Western Marriage Tradition

[Cunning Linguist]

Ah. I got a question. How can you rape a chick if she don't want it? like how can you be turn on by a chick who don't wanna have ***? Don't you have any shame? There are time when I want to treat a female like a piece of meat but she gotta be into it. I can't do that to people who are not into it. It just wrong.

Dunno. Never done it

 

[Pumpkin Ninja]

Dunno. Never done it

My whole life is a lie...

 

[Nagi]

Dunno. Never done it

ah, I was under the impression that you is that guy. My apologies. XD

 

[Pyro NB]

The concept of marriage is good but the legal portion of it is crap. Truthfully I would rather my girlfriends be my gf so that way is some crap goes down we can split without all the drama. Also believe that if a girl wants the dream wedding why not just buy her a ring, have a wedding, and legally change her last name without potentially signing your life away? Because 50% divorce rate aren't good odds.

 

[Cunning Linguist]

My whole life is a lie...

Join the club. My mother told me that I'm handsome. I've come to realize that she's bias

 

[Power Bottom]

I think marriage is a beautiful thing.

*waits for my ring*

 

[Aim64C]

What do you think about the traditional engagement procedure(man gets expensive ring),divorce, court bias and all the aspects of western marriage.
I wanna read all perspectives

Well, it worked pretty well for at least a few hundred years.

Granted, it wasn't always the tradition to get an engagement ring, and in many cases, marriage rings were not financially practical until years into the marriage.

Of course, courtship practices were different then, too. Even if premarital *** was likely higher than social stigma would insist, cohabitation prior to marriage was much more rare. Women often remained at home, or close to home and only left home after finding a man she was comfortable enough with to marry after a substantial period of dating (several months to a few years).

When partners decide to co-habitate too early in the relationship, it makes it much more difficult to break up. It isn't necessarily the case that "modern" people are any less frivolous in their courtship mentalities - it is simply that they have disregarded the procedure that served for hundreds of years (if not thousands) to make it easier for a romantically involved couple to disengage from a relationship that wasn't working.

If you move in with someone, you share bills, often share sleeping quarters, share responsibilities, etc. This makes it very difficult if the person who was really amazing and awesome 3 months ago is now not really what you were looking for. If you break up, you've got to go figure out some other place to stay (or... ... figure out how to stay with that person... ), may have to stretch your pay or dig into savings until a room mate can be located. You've got to sort through who-bought-what and all manner of other things.

Even if these are done without drama and violence, it is still a very emotional and stressful process.

Many choose to get married, not necessarily too soon - but after the two already feel rather 'stuck' with each other. May as well get the tax break for it, right?

This leads to high incidence of divorce.

Further reinforcing the trend toward divorce are various concepts that have arisen from the court system. Since men, historically, have been the 'bread winners' of a family, courts have seen fit to require a man to pay benefits to a woman should they separate in marriage.

This is an absolutely tragic story:

You must be registered for see links

" He flipped the page, his hands shaking. The judge had awarded permanent alimony.

"My alimony obligation is $1,500," Terry said. But Murielle would owe him $525 a month in child support for their son.

And Murielle was to pay the outstanding bills of her former attorney, Thacker, and her former forensic accountant — a combined $150,486.

Terry smiled, satisfied. He was finally divorced.

Five years, four judges, six lawyers, $400,000 in attorney and expert fees and costs, a child yanked back and forth, the petty arguing — all for a net payment of about $1,000 a month.

...

She said the legal system had failed her. I was struck by the irony. Both Terry and she felt the system had failed them. Neither supposedly had money left to pay each other or their attorneys. And now she was complaining about legal fees. That was new. Divorced, the two of them again had something in common. "

The problem is that you can't have your cake and eat it, too.

The traditional concept of dating and marriage arose out of the need to protect the interests of the family unit. Women are best served by a stable husband and men are best served by a stable woman - both of whom are best capable of providing for and caring for children.

When you begin to disregard portions of this procedure, or when you begin to try and produce a lack of consequence for being unstable - then you disregard thousands of years that these systems had to be developed under ongoing trial.

That doesn't mean that it is absolutely important to have a wedding in a church, or that the dress be white - or other things like that... but that the overall process has its merits and practical function within the context of human behavioral patterns.

It developed the way it did for a reason.

 

[BlazeRelease]

Being gay, I don't think the traditional marriage suits me very well.

Though the traditional marriage is too... Traditional. Men should not be buying women rings anymore; that was a custom because only men had money... Now women can work all or most jobs and make money like men so... It's just outdated and in women's favor for no reason.

Also, while I think that no one should ever worry about or prepare for divorce, since such thoughts clearly show a lack of will to 100% fully commit, it is however HEAVILY in woman's favor, prepared to baby them through the rest of their lives, even though, again, such legalities are unnessecary since woman can make a living now.

Marriage needs an overhaul.

 

[paratise]

Divorces happen because people break up. Like how they break up from bfs/gfs. It is not more sacred than love itself it is a legal commitment. There is nothing much romantic about it; it was basicly a person trade from family to spouse until recent century. I find rings annoying, but that's my opinion. Diamonds are harmful for many people who work like slaves to dig them out, they are not best friends they are nicely organized carbons and should be taken out respectful to human rights and used for science purposes. Such a waste.

Divorce rates are scary as teenages' and YA's fast paced break up rates. Getting old and feeling obligated is what holds the sacred marrige bond together (disregarding people who actually live each other or atleast enjoy company). Idk about court biases much nor i got a two sided view on matter yet, i am not Western and legal system in divorce is overall shit to women here not men. But people should learn that mothers are not the only nurturers and men are not the only money makers.

 

[Babadook]

i am not Western and legal system in divorce is overall shit to women here not men.

Well, here in Middle Europe, the courts are biased towards women (._. )

 

[paratise]

Well, here in Middle Europe, the courts are biased towards women (._. )

Is it related to traditional gender expectations like man earns money, woman is taken care of, women are naturally more nurturing than men etc.?

 

[Babadook]

Is it related to traditional gender expectations like man earns money, woman is taken care of, women are naturally more nurturing than men etc.?

I guess so. Also, that little children are better off with the woman.

 

[YowYan]

Join the club. My mother told me that I'm handsome. I've come to realize that she's bias

You can always work on your physique as I did. I went from 'meh' to 'hm'

 

[Natsu Shazneel]

One night stands are the best way to make kids these days.

 

[Sakura Michiko]

Meh, I think the ring thing is stupid to be honest. That really should not define a marriage and I never really liked jewelry. I hate when people buy it for me especially expensive jewelry. I don't know much about the whole court thing.

 

[EnderWolf1013]

I don't see the problem.

You get a ring, propose, get married and if it was meant to be the you'll live with that person for the rest of your life.

 

[Cunning Linguist]

You can always work on your physique as I did. I went from 'meh' to 'hm'

Oh I do. Had the opposite effect though. Gave me body dismorphia. I'll never be as big as I want. Women are secondary at this point

 

[YowYan]

Oh I do. Had the opposite effect though. Gave me body dismorphia. I'll never be as big as I want. Women are secondary at this point

BDD is mental, right? I hope you can overcome that and continue working out for your own self-esteem. Regardless of the lack of game with women. Do it for yourself, not women.

 

[Yubel]

sign a prenup, then we're good to go.

If you get kids then that prenup gets thrown out the window, you're never safe.

 

[Funky Tiger]

Over here men aren't needed to pay alimony and stuff. Once a couple gets divorced, that's it. Unless they have kids they are total strangers again.

But lmao "he called me a ***** so which made me undergo extreme mental stress so he has to give me 50% of w/e he has and pay everything that he makes to me" is funny af.