How to pick up girls for dummies

[Unbiased]

This is a guide to pick up all the ladies.

1: Seem confident even though you are not. Confidence is key and the biggest factor. If you can't accept yourself for who you are and talk openly how can she? If your confidence is lacking due to not being able to strike up a conversation or not knowing her interest find out through subliminal ways. Friends/Facebook/myspace/twitter all that garbage holds lots of information that will tell you her likes and dislikes. Even though you have zero self confidence and cannot strike up a random conversation you now can find out what she is into thus giving you the opportunity to striking up a conversation.

2: Find the hair style that looks good on you. That generic short hair stuff works but by giving yourself something unique you stand out. People are more interested now that you don't look cliche.

3: Everyone is talented in certain areas. Examples being some people are amazing artist in regards to drawing. Show off your drawing and talents if you are able too. While doing that you display not only confidence but talent. Everyone loves talent and people who can play musical instruments have it easier.

4: Go for the ones that have zero self confidence if your looking for a long term relationship or someone who won't treat you like garbage. For example there's a good chance that because she has no self confidence she isn't going to act like she can get another guy so she'll treat you like a god.

5: Don't dress to impress. That only attracts girls that aren't interested in you but your money. Besides you can spend the money that you would spend on nice clothes and shoes, on bacon. Bacon > Clothes and shoes. That doesn't mean you wear trashy clothes but don't make it seem like your filthy rich. I've met people when I was in high school that dressed like regular kids but their parents/grand parents were multimillionaires.

6: Make sure she isn't easy to get. The easy ones generally have some sort of family dilemma or some sort of issues. If you don't mind helping them then its fine but if you don't want to get involved like that then stay away.

7: Be nice but not too nice. Don't kiss up too them but be respectful. If you kiss up to them they'll treat you like garbage.

8: If you have the confidence, ask them if they were to date a guy if they would serve him bacon naked. If she would that one is a total keeper.

Bonus points

Playing guitar while walking around campus attracts girls no matter how stupid and uneducated you are.

Putting a piece of paper on your shirt or creating your own shirts will attract attention which will attract females.
Examples-I go food shopping in abortion clinic dumpsters will attract attention along with My daddy says I love you with his belt.

Straightening your hair always works for those of you in middle school and high school.

Brush your teeth.

Having a sense of humor. (If you lack one watch every code monkeys episode 4 times as often as possible and you'll get a great sense of humor.)

Smile I put that second only to having confidence.

that's all I can think of.

 

[SoupAddicttt]

If a guide is the only way for someone to get girls.. Well.. :|

 

[Unbiased]

If a guide is the only way for someone to get girls.. Well.. :|

No it was just a random improv I had. Although they're easier methods like slipping roofies in her vodka

 

[markdabomb22]

Any of these pick up lines is a one way ticket to..... well just test them your self

Spoiler

1. “Is your boyfriend sitting here?” (He sits down.) “Now he is.”
2. “Hey, I bet nobody’s ever picked you up like this before.” (Tosses condom onto table.)
3. (Instant message on a dating site.) “I’d like to participate in nude wrestling with you, followed by a happy ending.”
4. “A guy friend asked me, ‘So are you single now?’ and when I told him yes, his response was, ‘Good, want to bone?’”
5. “Can I have your phone number? I’m going into the hospital for a few weeks, and I’d really like someone to talk to.”
6. “Hey, baby, wanna ride my escalator?”
7. “If I were a squirrel and you were a squirrel, would you let me bust a nut in your hole?”
8. “Can I push your stool in?”
9. “Can I wear your thighs for ear muffs?”
10. “So, girls with big lips are usually pretty good at something … Are you?”
11. “Guy: ‘Do you have any Italian in you?’ Me: ‘Nooo.’ Guy: ‘Want some?’”
12. “The doctor said my mono has finally cleared up. Want to make out?”
13. “You look like a smurf, a hot smurf.”
14. “Hey, I hear your ankles are having a party. You want to invite your pants down?”
15. “If you jingle my bells, I’ll promise you a white Christmas.”
16. “Oh, so you’re American? I would never have guessed. You’re quite the cunning linguist.”
17. “Save water. Shower with me.”
18. “My hands are freezing cold! Can I warm them on your breasts?”
19. “Hey, hey, did it hurt? Huh? Well, did it hurt? When you fell from heaven?”
20. “I have an 11-inch penis.”

