Hey guys. So for the first time, yesterday, I began my soul search. I was writing down the pros and cons for joining the US Army, and being a civilian. The main reason I am still civilian is because I will possibly meet my long time lover next year, I am 24, and I have been in love with her ever since I was 13. But things happened and we couldnt see each other for so long. Anyway, I am in a dilemma. I've always wanted to meet her again, help her, and revive most of our old times. But I must also get my life together by joining the military. Most jobs in USA require either a college education or veteran experience. I am only in community college and I don't think I'll further my education, at least for now. I want your inputs. What would you choose? Love + Unguaranteed banking career, or military career?
[Discussion] Soul Search
- Thread starter HENI
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itachi4real
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TBH if u want guarantee then go to the military. U can find love there.
If it was me I would live life and go with love. Real love is rare. If the connection and s*** is real then yeah I would choose this option. But also if it's real it'll come back
ArabianLuffy
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this nikka minamoto is so virgin he cant make even gurlz....but me i am wear abaya and Keffiyeh and mustash and hanqout with looot oooof gurlz....even miss world fell in love wit me....datz why i am feel a pity for minamoto..
Pause, pause, pause. You've had feelings for her since you were 13, you're 24 now and you STILL haven't made any moves? You're lying to yourself if you think your feelings are being reciprocated. Does she even know youre attracted to her?
Go into the military, you need it. I can't remember if you're the same guy who's been making the threads about career issues and issues with your mom; if you are join military and make a man out of yourself. This shit is pathetic.
Go into the military, you need it. I can't remember if you're the same guy who's been making the threads about career issues and issues with your mom; if you are join military and make a man out of yourself. This shit is pathetic.
I'm not sure I understand why the choices are mutually exclusive. Why does joining the military mean you can't ever pursue this love interest?
As for love... I can only offer, as one blind man to another, a little bit of advice on getting hurt less while stumbling around in the dark. I might have found a light... but - I've chased a few lights in the past only to smack into a mirror. The love interest I had at 13 years old never really came of interest. My love interest at 21 ... hurt like hell, and it was a few years before I began feeling for someone, again. Even then, I grew rather used to the idea of attraction being one sided on my part, so even though there are signs the interest may be mutual, it's rather hard to believe. I'm used to people teasing me or trying to get me to do things for them.
However, that is because I tend to be rather introverted. The types of people who usually interact with me are more the manipulative type to begin with. "I've heard so-and-so is very smart, I bet if I ask him to help me with something, he will, especially if I shake my ass at him." Which, is silly - I'll generally help people who are interested in learning something or being helped. But it's rather obvious what they are trying to do, and my younger self was foolish enough to hold out hopes.
That is rather pessimistic, though. I had a crush on a girl from when I was about 7 years old until I was 12 and I had to move away. Learned, later, from my cousin that she kept the confession letter I wrote to her in her purse through high school. So, even though that couldn't really be lived out, it wasn't a bad result. We're still friends and she is married to a good guy with a couple kids. The reaction when she called me, though, after I sent that letter.... I literally couldn't talk. It was adorkable.
So, on the love front, I would say to stop over-thinking it. Don't overwhelm the girl, but at least let her know you're interested in her and would like to try and spend a bit of time to get to know her. Or... if she's a close friend, you know, climb out of that accursed friend-zone. You can spend your whole life regretting every moment you didn't talk to her, wondering if 'the right moment' appeared. If things don't go as you hope, it's not the end of the world.
Neither of which should have that much of an influence on what job you pursue. Be very careful how much you let your emotions guide your career decisions. Rushing off to join the military or to try and bury yourself in more college classes because a girl turned you down or gave you a hug is a potential formula for bad things.
I'd like to dispel a myth, though:
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I can attest to these words, personally, and from multiple perspectives.
First is the aspect of "stop looking for the right career" - there are a number of reasons why, but here is a very simple one... as a young man, I used to believe that I was joining a world of professional adults who knew what they were doing. My expectations of my elder peers were far, FAR too high, and I saw the expectations of every job as being atop a mountain that needed a degree to climb. They don't. Just finding people who will show up to work on time and who care to invest themselves into the trade/business they are employed is a God-send. If you show up to work willing to learn, I can teach you how to run the factory and how every machine in the place works - and you'll take that information and learn more. That is FAR more valuable than the guy who has a degree and goes to sleep in the air conditioning while I do the programming he's supposed to be doing in order to get my job done.
