Ninth Chapter: Salty Watermelons & The Insanity Rumor
:Summary of the last chapter:
:Summary of the last chapter:
In the previous chapter Lea went to return the leftover money back to Kakuzu‘s hiding spot. She and Hidan got into a weird discussion about gay man hard-ons and Chocolate covered dead cats. Anyways one the more SANE side of things Itachi and Luna got into a stuffed weasel fight. Actually…that isn‘t really sane either. I think all of these characters are smoking something. Who is the blame? Two girls rping near 4 am in the morning that is who.
(Continuing where I had left off before~)
---
Luna: "It's weird because it just doesn't seem like you. At least.. what I've seen from you," the girl stared at him strangely. "Especially that hit. That was.. more playful than anything. Which is why it seems so.. odd." Feeling a pouty scowl form upon her face, she retorted, "I am not over thinking things! And could you.. maybe make me something too?" The girl followed him into the kitchen.
Hidan: "You sure act like you are," the male deadpanned. Feeling a sudden urge to smack her, he resisted and decided swearing at her would be better. "Stop CALLING me Mr. ****ing--wait did you just say dead chocolate covered cats?" he stopped in the middle of his sentence, not even listening to the rest of what she was saying. "Where the **** in your mind did that disturbing idea come from?"
---
Itachi: The raven haired shinobi simply ignored Luna’s comment and let out a grunt of annoyance she had spoken. Make her something to eat? Pft. “Why should I have to make you something to eat? You have hands, so you are capable of making something yourself.” Itachi told the woman with a roll of his eyes as he opened the fridge to grab a piece of watermelon from the top shelf. Since someone had already cut it into pieces on a plate, he didn’t need to do much. Shutting the fridge with his foot, he had walked to the counter to grab the salt. Itachi dabbed some of the substance on the fruit before setting the saltshaker down.
Lea: “I do NOT!” Lea whined as she stomped her foot against the floor as if she was throwing a tantrum. The girl blinked at Hidan when he had started to yell at her, but stopped himself before questioning her about the chocolate covered dead cats. “Yes I did, why?” The blonde haired girl asked before laughing when Hidan had given her a look. “How should I know? It is like the people in my brain type out things for me to say, and…I say them!” Lea laughed before placing both hands on her hips. “Hehe…chocolate covered dead cats…hehe.”
---
Luna: "Aww, but you're probably a much better cook than I am!" she said brightly, trying to sweet-talk him into making something for her. Staring as he grabbed a couple slices of watermelon, her stare only turned into astonishment and confusion as he began to pour salt over it. "You put salt on your watermelon? Ew, you freak," the girl said with an odd expression on her face.
Hidan: He stared at her weirdly. "And people say I'm the psychotic one.." the male muttered. "Apparently they've never met you." Though he was beginning to wonder if the dead chocolate covered cats thing ended up being a result of her confusion in thinking that he was going to get Luna a chocolate covered cat in compensation. Where the **** the dead part came in, he wasn't sure of however.
---
Itachi: The raven haired male had taking a bite out of his slice of watermelon as Luna had spoken. The swallowed the pieces of watermelon down before scoffing at her. “Don’t call me a freak when you haven’t tried it.” The male said before allowing a smirk to fall on his lips. “Go try one, you never know…you might actually like it.”
Lea: “I am not psychotic! Stop calling me names a person would call someone in an insane asylum!” The girl whined as she walked over to his bed to grab a pillow to throw at him. However, she missed and ended up hitting the closet door. “**** me…” Lea groaned as she face palmed.
---
Luna: She continued to stare at him and folded her arms over her chest. Moving her gaze to the salted watermelon on the table, she hesitated. Then, hardening her resolve, she strode over to Itachi, grabbed a piece of his watermelon and chomped on it. Her eyes widened. Bringing the watermelon up to eye level, she almost began to admire it. "That's.. amazing.." the girl muttered in awe.
Hidan: "Why? It's where you belong," he said teasingly. He watched her with careful eyes as she grabbed one of the pillows on the bed and attempted to throw it at him. Key word here being 'attempted' as she missed him by practically a mile. Snickering as the pillow hit the closet a few feet away from him, his eyes widened at her next comment. Bad choice of words, Lea. With a sudden smirk, he backed her against the wall using his body to guide the girl and held his arms out on either side of her. He bent his mouth close to her ear and asked in a playful, seductive manner, "Would you like me to?"
---
Itachi: Itachi tore his eyes away from the short girl as he went to take another bite out of the watermelon. However before he could take another bite the fruit was snatched from him. Itachi gazed up at the girl with narrowed eyes as she took a bite out of the fruit. “I told you.” He scoffed as he snatched the watermelon out of her hands after she had taken a bite. “…Actually, keep it.” Itachi shoved it back into her hands before going back to get another piece.
