Changing goals ... help needed.

[SZiaee]

Hi there... I apologize my English is not so good, and this is gonna be a wall of words. I'm sorry about that.

This is a problem many of us might have faced... You pick up a goal you really like, you talk about your goal to others and get their consult, you start with so much energy and after 2 months you feel so tired about that goal, start resting too much, do some useless things and then you pick another goal...
This is the loop of my life for a year and six months...

For example :
1- I was so good at discrete mathematics in collage, I was sent to computer Olympiad from my collage.
2- I was also good at programming. I was developing Android software from age 16.
3- I tried my best to enter a good university at field of software engineering.
4- I picked a goal : continuing on to get my p.h.D from a good university and becoming a teacher there.
5- The first semester, I was the rank #2 out of 100 students... During this period, I was always happy with my goal.
6- Then the nightmare started... I felt too tired so I decided to listen to music, go to nature, play chess, sleep more, watch films, play games, browse web and instagram too much, etc...
7- But none of those things could make me happy (after 2-3 weeks)... I was just too tired and nothing could help.
8- Then, I decided to take another goal : building video games ; it was always fun for me so why not?
9- Once again I was very happy with the new goal and I had a lot of energy...
10- But, once again, after 2 months I was tired of it....

The goals I have had in recent 2 years : become a good teacher at a good university, become a game developer, become a digital artist, become a chess player, leave the university and start studying high school once again to become a doctor, and now I am intrested in philosophy and I have already bought some philosophy books:elmo: ...

Note : When I say I take a goal, I really mean it... for example I stopped going to classes for 4 months and started studying from the beginning to become a doctor.... That semester, I failed terribly that no one ever expected from me (even myself)...

These thoughts are normal when you are still a kid or teenage... But come on, I'm already 21 :elmo:

Now my parents are dissatisfied with me, I am dissatisfied with the field I am studying at, and I have the goal of becoming a philosopher... But I already know that if I start, I will be tired of this one too...

Has anyone faced this problem? Has anyone heard about the solution to this problem? Please help me. This is so serious.

 

[UCHIHAKUNOICHI]

Hi! What you may be feeling is something related to a premature feeling of feeling your time to achieve goals is running out. And also longing for greater things that can explore your full potential.


With the knowledge you passed on, I guess you are feeling that your potential is somehow to big, to invest full time in any of these goals.
I can assure you that any of these can be quite successful if you invest time in the right one that will give possbilities for you to do the other ones later.

Pythagoras was once a merchant, gained enough money and then took time to do other things: math, music. And was quite successful!

Good luck!

 

[SZiaee]

Hi!

Hi my friend thanks for your response.

What you may be feeling is something related to a premature feeling of

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and something along those lines.

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I feel the run of time and I'm too scared of not becoming happy at the end of my life.
I have seen many old people regretting about their past. Their life is full of "should have"s and "could have"s. I really don't like to end up like that.

With the knowledge you passed on, I guess you are feeling that your potential is somehow to big, to invest full time in any of these goals.
I can assure you that any of these can be quite successful if you invest time in the right one that will give possbilities for you to do the other ones later.

Pythagoras was once a merchant, gained enough money and then took time to do other things: math, music. And was quite successful!

Good luck!

"Loving many goals" isn't my problem right now.
My problem is becoming tired of my goal... I love the goal at the beginning but I end up too tired.
I don't love the previous goal anymore... It doesn't make me happy anymore. I feel I can't live my whole life with that goal anymore.
Thanks though. Special thanks.

 

[Aim64C]

It sounds, to me, as if you are a type of person that is 'above' the current education and certification structure. There are people who have almost limitless raw aptitude, who can learn any subject and, most critically, enjoys the pursuit of learning.

In this case, it is best not to think of "what I want to go to school for" - you could go to school for everything, most probably, and never quite feel as if you'd found what you want to do. So, my recommendation is to stop "high-order" education, and instead focus on trade skills. Take some welding, machine tool, electrician, etc type courses (or some other equivalent for other industries), then seek employment within those fields.

Here is the problem I think you are having - the education system simply can't feed you information fast enough to satisfy your rate of learning. Since the education system in many areas is designed to, almost literally, beat information into the heads of people through tedium so that they remember the psychological abuse on prompt, people who 'learn on contact' with a subject are beyond frustrated with a system that is sluggish and tedious.

