[Discussion] Is revenge bad ?

[Dãrth1]

I can't feel bad when they willingly chose to take advantage of me, abuse me, or hurt my family. It's karma. They chose to do wrong, therefore they must suffer their own bad karma. It's their fault, not mine for their choice.

I'm a very kind and nice woman, who gives many chances, but even I have learned some people choose to be rotten and bring about their own misery, even when offered a better path.

But there are people that do wrong and don't suffer

 

[Lady M]

But there are people that do wrong and don't suffer

I thought that too, but karma always finds them, even if it's years later.

 

[Tennis Robot]

I can't feel bad when they willingly chose to take advantage of me, abuse me, or hurt my family. It's karma. They chose to do wrong, therefore they must suffer their own bad karma. It's their fault, not mine for their choice.

I'm a very kind and nice woman, who gives many chances, but even I have learned some people choose to be rotten and bring about their own misery, even when offered a better path.

That is all in your head. You feel entitled to a certain lifestyle, and you see yourself a certain way. You assume that what they did was wrong, as if they were simply flawed beings. I went into more detail about that a little farther up. Anyway, it is your own selfishness that ultimately leads you to think that way.

Is that how you should live? What do you deserve that someone else doesn't? What makes you entitled to live the way you do while someone else is suffering? Are you really content with that?

 

[Lady M]

That is all in your head. You feel entitled to a certain lifestyle, and you see yourself a certain way. You assume that what they did was wrong, as if they were simply flawed beings. I went into more detail about that a little farther up. Anyway, it is your own selfishness that ultimately leads you to think that way.

Is that how you should live? What do you deserve that someone else doesn't? What makes you entitled to live the way you do while someone else is suffering? Are you really content with that?

I spent all my life allowing everyone in, giving chances, helping my enemies and forgiving so many wrongs that tore my heart, but still the same abuse was returned in place of whatever good they could have shown. I even felt bad when karma got them. Now when someone wrongs me, I just ignore them and let their own choices decide their fate. I don't dwell, I don't think about it, I just move on.

 

[Jazzy Stardust]

It helps you move on I think and also helps you feel like you didn't just get screwed by someone and didn't do anything. I think it would be terrible to just have that hate in your heart and always thinking of what you could've done.

Revenge doesn't leave you with that feeling.

 

[Tennis Robot]

I spent all my life allowing everyone in, giving chances, helping my enemies and forgiving so many wrongs that tore my heart, but still the same abuse was returned in place of whatever good they could have shown. I even felt bad when karma got them. Now when someone wrongs me, I just ignore them and let their own choices decide their fate. I don't dwell, I don't think about it, I just move on.

You still assume that you have been wronged. Understanding is more important than forgiveness. How can someone be truly selfless? Is it possible to be altruistic?

 

[Lady M]

You still assume that you have been wronged. Understanding is more important than forgiveness. How can someone be truly selfless? Is it possible to be altruistic?

When you are stalked, abused, physically beaten and broken spiritually, you kind of are wronged. Yet I forgive all of them for doing that, because I too am like you that way, but after over 20 years of it, I have simply lost the will.

 

[-Punk-]

Im a believer of an eye for an eye.

 

[Tennis Robot]

When you are stalked, abused, physically beaten and broken spiritually, you kind of are wronged. Yet I forgive all of them for doing that, because I too am like you that way, but after over 20 years of it, I have simply lost the will.

Only if you feel entitled and don't understand the other person. I can tell you a lot of stories about abuse and drugs. I spent the first 12 years of my life believing that everything I did was wrong, and that I deserved the (near daily) beatings and constant streams of insults I received because no one seemed to think that any of it was wrong. I don't resent any of the people who either subjected me to or allowed me to be subjected to that, because I know why they did it. I guess that’s my problem though. I want to prove to myself that I can be a good person, but how is that possible if everything I do is ultimately only for my own benefit?