Lea: The girl had sighed and was about to go get the pillow and try again, but Hidan got closer. “What are you--GAH!” Lea yelped when she was suddenly backed against the wall with Hidan hovering over her like some gorilla in mating season. The blonde haired girl squirmed a little at the touch of his hot breath against his ear. Her eyes widened at his words before she attempted to push him away. “Oh **** off! God you are such a horny gorilla!!” Lea whined as she continued to try and get past him, but failed.
---
Luna: The girl grinned like a cat who'd gotten the cream at the look on his face as she took a bite out of his watermelon. She was a bit surprised when he tried to take it back and stared at him. What, was he going to eat it? He seemed to realize this and gave it back to her. Holding in her laughter, she satisfied herself by happily munching on the remains of the watermelon.
Hidan: Chuckling softly, he replied in a soft tone, "You know you like it, Lea." Of course, he sort of ruined the whole thing by grinning like an idiot, but hell, he hadn't had this much fun since.. Jashin knows when. Everyone seemed out to annoy or bother him, but for once, he had the pleasure of simultaneously being a complete pervert and making someone else extremely uncomfortable. It was very satisfying.
Kakuzu: After returning from a long mission, all he wanted to do was crash. So, with this in mind, he entered the hideout and went straight to the room he shared with his annoying partner Hidan. Upon entering, he turned his head to see the silver haired male cornering the blonde in what appeared to be a very suggestive manner. Sighing heavily, realizing he wasn't about to get sleep any time soon, he drawled, "If you're going to do that here, please do me a favor and don't make a mess." Turning on his heel, he exited the room feeling mildly irritated.
-----
Itachi: Itachi felt his left eye twitch at her laughter, but simply grabbed another piece of watermelon. “You are amused too easily.” Itachi commented as he put some salt on the watermelon before taking a big bite. The Uchiha walked over to a chair before plopping down into it. Itachi was about to make another comment when he sensed Kakuzu’s chakra. “Kakuzu is on his way here.” The male said before leaning back in the chair.
Lea: The girl felt her eyes glare up at Hidan as he had spoken in a soft…and pedophile like tone. “ME? Like it? You are the one who is grinning and pinned ME to the wall. Ya kn--” Lea was cut off when the door to the bedroom had been pushed open. The girl felt her face flush a little when Kakuzu spotted them before making a…comment. OH GOD! “STITCHES! IT ISN--” It was too late, he was out of the room with the impression that they were going to do something naughty. If anything Hidan was going to try and rape her. “Hidan step away from the psycho woman.” Lea demanded as she tried to move her head away from his. God this was too close for comfort.
---
Luna: She grinned and replied, "Yeah. I know. But life isn't fun if you don't laugh once in a while." The girl thought for a moment and then said teasingly, "It's probably why you have those lines on your face, Mr. Weasel. I believe they call them 'stress lines.'" She snickered. A curious look came into her expression when she heard Kakuzu was here. "Huh. I wonder what the Patchmaster wants?"
Hidan: He gaped at the implications behind his partner's comment. Stringing a bunch of unintelligible words together to form some sort of gibberish in response, he smacked his palm against his head. "That wasn't supposed to happen. It was only supposed to be a ****ing joke..." he whined.
Kakuzu: He entered the kitchen and his eyes focused on the two people currently eating. Sighing heavily, he went into the fridge and grabbed a bowl with chopped pork liver then threw it into the microwave. Glancing towards Luna and Itachi, he warned them, "If you wish you retain your sanity you will not go near my room."
----
Itachi: “I don’t need to have fun, Luna.” Itachi said with a grunt before letting his eyes glance at the kitchen entrance when Kakuzu finally came inside. Itachi remained as the zombie man went to get some food from the fridge. The Uchiha had raised a brow when the man turned to look at them before warning them about his room. “Why is that…?” Itachi asked curiously even though deep down inside he wished he did not ask the man. Ugh who knows what could be going on in that room with Hidan and Lea. “Is Lea dead?” Itachi asked as he tried to hide his amusement.
Lea: The blonde haired girl gazed up at Hidan when he had face palmed. Lea ducked under his other arm and fled from the room. “YOU WILL NOT RAPE ME!” She called back to Hidan as she darted down the hallway and ran into the kitchen. Lea stopped while placing both hands on her knees as she started to pant. Gahh!