Pick something that you think you will enjoy working at, get to a point where you can fulfill the hiring requirements, and then go to school only to expand your certifications needed for further jobs. Subjects you are interested in, learn them as hobbies. Order books from the internet, browse the web pages of the internet, tinker and learn on your own in your spare time, or with groups of other hobbyists doing the same thing(s).

I'm not sure how your home country does things, so my advice may not be the best, but from what you are describing, it sounds like you're bored of school and want to actually be able to do something. So, focus on some skill-based courses to kick off a career/resume with, and then go forth into the world. A lot of the world's first university teachers barely went to school, themselves - they were recognized for their achievements in a field and brought into schools to try and pass their methods of achievement on to others.

 

[minamoto]

i think since u have alll these amazing skills,ur true goal should be : invent (creat)something that was never been invented befor ...

u say u are a good mathematician......good at programming and playing chess...and u like philosophie...(these are rare skills found in 1 person fyi)...

these skills allow you to reach ur goal.....now all u need is a great idea...


all start with a great idea..

 

[kimb]

You lack existential purpose. Though education is inherently rewarding, these career paths should only be a means to achieve greater goals, not be goals in and of themselves.

This is why you become bored with positions at jobs that most people spend the a large chunk of their livlihood attempting to gain. Don't make the credentials or job title the goal, they're a stepping stone. Find your purpose -- maybe start by asking yourself questions; "what do I want to offer to humanity", "what can I contribute to the greater good". Once you do that, you'll know which career path you'll need to take.

 

[HowDidIGetPrem]

Could it be that you get burned out more so than bored? I get interested in a ton of things then drop them the moment I get tired of learning concepts & how to use them.. At the end, all I'm left with is relatively little knowledge to work with & knowing I'll have to face a daunting pile of information, which I've associated with getting burned out, to make something more out of the knowledge I'd gotten. Maybe try something that incorporates two completely different fields so you could hop between the two(if that's feasible)?

 

[SZiaee]

i think since u have alll these amazing skills,ur true goal should be : invent (creat)something that was never been invented befor ...

u say u are a good mathematician......good at programming and playing chess...and u like philosophie...(these are rare skills found in 1 person fyi)...

these skills allow you to reach ur goal.....now all u need is a great idea...


all start with a great idea..

Hi bro, special thanks for your response.
If I find my goal, then I will definitely try my best to reach it. The problem is that I don't have a goal... I change my goals.
I am lost in too many goals.
I like to start with a great idea... I found a great idea a year ago: I decided to build games. I built two games (those who built a game here, know how hard the process of making a game is) but 7 months ago, I became too tired of game making and changed my goal to becoming a digital artist... At first I loved to make great drawings digitally but after 2 months it seemed boring to me.
So, I find a great idea... The problem is "I can not stick with the decision I made".

You lack existential purpose. Though education is inherently rewarding, these career paths should only be a means to achieve greater goals, not be goals in and of themselves.

This is why you become bored with positions at jobs that most people spend the a large chunk of their livlihood attempting to gain. Don't make the credentials or job title the goal, they're a stepping stone. Find your purpose -- maybe start by asking yourself questions; "what do I want to offer to humanity", "what can I contribute to the greater good". Once you do that, you'll know which career path you'll need to take.

Nice point my friend, thanks for your response.
Perhaps it is one of the reasons I am reading more philosophy books than before... I love philosophy but I was never this serious about it.
About that, I think nearly all of people on the world want justice and peace, no? What am I going to do about peace and justice? I'll try to gather money and help the people. I'd like to teach my ideas to some talented students ,too.
But you clearly have a point... I didn't make my purposes clear.
Do you think I'd better talk to someone (or a specialist) about the propose of my life or I have to find it myself.
The other problem is time... Time is running and I am lost. If I continue like this, I'll end up becoming the worst software engineer that ever lived. Do you think I have enough time to think about the purpose of my life?

Could it be that you get burned out more so than bored? I get interested in a ton of things then drop them the moment I get tired of learning concepts & how to use them.. At the end, all I'm left with is relatively little knowledge to work with & knowing I'll have to face a daunting pile of information, which I've associated with getting burned out, to make something more out of the knowledge I'd gotten. Maybe try something that incorporates two completely different fields so you could hop between the two(if that's feasible)?

