0neCrazyAngel
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~~~ this is my first attempt in writing a poem after taking pointers from narugoku. thanks alot sensei~~~~
STAGNANT
The earth is subtly stagnant with the scent of our past.
Tightly, I hold to this one wasteful memory. No one will listen,
But will it be worth it to waste sickly breath with words?
Locked inside a body diseased with heartbreak
A promise broken is a shattered heart revealed.
And now I've learned.
Don’t tell anyone. I’m hurting, dying within.
If only they believed I could be immortal, open wide with shuttered life
Eyes scarred with scenes of our past, our smiling whispers together
Listen close. Secrets are hard to tell aloud.
Disappearing, I smile in spite of my pain
And try to reattach my broken bones as I watch him walk away
I sink into myself, falling past my bruised veins and dying heart
And into the ground beneath me, rotting, decomposing
I become a dying, decaying weed.
Guilt poisons me, leaves me breathless with my heart
Clenched in my shaking palms.
Put it down. Put it away. It’s not useful anymore, not now.
Bones can be repaired, but hearts cannot
And realizing this, I close my eyes.
What he says cannot bring me down to the dirt,
But what he did can bring me further down than I’ve ever been
I’ve been buried beneath, with the roots and stems of what I remember.
Sorrow seeps into my sallow skin
Penetrates each of the trembling steps that I take, each breath I choke out
Leaves me clutching at my chest in search of life
That was never there in the first place.
We were more than just a blind future.
We were humans attaching ourselves to the other, hoping that
Someday, we would finally be able to breathe with just one lung.
But his heart was given back as whole, beating freely, healthy
While mine was returned in pieces, infected, diseased.
Is it worth tripping over memories to take back
What was stolen from me?
Bleeding is meant for lovers, lost couples
Not for alienated humans like me, a rotting corpse
I allowed my emotions to eat me, consume me, drink up my future
And yet, I still wonder
Are you there? Can you feel me?
As I sleep, I imagine a bittersweet awakening
When I can no longer dream with his face in my eyes
And his name on my shaking lips, whispering, holding closer.
I am a seed, but I am doomed with each drop I inhale
Injured roots cannot hold life within much longer
I’d gladly decompose into the dirt beneath
If I knew it would remove you from the cavities of my skull.
Leave me once again, leave me with myself.
Frail, fatigued, I drag my vital signs along
Just one more day, one more day is all it will take.
Impossible.
I once believed that living without you was impossible.
So why am I still breathing?
STAGNANT
The earth is subtly stagnant with the scent of our past.
Tightly, I hold to this one wasteful memory. No one will listen,
But will it be worth it to waste sickly breath with words?
Locked inside a body diseased with heartbreak
A promise broken is a shattered heart revealed.
And now I've learned.
Don’t tell anyone. I’m hurting, dying within.
If only they believed I could be immortal, open wide with shuttered life
Eyes scarred with scenes of our past, our smiling whispers together
Listen close. Secrets are hard to tell aloud.
Disappearing, I smile in spite of my pain
And try to reattach my broken bones as I watch him walk away
I sink into myself, falling past my bruised veins and dying heart
And into the ground beneath me, rotting, decomposing
I become a dying, decaying weed.
Guilt poisons me, leaves me breathless with my heart
Clenched in my shaking palms.
Put it down. Put it away. It’s not useful anymore, not now.
Bones can be repaired, but hearts cannot
And realizing this, I close my eyes.
What he says cannot bring me down to the dirt,
But what he did can bring me further down than I’ve ever been
I’ve been buried beneath, with the roots and stems of what I remember.
Sorrow seeps into my sallow skin
Penetrates each of the trembling steps that I take, each breath I choke out
Leaves me clutching at my chest in search of life
That was never there in the first place.
We were more than just a blind future.
We were humans attaching ourselves to the other, hoping that
Someday, we would finally be able to breathe with just one lung.
But his heart was given back as whole, beating freely, healthy
While mine was returned in pieces, infected, diseased.
Is it worth tripping over memories to take back
What was stolen from me?
Bleeding is meant for lovers, lost couples
Not for alienated humans like me, a rotting corpse
I allowed my emotions to eat me, consume me, drink up my future
And yet, I still wonder
Are you there? Can you feel me?
As I sleep, I imagine a bittersweet awakening
When I can no longer dream with his face in my eyes
And his name on my shaking lips, whispering, holding closer.
I am a seed, but I am doomed with each drop I inhale
Injured roots cannot hold life within much longer
I’d gladly decompose into the dirt beneath
If I knew it would remove you from the cavities of my skull.
Leave me once again, leave me with myself.
Frail, fatigued, I drag my vital signs along
Just one more day, one more day is all it will take.
Impossible.
I once believed that living without you was impossible.
So why am I still breathing?