Luna: She rolled her eyes. "Yes you do. You need something to make you happy or you'll rot away in misery in this place," the girl said. Turning her attention to Kakuzu, she watched as he pulled something out of the fridge and grimaced as she realized what it was. Sticking her tongue out in disgust, she mimed retching off to the side and stopped when she heard Kakuzu's comment. She was about to question why when Itachi responded and, crying out in angry protest, snarled, "She better not be or I'll kill that stupid bastard. I don't care if he can't die, I WILL find a way to kill him."
Hidan: "Hey, Lea, wait a minute! I wasn't going to ****ing rape you, dumbass!" he called after the girl and tried to catch her. Unfortunately she ended up dodging into the kitchen and, unless he was mistaken, that was exactly where Kakuzu was. ****.
Kakuzu: Raising a brow, he shrugged his shoulders. "How the hell should I know? I don't think Hidan usually sacrifices the women he ends up in bed with, but then again, with his ****ing weird religion, even that's questionable." A sound of hurried footsteps sounded in his ears and he turned around to see Lea red-faced and panting. "Finished already? That was quick."
---
Itachi: The raven haired male allowed his eyes to glance over at Luna when she got angry at the thought of Lea being dead. “Even if he couldn’t die I highly doubt you would be able to kill him.” The male said with a roll of his eyes before looking back at Kakuzu. Itachi replayed Kakuzu’s comment in his head before shuddering at the thought of Hidan and Lea…together. “I have simply lost my appetite.” Itachi rose from the chair and went to toss the watermelon out as Lea rushed into the kitchen. Itachi gave her questioning look as she panted.
Lea: Lea had finished panting and slowly stood up just in time to hear Kakuzu’s question. “Eh? Finished what--OH GOD! We didn’t do anything! He pinned ME to the wall! The man was going to rape shitless!” Lea yelled as she went to poke Kakuzu in the arm.
---
Luna: She glanced over at Itachi and put her index finger to her lips saying, "Shhh. You're ruining my plans." As soon as she heard Kakuzu's comment, she turned her attention to the den, which led to the hallway and was about to charge through, screaming, "DON'T WORRY Lea I'LL SAVE YOUUUU" when she ran smack into said blonde, knocking them both over. Seeing the girl, she hugged her tightly and cried dramatically, "LEA YOU'RE ALIVE! If that bastard raped you I'll cut his **** off."
Hidan: At Kakuzu's comment, he rushed into the kitchen and yelled, "God dammit we didn't do anything! And I was not going to ****ing rape you, Lea so shut the fuc--" The man paled at Luna's comment and backed away with a startled look. Ninja or not, women were ****ing scary when they were pissed.
Kakuzu: The male glanced over at Hidan then to Lea. Rolling his eyes, he said, "Whatever. Deny it all you want. I don't really care." Taking his bowl of pork liver out of the microwave, he grabbed a fork from one of the drawers then set out into the den
to eat.
---
Itachi: “What plans?” Itachi asked with a scoff before making a face when Lea claimed that Hidan was going to rape her. Seconds later Luna had ran into the girl and the two had fallen to the floor. “You guys are --” Itachi stopped when Hidan came inside the kitchen. “I’m going to watch TV.” Ignoring the three idiots, he had stormed out of the kitchen and headed inside the den.
Lea: The blonde was about to say another word when Luna had ran into her and caused her to fall down. “OW!” Lea cried out as she rubbed her head with a pouty expression on her lips. “Of course I am alive--hehe, you better. IF there is any **** to cut off anyways.” Lea teased before glancing up when she heard Hidan’s voice. Whoops. “LIES!! You so were! You randomly pinned me to the wall and started to whisper sweet nothings in my ear!!” The girl whined as she stood up as she pouted at him.
---
Luna: "Finish that sentence, Itachi, I dare ya!" she growled after him then turned her attention to Lea. Grimacing, she got up off her friend and said sheepishly, "Sorry. I didn't mean to knock you over." Helping her to her feet, she pointed her finger in a menacing manner at Hidan. "You better not have done anything Mr. Zombieman or I'mma use your own scythe on your stupid ass!"
Hidan: Sighing heavily, he rubbed the bridge of his nose in irritation and snapped, "It was a ****ing JOKE, Lea for Jashin's sake. I just wanted to have a little fun in teasing you. ****ing hell man, is it illegal to even crack a joke now?"
----
Tobi: The swirly masked man had skipped his way into the den when he noticed Kakuzu and Itachi entering inside it. “OH! Tobi has a secret to tell you!” The male cheered before motioning them to come closer. “I was talking to Noru a moment ago, and she said she saw Hidan and Lea getting friendly. Tobi thinks they might be secret lovers!” This of course was Tobi’s version of what Noru said.
