Seventh Chapter: Ducks and PMS
:Summary of the last chapter:
:Summary of the last chapter:
Luna and Lea were feeling cooped up in the lair, so they decided to steal some money and go shopping. Kisei spotted them leaving and went to tell Hidan. The two ended up in a heated yet hilarious argument and Kisei soon enough went to rat the girl’s out to Pein. Pein informed the boy to tell Hidan to go with Itachi and Kisame to find the girls once the two were back from their mission.
(Continuing where I had left off before~)
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Hidan: "I'm not ****ing spazzing, fish stick," he snarled. "I'm just irritated that we have to go find those stupid whores." Actually, he partially lied there. He was mostly irritated because of Kisei, but Kisame would only make fun of him if he said otherwise so wisely, for once, kept his mouth shut.
Kisame: "Yeah yeah sure," he muttered. "And I'm NOT a ****ing FISH god dammit. I'm a ****ing SHARK. Get it ****ing straight," he snarled. He hated it when people called him a fish. It was one of his.. pet peeves you could say, but it severely irritated him. Pushing past Hidan, he dutifully followed Itachi out of the hideout, scratching his head. "This is stupid. I'd rather them die. I'm tired and I just want to ****ing sleep. Is that too much to ask?" the blue man muttered to himself.
Itachi: “Hidan, you are always spazzing about something. This doesn’t make it any different.” Itachi replied coldly before listening to the blue haired man when he started to complain. “I couldn’t agree more, but these are Pein’s orders. We have to do what he says you know that. The sooner we get the idiots the sooner you can have that nap.” Itachi replied dully as he made a few hand signals as they reached the end of the hallway. Soon enough the rock walls opened and he had stepped outside. “They probably went to that village.” Itachi pointed out with a roll of his eyes.
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Luna: She nodded eagerly and felt herself being pulled along by Lea. "Hm.. I think we should go shopping. Maybe buy some souvenirs for the members so they won't be TOO pissed that we snuck out. ...Though Kakuzu will probably kill us anyway for jacking his money.." she thought aloud. A cold feeling went up her spine as she thought of how unbelievably pissed the zombie man will be at them when they find out. "...Hopefully if the other members come looking for us, Kakuzu won't be one of them," she muttered.
Lea: “Sounds like a dandy idea to me. I already know what I want to get for Tobi and Hidan. I owe Hidan some gel, and I want to get Tobi a rubber duck!” Lea said with a bright smile as she moved a hand to brush some strand of her blonde hair behind her ear. Hearing the comment about Kakuzu it had caused a frown to tug at the corners of her lips. “Yeah…he will be livid. It is too bad since he so far doesn’t have a problem with us. Now…he is sure to have one.” The girl said with a sigh as they passed by a few people when the got further in the village. Seeing a small shop, she had motioned Luna to follow her inside. “Ooh, this shop has a lot of things.” Lea said with a smirk as she glanced around the shop.
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Hidan: "I am not, weasel boy. So shove it up your tight ass before I do it for you," the religious man grumbled, following the other two members. Dealing with Itachi's personality was probably the main reason he would never partner with him. Actually, reason he was paired with Kakuzu at all was because Kakuzu had five different hearts to go through and Hidan couldn't die if Kakuzu got pissed at him. ...As much as he hated the money grubbing bastard, the partnering was actually pretty smart of Pein.
Kisame: Resisting the urge to whine again, as Itachi would probably shoot him that scary cold look he usually did when he got annoyed, he instead sighed heavily. "Well we better find them soon because if we don't, I may just have to use my Samehada on them," he complained half heartedly. He wouldn't really do it since at the moment he was feeling far too lazy, but he knew Hidan would be completely up for the idea of skinning the two alive.
Itachi: “You better rephrase what you just said, or you might regret it.” Itachi replied back bitterly towards the loud mouthed ogre. “We will be able to get them back if the two of you would stop complaining.” God it was like he was around toddlers. Big tall ass toddlers. “Follow me.” Itachi demanded as he teleported off the cliff and into the village.
