their eyes which unnerved Mikoto.

After the meal was finished, the children suddenly rushed to the bedroom which made the remaining Uchiha curious. Finding no harm in following them, she went for the room.

Upon taking a step in the room, she was faced with a bombardment of pillows. But instead of falling back, she was tackled onto the bed where our favorite two little devils jump to either side of the woman and drew their hands closer to her.

Upon seeing the malicious grins adorning their adorable faces, the Uchiha nervously said, "Hey guys, I was just joking back THEN HEHEHE, OOOH HAHAHAHA, COME ON, STOOOP IIIIITT! HAHAHAHA."

Ignoring her pleas, the cute little demons continued their merciless onslaught at their quest to tickle her to unconsciousness.

"Sorry Kaa-chan, but this is for your own good. We always have to teach you a lesson on teasing us as payback" said the two in unison.

Back to Mikoto, she was a mess. The two had so much energy that they continued to tickle her for an eternity until she finally reached her blissful release that was her unconsciousness. The two kids got tired as well and straightened her up and slept along either side of her.

=====OFR=====
Time Skip - Three Hours


Drifting back into reality, Mikoto felt that the sleep she had was the most enjoyable one of her life and the one for which she was the most thankful.

Trying to get up she felt her arms bound by something, 'Don't tell me they bound me to the bed'. However looking at her sides, she found Naruto and Nana holding her arms, cuddling with them with a cute expression on their faces which brought a smile to her own.

As soon as she was done admiring their cuteness, they both got up on synch and yawned, making for an adorable scene.

The two kids were in the process of straightening themselves up when they heard a sound. *Clink* Mikoto got a camera out of thin air and got a picture which the two would later find a copy of in their respective rooms. Luckily for Mikoto, she managed to hide the camera before it was seen. In another stroke of luck, the kids figured that it was just paranoia.

Hitting him like a ton of bricks, the blond remembered his training and in five minutes got ready and was about to leave.

However he was stopped by Mikoto, "Shisui said that you will take a break today Naruto-kun".

"No No… But I have to… Yes... No… Yes… That's perfect" said an eccentric Naruto at which the two females thought that he had lost it.

"You Two. Follow. Now" said the only male in the room in a rush, confusing the girls. Not waiting for a reply, Naruto grabbed their wrists and dragged them off their feet.

=====OFR=====
Root Headquarters - Konoha


"Report" demanded Danzo.

"Hai, Danzo-sama. The Jinchuriki is quite strong and has ties inside the Uchiha Clan. His mother figure is the clan matriarch and his best friend is the daughter of the shinobi you had killed. He can use the Mokuton and has the Sharingan, in fact if we were even ten feet closer to his Mokuton Jutsu, we would have been killed." replied the Ne (Foundation) troop.

At this, the usually stoic Danzo's eyes widened noticeably and he said, "I see, you may go now" at which the emotionless puppets left.

"Hmm, that boy. As things are right now, I am unable to take him. He is well guarded, Shisui as a teacher, Sarutobi's constantly watching eyes, the Uchiha's back up while strolling the village and his parents accursed seals protecting him at home. I suppose I'll have to get closer to him and deceive him into joining me, I can use that Nana girl as blackmail" said Danzo to no one in particular.

=====OFR=====
Uzumaki Training Ground - Konoha


"Now then Kaa-chan, Nana-chan, since Shisu-sensei isn't training me, me and Nana are going to train under Mrs. 'Most Efficient Sharingan User'. You had better not pull any punches Kaa-chan, I'm quite strong" said an over enthusiastic Naruto.

"Wait a second, I'm sure Nana-chan doesn't want to do any training" stalled Mikoto.

"Actually, I wouldn't mind having practice with my Sharingan" replied Nana.

"Kukuku, don't say I didn't warn you" said Mikoto darkly, creeping the children a little at the sudden change in the woman's demeanor.

Getting over the sense of dread Naruto said, "That's what Sensei always says. Bring it". Getting into a temporary Taijutsu stance 'I'll surprise her later' "Let's go Nana."

"Hai, here we come, Kaa-chan" said Nana as the two young Sharingan users charged at the experienced user.