Kakuzu: "Go away, Tobi, we don't give a shit and we already know. Now leave us in peace, I'd like to eat my dinner without being annoyed," the male grumbled.
Itachi: The male had rolled his eyes towards the masked man as he told them about Hidan and Lea. He was really getting stick and tired of hearing about this. “Tobi, go bother someone else.” This of course caused Tobi to whine and flee the area. Itachi sat down on the couch when he noticed the stuffed weasel on the floor. Gah…
Tobi: “Why do you have to be so mean to Tobi?” He whined, but left the den anyways when Itachi had spoken. The man made his way into the kitchen and had gasped when he saw Lea and Hidan. Oh! He must tell Luna! “Luna! I have something to tell you!” Tobi grabbed her arm and pulled her outside the kitchen as he moved a hand to her ear as he whispered. “Noru told me she saw Hidan and Lea getting friendly. I think they are dating!”
-----
Lea: Lea was about to say something to Hidan, but Luna had beaten her to it and threatened the man. Hehe. “She sooo would too!” The blonde haired girl said with a smirk before narrowing her eyes at Hidan. “No it isn’t illegal, but you PINNED ME! It didn’t seem like a joke to me.” Lea shouted before slapping him in the chest. “Don’t you have something to do anyways?” Lea hinted as she slapped him in the chest again while wiggling her eyebrows.
Luna: The girl was suddenly yanked out of the kitchen by an unexpected force which ended up being a boy in a swirly orange mask. Blinking, she looked at Tobi in confusion when he said he had something to tell her. When he said his bit, she nearly laughed. "Lea? And Hidan? Dating? Pshhh. Fat chance."
Hidan: "It was a ****ing joke, dammit! I was KIDDING. Do you really think I'd actually **** you, Lea?" he rolled his eyes. "Seriously. That's the most idiotic idea I've heard of yet. Ow," he glared at her as he she kept slapping his torso. She was about to smack him again when he grabbed her wrist and growled irritatedly, "Do you mind? And where the **** else would I have to be?"
-----
Kakuzu: He glanced up at Itachi and noticed his expression. "Something wrong?" Following the male's gaze, he came upon a stuffed animal shaped like a weasel at Itachi's feet. Raising a brow, he asked, "Where the hell did that come from?"
Itachi: “Nothing--” Itachi stopped when Kakuzu asked where the stuffed weasel came from. Great the last thing he wanted to do was to tell Kakuzu. Then again it wasn’t like ‘he’ took the money. “Luna bought it for me.” Itachi said with a roll of his eyes.
-----
Tobi: The male had blinked under his masked when Luna laughed at him. “B-But Noru wouldn’t lie! It is true! I mean those two are always together when she isn’t with you! Tobi thinks they are just pretending to hate each other so no one would notice.” The boy said with continuous nod.
Luna: While it was true that Noru would never lie due to her immensely innocent personality, she just didn't believe Lea and Hidan would ever be a couple. No way. "She wouldn't lie, true, but it might've just been a misunderstanding. And the only reason she's around him so much when she's not with me is because Hidan's a fun person to annoy," the girl grinned. "She wouldn't pretend to hate someone to keep it a secret. If she acts like she hates someone.. then she hates that person. No exceptions."
------
Lea: “No. It is more like do you think I would ever **** you? You would probably hump anyone with boobs and a pretty little face.” Lea said with a huff before letting out a cry when he had grabbed her wrist. “Ow! That hurts you **** ass!” Lea cried as she tried to free her wrist from his grasp. Grunting, she had rolled her eyes when Hidan had spoken. “I thought you were going to get me a cat and find Luna’s cat? God you are so retarded!”
Hidan: "Tch, you probably would. After all, who wouldn't want to **** someone as sexy as me?" he said, nodding his head in agreement with his comment. It may sound completely narcissistic but no one could deny how incredibly attractive he was. Upon hearing Lea's next comment, he bristled. "I would not. That'd make me a manwhore, which I'm not." Realizing he was hurting her with his tight grip on her wrist, he released her immediately. "Uh.. my bad," the male muttered. ...Oh. The cats. Right. He forgot about that. Growling, he said nastily, "Well forgive me for having a shitty memory. With that kind of attitude, maybe I WON'T get you a ****ing cat."
---
Kakuzu: At the mention of the word bought, he immediately snapped to attention. Eyes narrowing, he asked in a low, dangerous tone, "And just where the **** did she get the money to buy such a thing?" If she went into his stash..
(End~ XD I ended it here since this is as far as me and my friend got. Lol)