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Luna: "Oh yeah we kinda ruined his gel with pudding," she laughed. "That was fun.. And why a rubber duck?" she questioned the blonde girl. When they came upon a store, she immediately followed Lea inside and said, "I think I'm gonna get Itachi a stuffed weasel." The girl grinned widely. "And maybe a fish for shark boy. Too bad they didn't have posters of Jaws here or I could buy him that. Lord knows it suits him," she snickered, browsing through the aisles and looking at all the cute little knick knacks they had here.
Lea: “Yes…yes we did. He almost killed me with a pillow too.” Lea said with a nod as her friend laughed. “Hm? Oh! The reason is because Tobi strikes me as a rubber duck kind of person. I’m sure he would love it and use it to annoy Deidara or something. Oh! That reminds me! We can get Deidara clay! Pinnnk clay.” Lea snickered as she walked into the store. “OH! LUNA! I see a fish toy…thingy!” Running over to it, she grabbed it off of a shelf and showed Luna. “It looks like it could spit out water.” Lea laughed.
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Hidan: "Oh? And just WHAT do you think you'll do to me, almighty Uchiha?" he mocked. "I'm ****ing immortal if you don't remember. If anything it's YOU that needs to watch what they say," he threatened, then stopped as he felt an immense killer intent emenating behind him.
Kisame: His eyes narrowed dangerously, his lip curling to show a fantastic row of very sharp teeth. "I wouldn't threaten my partner if I were you. You may be immortal but that doesn't mean it won't hurt when my Samehada runs through you," he replied in a tone cold enough to scare the shit out of any hardened shinobi. Normal shinobi that was.
Itachi: “I may not be able to kill you, but I can find ways to prolong your suffering. Might I remind you of a short blonde haired girl? I’m sure she would --” Itachi was cut off by Kisame threatening Hidan. Itachi felt a smirk curve onto his lips at the shark’s words. Kisame did come in handy that was for sure. Itachi glanced around the area while some people seemed hesitant around them. “Hmm. Where do you suggest we head off to? There are quite a few stores here.” Itachi said as he continued to look around.
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Luna: She giggled insanely. "Oh god, Kisame will be so pissed if we buy him this. Let's buy it," she immediately took hold of the fish and went off in search of a stuffed weasel. Thankfully, she found one. And it was actually kinda cute. "Aw.. This is definitely perfect for him." Picking up the adorable stuffed animal, she squeed silently and hugged it against herself.
Lea: “Haha! Poor fish sticks!” Lea said with a giggle as Luna took the fish from her hands before going off to find other things to buy. Lea had walked around the store some more when she saw a section of clay. There were so many different colors! Seeing a tub of pink clay, she had grabbed it while smirking. “I got the pink clay!” Lea called out to Luna before walking back to Lea. “Aw the stuffed animal is cute!” Lea said with a smile as she saw the weasel in Luna’s arms. Lea was just about to say something when she spotted a section of rubber ducks. “QUACK! I SEE A DUCK! A ****ING DUCK I SAY!” Lea shouted as she ran over to the duck. Grabbing it, she snickered. The shopkeeper looked annoyed by her yelling. Whoops.
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Hidan: He growled audibly and decided not to comment back. He couldn't die, but even he knew that trying to take on two S-class criminals simultaneously was a stupid idea. So, instead, he went with the best response he could possibly give: sulking like a child. Shoving his hands into his pockets, he followed Itachi into the village, scanning the streets for any signs of the two girls.
Kisame: "I say we split up," the man suggested since Hidan was just being a useless lump at the moment. "We'd have a better chance at finding them between the three of us." More like two since Hidan's acting like a spoiled little baby, Kisame thought in annoyance. "There's a lot of stores around here so it would be best this way. Just try not to provoke anyone Hidan," he said exasperatedly towards the silver haired male. "We've seen you do it before and I'd personally rather get the hell out of here as soon as possible without having to clean up one of your messes," the blue man said in a patronizing tone.
Itachi: “Hmm, sounds like a good idea.” Itachi said with a nod as Kisame went off scolding Hidan. Holding in a chuckle, he had turned to face the two of them. “We’ll meet up at this very spot in an hour, ok?” Itachi told them incase it took longer to find the girls. Disappearing from the spot they were at, he headed over to the restaurant area. The girls always seemed hungry…, so they could have gone here.