 

[Unbiased]

Any of these pick up lines is a one way ticket to..... well just test them your self

Spoiler

1. “Is your boyfriend sitting here?” (He sits down.) “Now he is.”
2. “Hey, I bet nobody’s ever picked you up like this before.” (Tosses condom onto table.)
3. (Instant message on a dating site.) “I’d like to participate in nude wrestling with you, followed by a happy ending.”
4. “A guy friend asked me, ‘So are you single now?’ and when I told him yes, his response was, ‘Good, want to bone?’”
5. “Can I have your phone number? I’m going into the hospital for a few weeks, and I’d really like someone to talk to.”
6. “Hey, baby, wanna ride my escalator?”
7. “If I were a squirrel and you were a squirrel, would you let me bust a nut in your hole?”
8. “Can I push your stool in?”
9. “Can I wear your thighs for ear muffs?”
10. “So, girls with big lips are usually pretty good at something … Are you?”
11. “Guy: ‘Do you have any Italian in you?’ Me: ‘Nooo.’ Guy: ‘Want some?’”
12. “The doctor said my mono has finally cleared up. Want to make out?”
13. “You look like a smurf, a hot smurf.”
14. “Hey, I hear your ankles are having a party. You want to invite your pants down?”
15. “If you jingle my bells, I’ll promise you a white Christmas.”
16. “Oh, so you’re American? I would never have guessed. You’re quite the cunning linguist.”
17. “Save water. Shower with me.”
18. “My hands are freezing cold! Can I warm them on your breasts?”
19. “Hey, hey, did it hurt? Huh? Well, did it hurt? When you fell from heaven?”
20. “I have an 11-inch penis.”

2,3,8,15 lol

 

[Noobastank]

Any of these pick up lines is a one way ticket to..... well just test them your self

Spoiler

1. “Is your boyfriend sitting here?” (He sits down.) “Now he is.”
2. “Hey, I bet nobody’s ever picked you up like this before.” (Tosses condom onto table.)
3. (Instant message on a dating site.) “I’d like to participate in nude wrestling with you, followed by a happy ending.”
4. “A guy friend asked me, ‘So are you single now?’ and when I told him yes, his response was, ‘Good, want to bone?’”
5. “Can I have your phone number? I’m going into the hospital for a few weeks, and I’d really like someone to talk to.”
6. “Hey, baby, wanna ride my escalator?”
7. “If I were a squirrel and you were a squirrel, would you let me bust a nut in your hole?”
8. “Can I push your stool in?”
9. “Can I wear your thighs for ear muffs?”
10. “So, girls with big lips are usually pretty good at something … Are you?”
11. “Guy: ‘Do you have any Italian in you?’ Me: ‘Nooo.’ Guy: ‘Want some?’”
12. “The doctor said my mono has finally cleared up. Want to make out?”
13. “You look like a smurf, a hot smurf.”
14. “Hey, I hear your ankles are having a party. You want to invite your pants down?”
15. “If you jingle my bells, I’ll promise you a white Christmas.”
16. “Oh, so you’re American? I would never have guessed. You’re quite the cunning linguist.”
17. “Save water. Shower with me.”
18. “My hands are freezing cold! Can I warm them on your breasts?”
19. “Hey, hey, did it hurt? Huh? Well, did it hurt? When you fell from heaven?”
20. “I have an 11-inch penis.”

This works ^^:scorps: just got 20 new b*tches thanks to you.

 

[Wang]

I'd rather pickup girls that are dummies.

 

[Unbiased]

I'd rather pickup girls that are dummies.

Everyone fits into that category then.

 

[straightup]

First and for most bro... You got it all wrong about picking up girls. Following those guidelines will screw you more than save you

Example.

1) girls with zero confidence are waaaay more likely to cheat than girls who know they can get any guy. When a confident girl chooses you it's because she wants YOU! And a girl with no confidence will take what she can get until something better rolls around

2) always dress as nice as you can. When girls see a nicely dressed man they do t think dollar signs... Well most of them dl don't. What they do see is a man that knows how to take care of them selves and in turn take care of them.

3) be talented but always be modest. Noone likes that ******* that walks around playing guitar. People see right through them. If you want to show off then use your talent and focus it onto one girl as apprised to playing invitation in the middle of the school. Pick a girl you like and make a song for HER instead. Even if she's not into you she will be extremely flattered and it could lead to more.