However they suddenly stopped, surprising Mikoto, "Nana hasn't received any training, has she? I suppose we will have to postpone this match. I'll go do some Chakra exercises and Fuinjutsu Training. Nana, you train with Kaa-chan we'll have a match in a few months" said Naruto.

"Hey, I was just about to have fun" pouted Nana.

"Now Now Nana-chan, let's go do some practice in the Uchiha Training Ground made especially for Sharingan training. Naru-baka won't know what hit him when were done" said Mikoto.

"I'll be able to take you both on by then" boasted Naruto.

However Mikoto suddenly dismantled into a flock of crows and moved behind Naruto and bonked him on the head from. "Getting arrogant are we?" teased Mikoto.

"Oww. Isn't that Itachi-nii's Jutsu?" retorted Naruto.

"Who do you think taught him that?" said Mikoto and took Nana away with her in a Shunshin.

"Boy do I have to work hard if Kaa-chan is training Nana" said Naruto as he made fifty clones. Half went to do Chakra Control and the other to Fuinjutsu. He himself began physical training, thinking of having Shisui make him do more than just Mokuton training.

=====OFR=====
Next Day - Training Ground 4


Both Naruto and Shisui appeared quite early in the morning, as usual. They both sat on the benches which Naruto made on day one and remained silent, that is until Naruto yawned.

"I see you're all rested up and better than ever" said Shisui.

"Sensei" requested Naruto, "I want to do more than Mokuton right now. I think that I have recovered enough to handle the mental stress of a hundred and fifty clones, probably two hundred but less is safer. I'll send twenty-five each for Fuinjutsu and Chakra Control. I want to learn more advanced things with the remaining hundred, Mokuton included."

"What got you all motivated? Is it your girlfriend?" joked Shisui bit one look at Naruto and he said, "Don't tell me I'm right. Oh man are you progressing quickly, her dictating you and all."

"It's not like that, baka-sensei. Me and Nana will have a match and I might have challenged Mikoto-Kaa" he said the last part rather sheepishly.

"Now that was foolish, challenging one of Konoha's Shi Shisutāzu (Death Sisters). Your mother, Aka Shi (Red Death) and your godmother, Kurai Shi (Dark Death). You had better work hard then" replied Shisui, "Now then, send about fifty clones for Mokuton training. The rest of the clones will master all that you already know, actually leave twenty-five for some special things I want to teach you, such as my Bureizubureido (Blaze Blade) Kenjutsu Style, its theory may actually be of use to you. You yourself will do your regular physical training at five times the amount of weight you're used to, I'll have spars with you from time to time, weights on, both Kenjutsu and Taijutsu."

Tapping Naruto's weight seals, Shisui greatly increased the force applied on Naruto's body at which said boy fell to the ground. "Damn this is rough. This had better be worth it, I want to have more progress than ever by the end of these ten months" said Naruto amidst a barrage of curses.

Thus forth, Uzumaki Uchiha Naruto began his final few months of training under his Sensei.

That's it for now.

Things are finally getting into motion now. Now I know that this chapter seemed too bright and cheery for its name but things did happen. *cough*Danzo*cough* and damn Danzo is tough to write, I actually think that I went a bit off character.

Ja Ne

Read & Review.


 
Last edited by a moderator:
  • Like
Reactions: Awkward Linguist

Avonomemi

Active member
Elite
Joined
Feb 6, 2012
Messages
6,404
Kin
1,632💸
Kumi
6,119💴
Trait Points
0⚔️
You did well with the chapter
My concern is on the training, too much info in there, we don't exactly need it, it isn't like we studying for exams lol (that's my Opinion mind you)
And Am liking mikoto ever more lol
 

FaHaD 5212

Active member
Regular
Joined
Jan 8, 2013
Messages
1,365
Kin
0💸
Kumi
0💴
Trait Points
0⚔️
You did well with the chapter
My concern is on the training, too much info in there, we don't exactly need it, it isn't like we studying for exams lol (that's my Opinion mind you)
And Am liking mikoto ever more lol
Thanks.