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Luna: She snickered. "Oh yeah. You wanted to get Tobi a rubber duck. ....Why DID you wanna get him a duckie anyway?" she asked her insane friend. You'd think that simple description would be answer enough, but there were times where there was indeed method behind the madness. So she might have a reason. Maybe. Either way it was still funny.
Lea: The girl had ran back over to Luna after grabbing the rubber ducky. “Huh? Why do I want to get it for him? Well…Tobi strikes me as someone who likes squeaky things.” The girl said with a loud laugh as she squeezed the duck in Luna’s ear. “See! It squeaks! Know what would be funny? When you squeezed the duck and it screamed ‘**** YOU!’ Oh god I would get millions of those and plant them all over the lair.” The blonde haired girl laughed before heading away from Luna to look for some gel for Hidan. It took a few moments of looking around, but she had found some.
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Hidan: He glared evilly at Kisame. "I'm temperamental, not a dumbass, fishboy. I already know we're supposed to be ****ing blending in." He took in Kisame's appearance and snorted. "As if you blend in anyway. You'd fit right in at a sushi bar though. Either way, I'll find them before YOU do," he sneered and turned on his heel towards a selection of knick knack stores.
Kisame: He could feel his blood boiling with fury at his insults and was about to throw some of his own back in Hidan's face, but he left before he even had the chance. "Tch. Typical. I'll kill that ****ing ******* someday, I swear it," the blue man stormed away in the complete opposite direction of Hidan. He ended up near a market like area selling all sorts of trinkets that you wouldn't find in a regular store like beads and an assortment of jewelry. If they were in this crowd, it would be near impossible to find them. He sighed heavily. Great. The best way would be to jump onto one of the roofs to see if he could spot them that way, but he was supposed to be inconspicuous, as inconspicuous as you could be when you had blue skin and gills at least.
Itachi: The raven haired male poked his head inside the restaurant, but he didn’t sense or see the girl’s inside the restaurant. A lot of people had given him a strange look since…he was looking like some peeping tom. Turning around on his heel, he took off and headed in another direction.
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Luna: She started laughing hysterically. "Oh god that'd be so funny! At least half the members would end up getting annoyed though. I think Hidan would like it." She shook her head and said, "We should probably pay for this stuff now." Walking up to the counter, dragging Lea by the wrist, she put all of their stuff on the counter. The cashier scanned the bar codes and prices popped up on the register. When he told me the amount, I reached into my pocket and pulled out a wad of bills. "Uhh.. I'm not sure about the currency so you'll have to forgive me for my incompetence here. You wouldn't mind counting it up would you? Just so long as you don't swindle me. I'll ask a local here if you really want that." She narrowed her eyes at him and the cashier blinked, looking back at her with a dead pan expression. "I'm not gonna swindle ya, calm down." The man looked down at the wad of bills on the counter and counted through them, grabbing what was necessary and put them into the register, taking out a few coins and putting them into Luna's outstretched palm. "There ya go. Need a bag for everything?" She nodded and he grabbed a brown paper bag with handles and stuffed everything inside. "There. Have a nice day." "Thanks, you too." Grabbing the remaining bills off the counter, she stuffed them into her pocket.
Hidan: He ducked his head into one of the stores and looked around. Seeing as he was so tall, it wouldn't be difficult to spot Luna or Lea in the store. Unfortunately, he didn't spot them in the store he was looking into. Scowling, he walked into the next one, moving a curtain aside that had been placed there instead of a door. His eyes widened when he ended up going into a lingerie store. He felt eyes of many of the women in the store glaring at him evilly and he walked out as quickly as possible "Jashin-sama women are scary.." He glanced back at the store and shook his head, going into the store next to it.
Kisame: Scratching his head, he sighed. "Guess it can't be helped." Moving into an alley, he pushed chakra into the soles of his feet, bent his knees, and jumped as high as possible, landing nimbly on the roof. Now that he had a decent vantage point, he scanned the area, finding hide nor hair of the girls. "Fantastic," he grumbled. "I hope Itachi's having better luck than I am because I ain't seein' shit." He sat down on the roof and kept his eyes on the market square, feeling relaxed but also alert in case he managed to spot them.