4) you should exert confidence. A good way to do that is never break eye contact. Let her be the onto to look away. Confront her and let her know how you feel. Even if your dog ugly she will be flattered so there's nothing to worry about.

5) one more tip.. Make her laugh. If you can make her laugh she's yours


For more tips on getting your dream girl pm me. I've been with a lot of ladies and I've done a lot of things and I don't even consider myself too attractive

 

[Mosgoved]

just say i have a big penis. works everytime

 

[Shinobi Train]

:rofl: No. There might be a few good tips in there, but a lot of that is wrong. xd The only way to truly fail though is to try and use a pickup line, so at least you didn't list that. If you just smile a lot and aren't afraid to introduce yourself to people you don't know then everything's fine. You must also dress nicely, using layers if possible, and expensive does not equal nice so you can do it on a modest budget.

The only time you should show off your talent is when you have them somewhat alone. If you want to take the musician approach then start a garage band type thing with a few other people and once you've been spending some time with a girl you can then invite her practice maybe.

However, the most important thing is to be genuinely interested in things that girls like. You can't fake it, you really have to like stuff that stereotypical guys don't. You have to like cute stuff, and you have to hate watching sports, you can like playing sports, but you have to hate watching sports. You have to like shopping, especially for clothes. You have to be able to cook, and not just a little bit, you have to be a master chef. Your favorite color has to be pink or purple, pinkish purple is ideal since you don't want it to be too pink or it might be weird, however you can wear a pink shirt if you can pull it off.

In other words, you have to change your nature. Guys are always thinking "me big and tough, me Hulk smash." That type of thinking will get you nowhere with a decent girl, especially not one in today's world. You have to be smart, you want to be a nerd, but not look like one. You have to be sensitive and deep, but at the same time you have to give off the feeling of being able to beat anyone in a fight.

Lastly, you need to like this song:

 

[James Harrsion]

:rofl: No. There might be a few good tips in there, but a lot of that is wrong. xd The only way to truly fail though is to try and use a pickup line, so at least you didn't list that. If you just smile a lot and aren't afraid to introduce yourself to people you don't know then everything's fine. You must also dress nicely, using layers if possible, and expensive does not equal nice so you can do it on a modest budget.

The only time you should show off your talent is when you have them somewhat alone. If you want to take the musician approach then start a garage band type thing with a few other people and once you've been spending some time with a girl you can then invite her practice maybe.

However, the most important thing is to be genuinely interested in things that girls like. You can't fake it, you really have to like stuff that stereotypical guys don't. You have to like cute stuff, and you have to hate watching sports, you can like playing sports, but you have to hate watching sports. You have to like shopping, especially for clothes. You have to be able to cook, and not just a little bit, you have to be a master chef. Your favorite color has to be pink or purple, pinkish purple is ideal since you don't want it to be too pink or it might be weird, however you can wear a pink shirt if you can pull it off.

In other words, you have to change your nature. Guys are always thinking "me big and tough, me Hulk smash." That type of thinking will get you nowhere with a decent girl, especially not one in today's world. You have to be smart, you want to be a nerd, but not look like one. You have to be sensitive and deep, but at the same time you have to give off the feeling of being able to beat anyone in a fight.

Lastly, you need to like this song:

I have no talent( I'm adaptable but aren't we all?)-I have a lot of self confidence-I brush my teeth everday- I dislike watching sports-I don't play sports-I like cute stuff- I'm not afraid to admit I walk around the house in my boxers without my shirt because I think I look like a boss, in fact I told my friend Sam this before we left the bus.
me good? Why would I change myself for a girl? I don't think i'm that sensitive I can be deep I'm smart but I don't study hence my natural smarts decaying-----I look like a boss-. Lol i'm 5'3ft and I think I can beat anyone in a fight -_-

 

[Mandy]

I'd rather pickup girls that are dummies.

haha this xd

 

[Shinobi Train]

I have no talent( I'm adaptable but aren't we all?)-I have a lot of self confidence-I brush my teeth everday- I dislike watching sports-I don't play sports-I like cute stuff- I'm not afraid to admit I walk around the house in my boxers without my shirt because I think I look like a boss, in fact I told my friend Sam this before we left the bus.
me good? Why would I change myself for a girl? I don't think i'm that sensitive I can be deep I'm smart but I don't study hence my natural smarts decaying-----I look like a boss-. Lol i'm 5'3ft and I think I can beat anyone in a fight -_-