Well I figured that this way would be better as it looked like Shisui was reminiscing all of Naruto's progress, summarizing his work so a future plan can be made. If that didn't look too good then I'll just capitalize on it and make such a scene more interesting in the future.

I'll make sure that everyone likes Mikoto, I have a surprise in store for the future (though I'm not sure if everyone will like it).
 

Michael92

Legendary
Joined
Dec 3, 2009
Messages
12,929
Kin
13,586💸
Kumi
74,447💴
Trait Points
0⚔️
Finally got to read it.
This chapter got me surprised xD At times it seems like you are writing the start of a children *** scene, and then Mikoto comes in and gets "tickled unconscious" XD

This story is so damn weird some times bro, but it's alright because it's a much needed comedic break from my dead-serious story. I have a feeling you will be moving further away from the "daily life in Konoha" starting next time, like you said. My bet is that the massacre will happen (or parts of it), Mikoto will die, a (civil)war will break out and a skip will happen. Nana will survive though, that's all I can bet into right now, haha. Will be seeing you in a few months then. Like you know, I've decided to take a month's break too so we'll see what will happen then ;)
 

FaHaD 5212

Active member
Regular
Joined
Jan 8, 2013
Messages
1,365
Kin
0💸
Kumi
0💴
Trait Points
0⚔️
Finally got to read it.
This chapter got me surprised xD At times it seems like you are writing the start of a children *** scene, and then Mikoto comes in and gets "tickled unconscious" XD

This story is so damn weird some times bro, but it's alright because it's a much needed comedic break from my dead-serious story. I have a feeling you will be moving further away from the "daily life in Konoha" starting next time, like you said. My bet is that the massacre will happen (or parts of it), Mikoto will die, a (civil)war will break out and a skip will happen. Nana will survive though, that's all I can bet into right now, haha. Will be seeing you in a few months then. Like you know, I've decided to take a month's break too so we'll see what will happen then ;)
Well, I'm not gonna deny that. This time it was intentional XD.

I'm going to take the story to an angst, pain route after my break, not to say that there won't be a gradual development.

You might be on to something there, but in the end only time will tell. Nana will survive regardless.
 

Michael92

Legendary
Joined
Dec 3, 2009
Messages
12,929
Kin
13,586💸
Kumi
74,447💴
Trait Points
0⚔️
Well, I'm not gonna deny that. This time it was intentional XD.

I'm going to take the story to an angst, pain route after my break, not to say that there won't be a gradual development.

You might be on to something there, but in the end only time will tell. Nana will survive regardless.
Cool =p I'll be looking forward to it then. Guess that means we have at least a month to make our 6th chapters the most replied to yet? :rolleyes: JK, I know we both have stuff to do so xD
 

FaHaD 5212

Active member
Regular
Joined
Jan 8, 2013
Messages
1,365
Kin
0💸
Kumi
0💴
Trait Points
0⚔️
You had better do so. Right now I'm having crazy ideas but am unable to wrote then in an organised manner. Didn't get what you meant, I know it was meant to be a joke, I even know how. However considering your personality, I didn't think you capable of jokes (no offence).
 

Michael92

Legendary
Joined
Dec 3, 2009
Messages
12,929
Kin
13,586💸
Kumi
74,447💴
Trait Points
0⚔️
You had better do so. Right now I'm having crazy ideas but am unable to wrote then in an organised manner. Didn't get what you meant, I know it was meant to be a joke, I even know how. However considering your personality, I didn't think you capable of jokes (no offence).
LMFAO! I joke around all the time bro! Even to the extend that Netsui gets tired of it XD
And I get what you mean. I too have a crazy idea for the next one, haha.
 

Trea

Active member
Regular
Joined
Apr 12, 2013
Messages
713
Kin
0💸
Kumi
0💴
Trait Points
0⚔️
Awards
It seems as though your writing is improving with each chapter. I like that you're fleshing out Mikoto in this because we never saw much of her in canon. This chapter seems a little short on action though, too much training and too much of a pillow fight. I am still intrigued with you story so I'll keep reading. I just wish I could get used to a genius Naruto but I guess that's what intrigues me.
 