Lea: The blonde haired girl had let out a small sound when her friend had grabbed her by the wrist. When Luna took her items and set them onto the counter, she watched as Luna went to pay for the little things they had gotten some members. “Dude…I so want to play with that clay. I might keep it to myself…” Lea laughed as she blinked when Luna told the guy not to swindle her. That was such a funny word. So, being the dumbass she was, she started to speak. “YEAH! Or I’ll swindle your ass!” That didn’t make much sense, but it pleased her by saying it. The male had given her a strange look before glancing back to Luna. Once everything was paid for, she smiled at Luna. “NOW! Off we go to buy ourselves some goodies!” Lea grabbed her friend’s hand as she made her way to the door. However…before she could make her way outside, she had bumped into someone HARD and released Luna’s hand as she fell onto the floor. “OW! ****!!!” Moving her hands to her head, she whined as she rubbed it. Glancing up to see the person she bumped into, she had then felt her face turn pale. Oh ****ing A!! It was Hidan! Why couldn’t it have been Tobi? A hobo? SATAN HIMSELF!?
Itachi: The raven haired male had searched multiple stores and just about everything, but there wasn’t any sign of the girls. However…there was a tall blue man on top of some roof. Disappearing from where he was, he had teleported so he was now besides Kisame. “No luck either? I’m starting to question if they even came here. I wouldn’t be surprised if someone locked them in the closet at the base and assumed they went outside…” Itachi said with a roll of his eyes.
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Luna: She felt her own face turning pale as she came face to face with a very livid Hidan. She could practically feel the killing intent coming off of him in waves. "Uh.. uh.. nice ninja?" she said sheepishly, backing away while holding her arms out in front of her, palms up as if in a peace gesture. “LOOK WE GOT BORED OKAY IT'S NOT OUR FAULT!" she whined. "You guys were gone and we had nothing to do so we.. thought.. it'd be a great idea.. to go shopping.." she finished lamely.
Hidan: His pissed off expression switched from the girl lying at his feet to other girl backing away. His arm shot out and he grabbed her by the neck, shoving her against one of the shelves. "Do you have any ****ing idea how long it took me to ****ing find you? Do you?! How much ****ing trouble it took us to even SEARCH for you? Itachi and fishboy are out looking for you right now and just imagine how PISSED they will be when they find you," he seethed, his grip on Luna's neck tightening.
Kisame: "If that were the case, Pein wouldn't have sent us on a wild goose chase. I know he likes to yank our balls once in a while, but even he wouldn't go this far so he must've gotten the information from someone he actually trusts to tell the truth.They're here. I just have no ****ing idea where," he frowned, jumping off the roof. Looking back up, he called to Itachi, "Let's just go find Hidan. I sense his chakra nearby."
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Lea: The girl had sat up slowly when she noticed Hidan’s pink angry eyes glancing Luna’s way. Lea wanted to giggle at Luna’s comment, but Hidan had charged after her and…shoved her against a shelf. People around them scurried away, and she felt herself panic in a way. Standing up quickly, she ran over to Hidan and tried to pry his arm off of Luna, but failed in the process. “HIDAN! LET HER GO! You act like we killed one of your members!--Like that would ever happen, but let her go!!” Lea whined, but ended up letting go of his arm when an idea struck her. Looking around the room she had then noticed the bag on the ground due to the fact Luna dropped it after Hidan grabbed her. Running over towards it, she grabbed Hidan’s gel out from it. Running back up to him, she started to pout. “…We wanted…to get you guy’s presents, and since I owed you gel I wanted to get you some” Offering it to the male, she frowned. “Now let Luna bun go, ok? Pleasseee? We are sorry.”
Itachi: “…Thanks for that mental image I did not need.” Itachi said as he shuddered at Kisame’s choice of words. “Hm, probably.” Itachi agreed with Kisame before jumping off the roof when the other suggested to look for Hidan. “For some reason I have a feeling wherever Hidan is…the girls are.” Itachi said with a sigh.
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Luna: She was slowly beginning to feel her lungs emptying of much needed oxygen as Hidan's choke hold tightened on her neck. "Can't.. breathe.. dammit.." Her legs were dangling an inch off the ground and she found that this little fact only seemed to intensify the fact that Hidan was currently strangling her. She only hoped to god that he would listen to Lea and let her go but it didn't seem like that was happening..
