Not to be rude but a lot of people here are confusing stress/feeling upset with depression. These are two very different things.
I'm currently battling depression myself, and I've recently gotten a lot better to the point where I don't have suicidal thoughts daily anymore, which is something I thought I'd never say. Some of the main things that helped me and may help you are
1. Talking about it. Oh my god, this helped so much. It doesn't matter with who, or where it is, when, etc. The only thing that matters is that you know that there's another person out there in the world who's taking the time out of their day to sit down and listen to you talk and vent your emotions and feelings (or lack thereof). This was huge for me, because this helped mitigate my thoughts of worthlessness/being a bother/etc. because they're doing it voluntarily.
2. This may sound cliche, but changing your negative thoughts into something productive. Personally, I've gotten myself into GFXing and writing. Now, the important thing about doing this is overlooked usually. The thing you want to make sure you do is have someone do it with you, or perhaps have someone who would willingly look/read at what you've made. This gives you motivation to continue doing what you do, this isn't a person you need to know in real life either. It could be here, on narutobase. You seem to write poetry and post it here on the base, and people like it. Make a friend (if you haven't already) with someone else who writes poetry and just talk about it. It's really nice to be able to talk about your hobbies with someone.
3. Changing your routine/daily activities. It may seem like something small or "that wouldn't really work for me", because I had the same thoughts at first, but it had definitely made an impact on my depression. It doesn't have to be something big like getting a job and whatnot, it could be something small. Maybe change up your routine in the shower, or go to the store and shop for something, anything, something small, just because. Just to do something new for once, or something different. It could be a pack of gum, it doesn't matter, just do something.
I really want to stress the first two points because those made more of an impact on my depression than the later. If you have the slightest interest in something, pursue it. See if you really do like it or not, maybe you could make a career out of it, or get a fanbase, or just, you know, something. Talk to a friend, open up, **** social stigmas, they're annoying.
If you don't have anyone to turn to, feel free to VM/PM me. I'd be more than glad to help.