FaHaD 5212

Active member
Regular
Joined
Jan 8, 2013
Messages
1,365
Kin
0💸
Kumi
0💴
Trait Points
0⚔️
LMFAO! I joke around all the time bro! Even to the extend that Netsui gets tired of it XD
And I get what you mean. I too have a crazy idea for the next one, haha.
*Squints eyes suspiciously* Nah, I'm just messing with you. XD. You've jokef around too much to be called 'humourless'.

Well I will release the next chapter in a month and a half (exams a month away), so we'll see what happens.

It seems as though your writing is improving with each chapter. I like that you're fleshing out Mikoto in this because we never saw much of her in canon. This chapter seems a little short on action though, too much training and too much of a pillow fight. I am still intrigued with you story so I'll keep reading. I just wish I could get used to a genius Naruto but I guess that's what intrigues me.
Well I am in a pseudo learning phase. My chapters will slowly keep getting better with time (I guess that's a given since practice makes perfect).

Yeah, I get what you mean. I'm making this a tad bit too childish. I'll have a fight scene in the next chapter, after my break of course.
 
Last edited:

Michael92

Legendary
Joined
Dec 3, 2009
Messages
12,929
Kin
13,586💸
Kumi
74,447💴
Trait Points
0⚔️
*Squints eyes suspiciously* Nah, I'm just messing with you. XD. You've jokef around too much to be called 'humourless'.

Well I will release the next chapter in a month and a half (exams a month away), so we'll see what happens.



Well I am in a pseudo learning phase. My chapters will slowly keep getting better with time (I guess that's a given since practice makes perfect).

Yeah, I get what you mean. I'm making this a tad bit too childish. I'll have a fight scene in the next chapter, after my break of course.
Lmao, well some people can handle it, others' can't. But there's ages between my jokes and the likes of Flaw and John's (which shouldn't ring any bell to you I suppose, haha). So yeah, I joke around like any other member on here I suppose you can say xd

As for improving, I'm sure you will keep getting better as you go, also with your grammar (at least that's how I reckon I've done it anyways. But I suppose most of it was because of how I wanted to improve and how grammar and such became more and more important to me). My first series always felt quite good until I took a new look at it some years ago. The grammar and the sentence construction and fluency completely sucked, and I don't even understand how people managed to get through it back then xD Story-telling was always my strong side so I suppose I can thank it for most of my "success" so far, although I easily can say that I've improved by comparing my recent work to the past.
 

FaHaD 5212

Active member
Regular
Joined
Jan 8, 2013
Messages
1,365
Kin
0💸
Kumi
0💴
Trait Points
0⚔️
Lmao, well some people can handle it, others' can't. But there's ages between my jokes and the likes of Flaw and John's (which shouldn't ring any bell to you I suppose, haha). So yeah, I joke around like any other member on here I suppose you can say xd

As for improving, I'm sure you will keep getting better as you go, also with your grammar (at least that's how I reckon I've done it anyways. But I suppose most of it was because of how I wanted to improve and how grammar and such became more and more important to me). My first series always felt quite good until I took a new look at it some years ago. The grammar and the sentence construction and fluency completely sucked, and I don't even understand how people managed to get through it back then xD Story-telling was always my strong side so I suppose I can thank it for most of my "success" so far, although I easily can say that I've improved by comparing my recent work to the past.
Yeah, I know you aren't an emotionless robot (You aren't, right?XD).

I get what you mean. It's the 'improve as you progress' rule which is applicable to anything.
 

Michael92

Legendary
Joined
Dec 3, 2009
Messages
12,929
Kin
13,586💸
Kumi
74,447💴
Trait Points
0⚔️
Yeah, I know you aren't an emotionless robot (You aren't, right?XD).