 

[Lady M]

Only if you feel entitled and don't understand the other person. I can tell you a lot of stories about abuse and drugs. I spent the first 12 years of my life believing that everything I did was wrong, and that I deserved the (near daily) beatings and constant streams of insults I received because no one seemed to think that any of it was wrong. I don't resent any of the people who either subjected me to or allowed me to be subjected to that, because I know why they did it. I guess that’s my problem though. I want to prove to myself that I can be a good person, but how is that possible if everything I do is ultimately only for my own benefit?

You are pure, and good and you have a good heart, I can tell, but you can't let others come before you. It seems selfish, I know, I felt that way too, but we only live once, and while it's ok to think of others, we need to consider ourselves first. If we can't understand ourselves, if we can't help ourselves, how can we do it for others? I tried to help a broken man, while I was broken and we broke each other further instead. Don't change who you are, just remember that you need to take care of yourself too.

 

[Tennis Robot]

You are pure, and good and you have a good heart, I can tell, but you can't let others come before you. It seems selfish, I know, I felt that way too, but we only live once, and while it's ok to think of others, we need to consider ourselves first. If we can't understand ourselves, if we can't help ourselves, how can we do it for others? I tried to help a broken man, while I was broken and we broke each other further instead. Don't change who you are, just remember that you need to take care of yourself too.

I can't do that. I can't be sure if I'm not lying to myself (and everyone else) until there is real evidence. It has nothing to do with the pain itself. I just gradually realized how easily it could have been avoided, and no one around me has ever seemed to notice. I can't use something like that only for myself. And I don't know what I want for myself anyway.

 

[Lady M]

I can't do that. I can't be sure if I'm not lying to myself (and everyone else) until there is real evidence. It has nothing to do with the pain itself. I just gradually realized how easily it could have been avoided, and no one around me has ever seemed to notice. I can't use something like that only for myself. And I don't know what I want for myself anyway.

Until you know what you want, you might remain conflicted with what you consider right or wrong. It's something you have to learn on your own. I can't tell you what to do or how to feel, but I can advise you to focus more on yourself for now, but never forget others too, and no one has a right to walk all over you, so don't give them that right.

 

[Tennis Robot]

Until you know what you want, you might remain conflicted with what you consider right or wrong. It's something you have to learn on your own. I can't tell you what to do or how to feel, but I can advise you to focus more on yourself for now, but never forget others too, and no one has a right to walk all over you, so don't give them that right.

I think I explained it poorly. There are too many other details.

 

[Lady M]

I think I explained it poorly. There are too many other details.

You can tell me in a PM or VM. I am very understanding.

 

[Tennis Robot]

You can tell me in a PM or VM. I am very understanding.

It isn't necessary. There are people with much worse problems than me and almost no one who can begin to understand or even think about them as deeply as I do. There's also the chance that I'm lying and just looking for sympathy/attention. I don't think I need/deserve to be worried about and I know for a fact that I am the only person who can make myself happy.

 

[Lady M]

It isn't necessary. There are people with much worse problems than me and almost no one who can begin to understand or even think about them as deeply as I do. There's also the chance that I'm lying and just looking for sympathy/attention. I don't think I need/deserve to be worried about and I know for a fact that I am the only person who can make myself happy.

Well for future reference, if you need someone to just listen, it's not a bother. ^^

 

[UCE]

It's bad. But if i have a good reason to take revenge, i'll take it. Couldn't care less what others think.

 

[Forest]

when you have a good reason,like someone kills your whole family ?

If yes how far would you go,harm the person who did it or harm his family too ?

I'd see that justice was served. Whatever it takes for that to happen would entail from there. As far as revenge itself, can't really judge it. I'd say that it depends on the type of revenge? Overall I just try to avoid conflict where revenge would seriously threaten mine and others peace and wellness.

 

[KingOfAnons]

Yes, because only God can cast judgement upon people.

 

[Strawberry]

revenge fills avoid