Thanks for response my friend. I really appreciate it.
First of all, I don't like those fields; not at all... I love them... I'm not bad in those fields as well. For example : I was chose in my town's chess team, I've already made some android and iOS games.
The problem is that one of them isn't satisfying me at the moment. At school and collage, I could do my homework and had pretty much time for my other interests.
But in the University, things changed: I could no more study lessons so fast (as I did in high school and collage)... Perhaps I had put myself under too much pressure?? I really have no idea about what happened to me and what made me so tired...

It sounds, to me, as if you are a type of person that is 'above' the current education and certification structure. There are people who have almost limitless raw aptitude, who can learn any subject and, most critically, enjoys the pursuit of learning.

In this case, it is best not to think of "what I want to go to school for" - you could go to school for everything, most probably, and never quite feel as if you'd found what you want to do. So, my recommendation is to stop "high-order" education, and instead focus on trade skills. Take some welding, machine tool, electrician, etc type courses (or some other equivalent for other industries), then seek employment within those fields.

Here is the problem I think you are having - the education system simply can't feed you information fast enough to satisfy your rate of learning. Since the education system in many areas is designed to, almost literally, beat information into the heads of people through tedium so that they remember the psychological abuse on prompt, people who 'learn on contact' with a subject are beyond frustrated with a system that is sluggish and tedious.

Pick something that you think you will enjoy working at, get to a point where you can fulfill the hiring requirements, and then go to school only to expand your certifications needed for further jobs. Subjects you are interested in, learn them as hobbies. Order books from the internet, browse the web pages of the internet, tinker and learn on your own in your spare time, or with groups of other hobbyists doing the same thing(s).

I'm not sure how your home country does things, so my advice may not be the best, but from what you are describing, it sounds like you're bored of school and want to actually be able to do something. So, focus on some skill-based courses to kick off a career/resume with, and then go forth into the world. A lot of the world's first university teachers barely went to school, themselves - they were recognized for their achievements in a field and brought into schools to try and pass their methods of achievement on to others.

Thanks very much my friend. You speak as if you had this problem yourself... These idea seems practical.
Do you mind if I contact you about this problem on PM later on?

 

[kimb]

Nice point my friend, thanks for your response.
Perhaps it is one of the reasons I am reading more philosophy books than before... I love philosophy but I was never this serious about it.
About that, I think nearly all of people on the world want justice and peace, no? What am I going to do about peace and justice? I'll try to gather money and help the people. I'd like to teach my ideas to some talented students ,too.
But you clearly have a point... I didn't make my purposes clear.
Do you think I'd better talk to someone (or a specialist) about the propose of my life or I have to find it myself.
The other problem is time... Time is running and I am lost. If I continue like this, I'll end up becoming the worst software engineer that ever lived. Do you think I have enough time to think about the purpose of my life?

Thanks for making it clear; philanthropy and education are not bad goals at all. Narrowing your purpose down to specifics makes the entire process quicker; defining the parameters of what you want to achieve is makes it more tangible.

I can only speak from experience when it comes to defining purpose. In my pursuit of purpose I went about it by surrounding myself with like-minded goal oriented people. I think having a specialist or "mentor" who has good grasp of what it is you want to attain to guide you could only help; I personally didn't have the privilege of having someone mentoring me, so I had to turn to the greats in my field of study who came before me for inspiration and guidance.

When it comes to having enough time to think about your purpose, you have plenty of time, but the question of having enough time to then achieve your purpose is really something only you can answer. You're studying philosophy, so you know that most philosophers spend most of their early life jumping around from interest to interest like you have -- becoming educated through school and life experience for a great number of years, then becoming educators for a great number of years, and eventually writing the great works we've come to know them for. Becoming a Nietzsche or a Tolstoy can't be placed in a time-frame in my opinion.

I do hope you end up finding what you definitively want to accomplish. I've been on the same road, and sometimes still feel like I'm on the same road, but I think we'll all get somewhere eventually.

 

[jimbobbity]

I think the main problem is that things for you become tedious, you aspire to have a great and active life, but doing the same thing over and over (or just gaining other interests) makes you wanna switch paths. I know the feeling, ive been there too.

It seems that you have quite a bit of potential, the things that you wanna do don't always have to be your main goals. E.G you could play chess and make games as a hobby whilst you focus on work earning an income good enough to support yourself, and even if you do switch goals completely you don't have to abandon your previous one altogether Remember we have what, an average of 80 years of life. You have all the time in the world as long as you plan your future and prepare for it. Yes we all want to pursue our goals, but at the end of the day if you find yourself in poverty grades and aspirations don't mean jack.