I get what you mean. It's the 'improve as you progress' rule which is applicable to anything.
Lmao, what if I am? :rolleyes: xd Problem? :| XD

Indeed, although not applicable to anyone. Improvement doesn't come by itself. Always remember to write with passion and to not overestimate yourself ;)
 

Kuroi Honoo

Active member
Regular
Joined
Dec 2, 2009
Messages
1,473
Kin
0💸
Kumi
0💴
Trait Points
0⚔️
FINALLY-we enter the Danzou XD It’s unfortunate that he is gradually finding out about Naruto’s amazing gifts. I’m not surprised anymore with the timeskips in fact it’s become something to be expected lol This kid has dealt with some grueling training and has come a considerable ways-it’s amazing just how much he’s overcome since he began! O.O Nana is a little perverted, I’m shocked-alert, alert, child pornography!!! XD Oh man, as if things couldn’t get anymore awkward, Mikoto walks in lol I thought Itachi having learned the crow techniques from his mother was EPIC!!! It’s great that Mikoto is training Nana ^^ So Naruto’s training is nearing it’s end, that is good to see as I’m eager to see what comes afterwards. I thought this chapter was fantastic and I especially enjoyed Danzou’s introduction! =D

This chapter was well done! ;) So I’m up to date and it feels really good! ^^ I’m definitely looking forward to your next release! =D
 
  • Like
Reactions: FaHaD 5212

FaHaD 5212

Active member
Regular
Joined
Jan 8, 2013
Messages
1,365
Kin
0💸
Kumi
0💴
Trait Points
0⚔️
Lmao, what if I am? :rolleyes: xd Problem? :| XD

Indeed, although not applicable to anyone. Improvement doesn't come by itself. Always remember to write with passion and to not overestimate yourself ;)
XD

I believe that everyone improves with practice, progress. Don't worry about me getting overconfident, you know me well enough (or do you?:reborn::scorps:)

FINALLY-we enter the Danzou XD It’s unfortunate that he is gradually finding out about Naruto’s amazing gifts. I’m not surprised anymore with the timeskips in fact it’s become something to be expected lol This kid has dealt with some grueling training and has come a considerable ways-it’s amazing just how much he’s overcome since he began! O.O Nana is a little perverted, I’m shocked-alert, alert, child pornography!!! XD Oh man, as if things couldn’t get anymore awkward, Mikoto walks in lol I thought Itachi having learned the crow techniques from his mother was EPIC!!! It’s great that Mikoto is training Nana ^^ So Naruto’s training is nearing it’s end, that is good to see as I’m eager to see what comes afterwards. I thought this chapter was fantastic and I especially enjoyed Danzou’s introduction! =D

This chapter was well done! ;) So I’m up to date and it feels really good! ^^ I’m definitely looking forward to your next release! =D
I'll write a consolidated reply for all the previous chapters here.

Well, I figured that comedy would be a good way to ensnare readers. Believe me when I say that all the 'mature' comedy in the previous chapters was actually formed with innocent intentions. You've got Michael to thank for pointing it out to me or I would have been oblivious to it and this chapter would have been serious.

Yeah, I always wanted to write a Sharingan Naruto Fanfic, however you might, might, be wrong on the account of him being 'good', society's version of good, as you said in one of the previous chapters.

Thanks for the support. Next chapter should be out by one and a half to two months (20th-23rd May).


Oh and Michael, you might have a rival for my favorite reviewer.
 

Michael92

Legendary
Joined
Dec 3, 2009
Messages
12,929
Kin
13,586💸
Kumi
74,447💴
Trait Points
0⚔️
XD

I believe that everyone improves with practice, progress. Don't worry about me getting overconfident, you know me well enough (or do you?:reborn::scorps:)



I'll write a consolidated reply for all the previous chapters here.

Well, I figured that comedy would be a good way to ensnare readers. Believe me when I say that all the 'mature' comedy in the previous chapters was actually formed with innocent intentions. You've got Michael to thank for pointing it out to me or I would have been oblivious to it and this chapter would have been serious.

Yeah, I always wanted to write a Sharingan Naruto Fanfic, however you might, might, be wrong on the account of him being 'good', society's version of good, as you said in one of the previous chapters.

Thanks for the support. Next chapter should be out by one and a half to two months (20th-23rd May).