Learn trades/skills. While education and theory (degrees) are good for many, the problem is that they are relatively poor indicators of performance. I was a Skills USA competitor and was a strong performer in Electronics. When I was working for a company, we were going to have to replace a motor controller - a load alternator, basically. The company that was going to do it was going to charge $2,000 and the design was all based on relay logic and mechanical timers. Literally a 1960s solution. I used a PLC, taught myself ladder logic programming, and produced an all solid-state solution that could be custom programmed in the future, if need be, for a total price of just under $600 (including parts for which there was a minimum order quantity above what I needed and some trips to the hardware store for impromptu additions/adjustments). Worked flawlessly, staff loved it, still ticking some four years later with 24/7 operation.
Trades are ultimately more valuable than degrees. A degree can help you amplify a trade, but learn the trade. Or several trades. Welding, wood work, gardening, programming, etc - don't limit yourself to believing you are only one type of person or that you must focus your employment to one specific type of career.
This is where the military helps to a considerable degree, and you can come away from the military with a number of important social connections into the civilian world. One of the most important things I learned while being in the military was how valuable it is to find people willing to travel. A lot of people are not willing to travel, and so businesses will pay a lot for people who enjoy that type of thing. Degrees may help in competing with other applicants, but portfolios speak louder than degrees in many places. Build a track record of success and willingness to get the job done, and you'll be a strong applicant for a job whether you have a degree or not.
Now... as for the military - I would ask why you want to join the military. It's not that I am going to try and judge you, per say - many people start down a path for one reason, only to find many more reasons they never imagined to stay on it. I knew a number of people who joined the military because the judge told them they would either go to prison or join the military; a fair number of them became proud patriots who did they jobs well and looked after those around them. The military is quite a bit unlike other choices of a career. It's a 'job' that can demand the ultimate sacrifice. While the odds may be relatively low, and I hope we are heading for a time of peace and an end to proxy wars... but the fact of the matter remains - the job of people in the military is to run towards the types of things most people run from to save their lives. It's also a 'job' that places you as a guardian of the Constitution, of a vanguard against corruption of the government and attempts to turn the civilians into the servants of the political caste.
While the military does pay, and does teach many valuable skills... it's also a duty that imposes a number of criteria you will not find in the civilian world.... for better, and for worse.
Speaking of.... I'll be honest, a lot of times, I tend to interpret complements as being sarcastic. Call it a side-effect of dedicating most of my time on the internet to countering media warfare operations.
That said, I am going to take the above as sincere and thank you for your confidence in me, while apologizing for the jungle of text, above. I hope there are many beautiful flowers/trees within to be found, I just suck at arranging them.
Oh, and I wasn't CIA. I was Navy. Aviation Electronics Technician. Though I ended up doing a lot of everything but that. Still enjoyed most of it, though.
i said member of C.A.I ....NOT C.I.A.......C.A.I = Cool And Intelligent.... it's a theory i made about a groupe of underestimated pipole who have powerz to change Society through producing amazing ideas.....
Ah, okay. I figured there was meaning behind your arrangement, but went with the straight-forward interpretation. Thankyou for placing me in that group. I'd place you there, too 'chatbot.'
thank you for telling me hb tho it was fake nb bd but thx...Ah, okay. I figured there was meaning behind your arrangement, but went with the straight-forward interpretation. Thankyou for placing me in that group. I'd place you there, too 'chatbot.'
HowDidIGetPrem
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HowDidIGetPrem
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Ur making yourself look dumber with this comment! Minamoto is such a dumb person that teh birds call stoopid birds Minamoto-brains.
HowDidIGetPrem
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no uwhat a dumb stupid u r :
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....
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Hmm.... I was curious if they were supposed to be like your kid, or something. You know - like how old noble families used to do it with naming their kid after themselves and then naming them 'the second.' Except, in this case, rather than starting at 1 and naming the second 'the second' - we start at zero and name the next one 'the first.'
But it didn't really make any sense, especially given some other stuff I think I know. So I just kind of sat back and tried to gather more information.