Hidan: His eyes narrowed towards Lea and he could feel his resolve slipping. But then remembering Kisei's taunting began to piss him off again and he felt his anger returning. "**** no. I don't care about the ****ing gel right now. I'm ****ing pissed because I JUST got back from a mission. I'm ****ing tired. And I did NOT want to ****ing deal with this! And it's your ****ing fault! So you get to watch your ****ing friend while I ****ing STRANGLE her!" he snarled.
Kisame: "Maybe, I dunno though." Mentally he was thinking, I'll be pissed if that ******* finds them before we do since he was being such a baby earlier. Much to his surprise, Itachi was correct. When they found Hidan in a knick knack store, Lea was trying to pry Hidan's hands off of Luna's neck, who was currently turning blue due to lack of oxygen. "Oh shit," he muttered. "Hidan! Let her go already it ain't worth it!"
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Lea: The girl felt her eyes widen big when Hidan didn’t give two shits that she got him gel and continued to rant. What was so bad in going shopping?? Hidan acted like it took him five ****ing hundred years to find them!! God maybe Jashin-sama was pmsing all over Hidan. “Dude! Hidan! Do you really think killing a ****ing human is worth it? So stop acting like some old woman who just started menopause!!” Lea cried out, but to her shock there was a voice. Turning her head to the side she had noticed Kisame coming in and trying to pull Hidan off Luna. “YAY! SHARKY!”
Itachi: The male followed Kisame into some store and once he stepped inside he noticed Hidan strangling Luna while Lea was shouting. Itachi watched as Kisame went over to try and pry Hidan off, but without saying a word, he had appeared besides Kisame and had successfully yanked Hidan’s hands away from Luna’s neck. As the girl began to fall, he caught her. “Hidan this is NOT what Pein told us to do. If you would have killed this girl your temperamental ass would be screwed. You need to watch yourself before I report you to Pein. Yes they are idiots for leaving and I’m not so cheery about it, but it doesn’t mean we should strangle them for it.” Itachi scolded as his eyes narrowed dangerously at Hidan. Looking down at Luna, he sighed as her face returned back to its normal shade. Setting her down to her feet slowly, he blinked. “Are you ok?”
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Luna: She felt like she could collapse from the amount of relief that overwhelmed her, though it might also have to do with the oxygen depravation she just experienced. Chest heaving as she gulped in the air like her life depended on it (since it did anyway), her hand went to her neck and she winced as she found it to be tender. It would definitely bruise. Leaning against Itachi for support since her legs currently couldn't hold her up, she muttered hoarsely, "Thanks. And I think I'll be okay."
Hidan: He could feel his blood boiling. "Why the **** do we need them anyway? They're ****ing useless! They sit around and do absolutely ****ing nothing except drive the rest of us crazy! Leader doesn't even interrogate them anymore because they make a ****ing JOKE out of it! So how the **** do you think I feel that I have to come rescue two stupid cunts who couldn't ****ing stay put when they have nothing to offer the Organization anyway?!"
Kisame: "Look Hidan. You're pissed. I'm pissed too. I'd like to strangle the two myself," he said looking towards the two girls, "but I don't because that's not for me to decide. LEADER is in charge. LEADER makes the decision whether they live or die.Not you. So chill the **** out dude and stop making it into such a big ****ing deal."
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Lea: The blonde haired girl watched as Itachi had then suddenly showed up and managed to pull Luna from Hidan’s grip. About ****ing time! She did not want a dead Luna! No she did not! Lea kept her eyes on her friend when she was able to breathe again. Her eyes had then darted over to each male as they all started to rant. Whining, she ran over to the bag once more, grabbed the fish toy and the weasel stuffed animal and handed the items to each male. “Stop all of this whining! We only left to have fun and buy you guys things! Luna got you a stuffed weasel Itachi, and a fish that squirts water for you Kisame! They didn’t have…any sharks.” Lea nodded before shoving the gel to Hidan. “Even though you don’t deserve the ****ing gel…take it!”