Oh and Michael, you might have a rival for my favorite reviewer.
Not the ones who don't think they need to improve. Like Itachi told Kabuto, perfection doesn't exist. If you strive to get better, you will. If you neglect sceptism over your own writing completely, you won't be able to improve. That's not relevant in your case I'm sure, despite the fact that you've said you've skipped out z bit on going through your chapters before a release sometimes :rolleyes:

XD

Haven't I mentioned how great of a reviewer Kuroi is in many of my chapters already? =p The fact is already familiar to me ;)
 
Last edited:

Kuroi Honoo

Active member
Regular
Joined
Dec 2, 2009
Messages
1,473
Kin
0💸
Kumi
0💴
Trait Points
0⚔️
XD

I believe that everyone improves with practice, progress. Don't worry about me getting overconfident, you know me well enough (or do you?:reborn::scorps:)



I'll write a consolidated reply for all the previous chapters here.

Well, I figured that comedy would be a good way to ensnare readers. Believe me when I say that all the 'mature' comedy in the previous chapters was actually formed with innocent intentions. You've got Michael to thank for pointing it out to me or I would have been oblivious to it and this chapter would have been serious.

Yeah, I always wanted to write a Sharingan Naruto Fanfic, however you might, might, be wrong on the account of him being 'good', society's version of good, as you said in one of the previous chapters.

Thanks for the support. Next chapter should be out by one and a half to two months (20th-23rd May).


Oh and Michael, you might have a rival for my favorite reviewer.
Well, you’re correct about the humor attracting readers, in my honest opinion ;)

LOL Michael is truly superb for noting things :) And hey, there’s nothing wrong with a little dirtiness XD

Forgive me if I sound naive for asking but could you elaborate a little more on what you meant by someone “being good”?

You’re very welcome and that is a ways from now but I look forward to it nevertheless my friend ;)

And I feel really honored by you and Mikey's compliment over me as a reviewer ^^

Not the ones who don't think they need to improve. Like Itachi told Kabuto, perfection doesn't exist. If you strive to get better, you will. If you neglect sceptism over your own writing completely, you won't be able to improve. That's not relevant in your case I'm sure, despite the fact that you've said you've skipped out z bit on going through your chapters before a release sometimes :rolleyes:

XD

Haven't I mentioned how great of a reviewer Kuroi is in many of my chapters already? =p The fact is already familiar to me ;)
:flowers for the both of you! =D
 
Last edited:

FaHaD 5212

Active member
Regular
Joined
Jan 8, 2013
Messages
1,365
Kin
0💸
Kumi
0💴
Trait Points
0⚔️
Not the ones who don't think they need to improve. Like Itachi told Kabuto, perfection doesn't exist. If you strive to get better, you will. If you neglect sceptism over your own writing completely, you won't be able to improve. That's not relevant in your case I'm sure, despite the fact that you've said you've skipped out z bit on going through your chapters before a release sometimes :rolleyes:

XD

Haven't I mentioned how great of a reviewer Kuroi is in many of my chapters already? =p The fact is already familiar to me ;)
I suppose you're right (I have no mind in my head left to thinkXD). Well you know I for one always aim to improve.

Well, you’re correct about the humor attracting readers, in my honest opinion ;)

LOL Michael is truly superb for noting things :) And hey, there’s nothing wrong with a little dirtiness XD

Forgive me if I sound naive for asking but could you elaborate a little more on what you meant by someone “being good”?

You’re very welcome and that is a ways from now but I look forward to it nevertheless my friend ;)

And I feel really honored by you and Mikey's compliment over me as a reviewer ^^



:flowers for the both of you! =D
Glad to see you like it.

I won't deny that Mic has notable, noting capabilities. Lol.

Don't worry, this is just one of the things we just ignore in our society. It's like this, you do good for others and don't expect gratitude, you forgive the transgressions of others, you try your best to remain forgiving when others wrong you. You probably get an idea of what I'm saying, if not then I don't blame you (I wouldn't get me myself given this explanation, at least not instantly). This is what society considers good (e.g. Canon Naruto). To clarify the 'good' once more, I'll give an example of it like this: "Assume that someone or a group has wronged you once, you forgive them. They do so again, you forgive once more. This continues dozens or more times until you reach your breaking point and lash out at them and the like". Being 'good in society demands that you continue this forgiveness (I know this isn't the best example but I can't think of anything else at the moment). Now what I'm aiming at making my Naruto is something akin to a personality which combines that of Sasuke's and Madara's yet has a kind of moral codes (and lacks them simultaneously). To conclude, you can say that Naruto will be quite dark most of the time (Could change to half). Anyway, if you're still confused, feel free to ask however I would appreciate it if you be a little more specific so as to what.

