^^^ thisIt feels good until you realize she doesn't care for you.
imature love don't count..I think I have only been in love like once around when I was like 15 or something. It wasn't like ALOT though. But it counts.
that's called bromance u bakayaroo konoyaroo..honestly it's like what Madara has for Hashirama
rather then that...r u gonna apologize to me ????..when i first fell in love, its like that chick became the foundation of my happiness. almost all of my attention went to her, she became my everything and i wanted her to feel how much i loved her all the time. thinking of ways constantly to express my love for her, i wanted to be all that mattered to her and her to be all that mattered to me. for our souls and being to become one together that formed something greater with both of us as a whole
when we broke up, i remembered waking up everyday and literally feeling a pain where my heart was, thinking about how i had to go on without her...that pain i never forgot and made me more cautious of giving my heart to someone so i didnt feel that again. i dated a few women that i didnt allow myself to fall in love with
the second time i fell in love, it took a lot longer for me to get to that space again. but it wasnt the same, she wasnt the foundation of my happiness. i still tried to create a deep intimacy but there was always the feeling of the pain i felt. once the intimacy got deep enough, i felt like i could trust her, she understood me on a deeper level than the first time. we bonded through love making in a deeper way. my life was changing in a lot of ways but i felt like i was connected to her and wherever i was, i could feel her. i would think about her and she would text me. she became my comfort zone
then that ended and hurt the most. that same pain in my heart opened again and i felt it for longer. i started going to all kinds of parties in west L.A. doing hella drugs and drinking. fucking hoes, i fucked so many women just to try and forget about her, giving them false promises of the glamorous life. and it was funny to me, i felt like i didnt have a heart and it was just pain where it use to be and it kept me going. i didnt think i could ever love a woman again straight up
this time, the third time ive fallen in love. i had to get out of L.A. and try and let go of that pain in my heart. i was dating a few women at the same time before i met my current girlfriend. they helped heal my heart and think maybe i could give it to someone again, that pain is still there though. when i met my current girlfriend, it was like i knew her instantly, its like she knew exactly how to unlock my heart. we had such a strong connection, it was like she had a gravitational pull made specifically for me and i felt energized around her and it reminded me how love felt. so this time shes not the foundation of my happiness or my comfort zone. i still try and express my love for her but in smaller ways with a few larger ones, also she doesnt get all of my attention. i still try to build deep intimacy but not in hopes of trying to become one. instead being two who have a deep understanding of each other and want to grow through life together. its like a modified version of the first two times i fell in love, but instead of falling, its more like growing in love