Itachi: As much as he agreed with Hidan about the girls being useless…Pein wanted them around. Whatever Pein says goes and that was that. His eyes went down to Luna when she said she would be alright. “Good. Now I hope this will be a warning to you girls. At least inform one of the members before you suddenly take off.” Itachi said with a sigh before making a face when a stuffed weasel was shoved into his hands. …Luna got this for him? “…A weasel…?” Itachi asked as he felt his left eye twitch.
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Luna: She grimaced. "Sorry. We didn't know if you'd agree with us leaving or not so we just went ahead and did it anyway." Massaging her neck, she watched as Itachi held the stuffed weasel in his hands. Stifling a snicker, she said with a cheery grin,"It fit so I thought you might like it. Besides, it's cute."
Hidan: He felt the gel being shoved into his hands and he stared at the bottle. It was actually better quality than what he usually got because Kakuzu was such a cheap ass that he wouldn't let the immortal get anything else. Feeling guilty, but not wanting to let go of his pride, he said with a nasty, gruff tone, "Thanks." Inwardly he was grateful and felt even worse for acting this way. He sighed and pocketed the gel, resolving to make it up to Lea for acting like such an ass, even if he wouldn't admit out loud to anyone. Ever.
Kisame: "All right, show's over guys," he glared at the civilians who had gathered around the store to watch They went away, grumbling but satisfied that there was at least a little excitement in their otherwise dull lives. "You, tubby," the blue man pointed his finger at a stout little man who still had his face pressed against the glass window. "Beat it," he snarled. The man backed away with a scared expression then waddled away from the store. Sighing heavily for what felt like the millionth time that day, he said to the four of them, "Let's get back guys. I'm exhausted."
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Lea: Lea had snickered towards Itachi when he had made a strange little look when he was given the weasel. Her green eyes gazed back over to Hidan when he had thanked her. “Uh huh.” Lea said with a roll of her eyes before glancing at Kisame when he had started to shoo people away who were watching them like they were some kind of soap opera. Once everyone cleared out Lea had blinked. “Ok! Lead the way Fish s--Kisame!” Lea said as she wrapped her arm around the blue male. He got really angry when being called that name, so she figured it would be best if she didn’t piss him off anymore than he already was.
Itachi: “Well next time ask one of us before you go running off.” Itachi said before making a face at Luna and Lea when they both started to snicker at him. “…” Shoving the weasel into his robe, he sighed. “We need to get back.” Itachi said before he started to head out of the store. He just wanted a nap…ugh.
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Luna: Following Itachi out of the store, she looked up at him. "Hey, I know you guys aren't happy about having to look for us and everything but we really don't feel like going back up that stupid cliff so.. could you like.. teleport us back to the lair?" she asked meekly. She was pretty sure they all wanted to get back as quickly as possible because she could sense they were all tired. It probably explained why Hidan was so cranky, but then again he was always cranky.
Hidan: Following the rest of them out of the store with a sulky expression on his face, he glanced over at Luna and grimaced at how her neck was beginning to turn purple. Shit. Pein would probably notice that and ask how it happened. That wouldn't be easy to explain.. Again that feeling of guilt churned his stomach and he voiced his own opinion to Luna's idea, "I kinda like the sound of that myself, I'm ****ing tired," he muttered.
Kisame: He was about to glare at Lea for calling him a fish when she suddenly cut herself off and called him by his regular name. He could feel his eyebrows disappear into his hairline. Damn, did Lea actually have common sense? It shocked him. She probably did, it just had a tendency to go into hiding until it was truly needed. Either way, he felt appreciative of it. "Yeah I think that's a good idea. I'd like to get back as quickly as possible if that's all right with you, Itachi," he looked over towards the usually stoic Uchiha.
Itachi: The male had stopped walking when Luna had suggested that they teleport their way back to the lair. The hill was a pain in the ass and the last thing he wanted as the girls to go tumbling down the hill when trying to go up. It would be amusing to see…, but he was tired…not in the best of moods and he was carrying a stupid stuffed animal around. “Alright.” Was his only response to everyone. Doing a few hand signals, he had made it so that he had teleported them all back into the den. “There.”
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(( End of chapter~ ;D I hoped you enjoyed it.))
