NB adventures- pilot

This is my username

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NB adventures Chapter 1​



I am lost. Where am I? Wait... i think there's a city there.

I enter the city. The guardian there said: "Username?" "Umm..." i responded.
"Pasword?" he continued. "What?" I asked. "Wrong username or password! Forgot your password? Sing Up?" he said. I was very confused. I said "Sing up!". Then i said my username "Alexandru098!".

"Username?" he asked. I facepalmed myself and said: "THIS is my username!". And the stupid guardian responded: "Password?". I got mad, but then i calmed down and said the pasword. "Confirm password!" he said. I said my password again. And then i said my email and he let me enter.

It was a very strange place. The city was called "Naruto Base". It had a lot of sections and subsections. Everybody were making little houses they called "threads". and in them everybody was talking about one subject. i visited some threads.

Then i asked a person what should i do, and he answered that i should make a thread in the "konnicci wa"* section. Then i went to that section. After 5 minutes. I finnaly made a thread. I called it "Hi!".

Then suddenly a lot of people came there. They were all saying the same thing: "Welcome to the base!". Some said "nice username". I was very happy to see that i am welcomed there.

When, suddenly, something very strange happened. A very ugly man came into here. He started insulting me he said that he “-rep” me! and said to go away from the base. All the people were looking at him. I heard some people whispering “Troll! He is a troll!”.

I was very shoked. But suddenly, somebody pressed a big, red button. on the button it was written “report”. When he pressed that button, a very tall man came here. He said:
“ Dear Troll,
You have received an infraction at NarutoBase Forums.”

Suddenly, the “troll” stopped moving. I asked him: “Umm... who are you?”. He responded:”I am an mod! I ban trolls! No troll can escape my banning! Except...”. He took a pause and then said "DL!"...

:izuna::izuna::izuna: Next chapter: What is a fanboy? :izuna::izuna::izuna:

What do you think?
 
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Kagutsuchi

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Ok, I have repped you and thank this post for only one reason. It is unique. Everything else is a disaster. You should improve on the format and give proper spacing and dialogues. Seems like too much text is in one line. Make is attractive to eyes so that reader can read it with interest
 

This is my username

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Ok, I have repped you and thank this post for only one reason. It is unique. Everything else is a disaster. You should improve on the format and give proper spacing and dialogues. Seems like too much text is in one line. Make is attractive to eyes so that reader can read it with interest
thanks.

it's a pilot, i might change it.
 
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