I'll try my best to make it worth the wait.

Hehe, thanks:win:. You DO deserve the compliments, however.
 

Michael92

Legendary
Joined
Dec 3, 2009
Messages
12,929
Kin
13,586💸
Kumi
74,447💴
Trait Points
0⚔️
I suppose you're right (I have no mind in my head left to thinkXD). Well you know I for one always aim to improve.



Glad to see you like it.

I won't deny that Mic has notable, noting capabilities. Lol.

Don't worry, this is just one of the things we just ignore in our society. It's like this, you do good for others and don't expect gratitude, you forgive the transgressions of others, you try your best to remain forgiving when others wrong you. You probably get an idea of what I'm saying, if not then I don't blame you (I wouldn't get me myself given this explanation, at least not instantly). This is what society considers good (e.g. Canon Naruto). To clarify the 'good' once more, I'll give an example of it like this: "Assume that someone or a group has wronged you once, you forgive them. They do so again, you forgive once more. This continues dozens or more times until you reach your breaking point and lash out at them and the like". Being 'good in society demands that you continue this forgiveness (I know this isn't the best example but I can't think of anything else at the moment). Now what I'm aiming at making my Naruto is something akin to a personality which combines that of Sasuke's and Madara's yet has a kind of moral codes (and lacks them simultaneously). To conclude, you can say that Naruto will be quite dark most of the time (Could change to half). Anyway, if you're still confused, feel free to ask however I would appreciate it if you be a little more specific so as to what.

I'll try my best to make it worth the wait.

Hehe, thanks:win:. You DO deserve the compliments, however.
That's one heck of a reply xd o_O I'll reply to the former part though ;)

I was thinking... Since I have revealed some preview materials, why don't you do the same? =D XD Should spice things up a bit :rolleyes: ;)

Oh, and if we keep going like this, you will finally hit 2 pages with this one. And that's before the contest has started! =p

As for your post, we should all strive to become better, always, no matter what, no matter the stake! :hyper: o_O
 

Kuroi Honoo

Active member
Regular
Joined
Dec 2, 2009
Messages
1,473
Kin
0💸
Kumi
0💴
Trait Points
0⚔️
Glad to see you like it.

I won't deny that Mic has notable, noting capabilities. Lol.

Don't worry, this is just one of the things we just ignore in our society. It's like this, you do good for others and don't expect gratitude, you forgive the transgressions of others, you try your best to remain forgiving when others wrong you. You probably get an idea of what I'm saying, if not then I don't blame you (I wouldn't get me myself given this explanation, at least not instantly). This is what society considers good (e.g. Canon Naruto). To clarify the 'good' once more, I'll give an example of it like this: "Assume that someone or a group has wronged you once, you forgive them. They do so again, you forgive once more. This continues dozens or more times until you reach your breaking point and lash out at them and the like". Being 'good in society demands that you continue this forgiveness (I know this isn't the best example but I can't think of anything else at the moment). Now what I'm aiming at making my Naruto is something akin to a personality which combines that of Sasuke's and Madara's yet has a kind of moral codes (and lacks them simultaneously). To conclude, you can say that Naruto will be quite dark most of the time (Could change to half). Anyway, if you're still confused, feel free to ask however I would appreciate it if you be a little more specific so as to what.

I'll try my best to make it worth the wait.

Hehe, thanks:win:. You DO deserve the compliments, however.
Your work is very likeable and if someone didn’t like it then something must be wrong with them or they simply don’t like Naruto ;)

You’re such a considerable person-thank you so much for in depth explanation, it was extremely helpful and I now completely understand. And I like the spin you’re giving to your version of Naruto =D That’s really wonderful to hear and I really look forward to how you continue to shape his character! :hooray:

Thank you again for the compliment, my friend :happy:
 
Top