You do not change yourself for a girl, you change yourself for you. If you ever do anything simply to impress a girl, if that is your reasoning, then it's a fail and everyone will see through it. Now, you keep thinking of yourself as a "boss"...no, that means you're not a boss. James Bond doesn't go around bragging about how badass he is, but everyone knows he's a badass. Usually it's the guy that's thinking highly of themselves that gets eaten alive by the people around them. Yeah, short guys always want to fight for some reason. xd When you're at least my size, you don't want to fight because you know you'll win...then you'll go to jail for winning. xd

I'm not giving tips for picking up girls so much as how to become Pierce Brosnan. You want to be Pierce at all costs and it's the hardest thing to pull off. However, you can't just be Pierce, you have to be you as well. You have to become a fusion of yourself with a lot of Brosnan. xd

 

[Shirou Emiya]

Lol @ anyone who would believe # 20
My bad nvrmind thought it said 20 in

 

[Grim]

People who needs guide ''how to pick up girl'' will fail for life

 

[Shinobi Train]

You're all wrong, so here I am to teach you how to pick up girls in just 1 step.

Step 1: All girls are liars, if they say they don't want to go into your van because you're a pervert then force them, they like it when you take the initiative.

:| I don't think I need to point out the obvious flaws with your plan...xd

 

[Ultimate uzumaki form]

People who needs guide ''how to pick up girl'' will fail for life

 

[Shinobi Train]

Trust me it works every time, it works even better if you have a pedo stache.

Yes...I just hope the soap in prison isn't too...slippery. xd

 

[DrProof]

Spoiler

This is a guide to pick up all the ladies.

1: Seem confident even though you are not. Confidence is key and the biggest factor. If you can't accept yourself for who you are and talk openly how can she? If your confidence is lacking due to not being able to strike up a conversation or not knowing her interest find out through subliminal ways. Friends/Facebook/myspace/twitter all that garbage holds lots of information that will tell you her likes and dislikes. Even though you have zero self confidence and cannot strike up a random conversation you now can find out what she is into thus giving you the opportunity to striking up a conversation.

2: Find the hair style that looks good on you. That generic short hair stuff works but by giving yourself something unique you stand out. People are more interested now that you don't look cliche.

3: Everyone is talented in certain areas. Examples being some people are amazing artist in regards to drawing. Show off your drawing and talents if you are able too. While doing that you display not only confidence but talent. Everyone loves talent and people who can play musical instruments have it easier.

4: Go for the ones that have zero self confidence if your looking for a long term relationship or someone who won't treat you like garbage. For example there's a good chance that because she has no self confidence she isn't going to act like she can get another guy so she'll treat you like a god.

5: Don't dress to impress. That only attracts girls that aren't interested in you but your money. Besides you can spend the money that you would spend on nice clothes and shoes, on bacon. Bacon > Clothes and shoes. That doesn't mean you wear trashy clothes but don't make it seem like your filthy rich. I've met people when I was in high school that dressed like regular kids but their parents/grand parents were multimillionaires.

6: Make sure she isn't easy to get. The easy ones generally have some sort of family dilemma or some sort of issues. If you don't mind helping them then its fine but if you don't want to get involved like that then stay away.

7: Be nice but not too nice. Don't kiss up too them but be respectful. If you kiss up to them they'll treat you like garbage.

8: If you have the confidence, ask them if they were to date a guy if they would serve him bacon naked. If she would that one is a total keeper.

Bonus points

Playing guitar while walking around campus attracts girls no matter how stupid and uneducated you are.

Putting a piece of paper on your shirt or creating your own shirts will attract attention which will attract females.
Examples-I go food shopping in abortion clinic dumpsters will attract attention along with My daddy says I love you with his belt.

Straightening your hair always works for those of you in middle school and high school.

Brush your teeth.

Having a sense of humor. (If you lack one watch every code monkeys episode 4 times as often as possible and you'll get a great sense of humor.)

Smile I put that second only to having confidence.

that's all I can think of.

On Naruto Base..

Post how to get girls..

The Irony..