Animaster21
Member
Hi guys.
I'm not entirely sure if this should go in the General Discussion or the Chatterbox, but I'm putting it in here because it's somewhat serious. Please don't bash me or laugh at me or anything, I'm just trying to ask for some advice.
So there's this girl. I'm gonna be completely honest here and admit that I've never been in a serious relationship. The few girls that I've ever kissed have only ever been pecks and I don't consider them first kisses. So basically, I'm as nervous as hell.
But about the girl. We've known each other for years through a mutual friend at school, and about three-four years ago started getting to know each other and became friends. She's in the grade below me, but repeated a year back in Grade 1, so she should be in Grade 11, which is where I am now. I've always been kinda attracted to her because she's really pretty, but as I've got to know her I've come to like her even more for her personality than anything else. We're really alike, and we have a tradition of hugging each other whenever we pass at school. It's nice, and I can always make her laugh, and she can always make me laugh.
About a month ago we were at a friend's party, and there was a mini bonfire. The friend also has a piano, and I play, so I was fooling around on the piano with this girl, and I found out that she played a little as well, so we were having fun playing duets and I was teaching her a few things and stuff. Later on, we went out by the fire and I laid down on her lap for a joke. After a while though, it turned into more than that and we were just lying there in each others arms, and playing with her iPod. She kept on singing in my ear, and it was the best, sweetest sound I've ever heard. We were holding hands and stroking each others fingers and stuff, and it was really warm against her body. Sometimes we'd turn our heads and our cheeks would be literally touching and stuff.
I didn't realise it then, but I was trulyhappy for the first time in a long time. It was like everything else had just gone away and she was all that was there.
With about half an hour to go we went back on the piano until her sister got there to pick her up (this is like 10:00 or something) and just before she left she gave me a hug, and we didn't let go for about thirty seconds. We were just in each other's arms and neither of us wanted to let go. I should have just kissed her or asked her out or something, but I didn't realise at the time how I felt. So she left, and I was still happy.
The next day was a Sunday, and I was relaxing and playing Final Fantasy XIII. And then I realised it all. As I was lying there on the couch, I realised that I couldn't get her out of my head. I couldn't concentrate and all I could see was her face, and I could still feel her body up against mine and the warmth of her face and the sound of her voice.
So I went back to school on Monday and was still thinking about her constantly, but I had no clue what to do now if I saw her. So I brought it up to my friend, who had hosted the party. Let's call her J. J's like the sweetest kindest person ever and she thought it was so cute, and she also understood exactly how I felt because she feels the same about the guy she's going out with. Anyway, so she gives me a bit of advice and tells me I should just ask her out and stuff, but I'm a complete chicken, so I don't. Later on that day I see this girl and we hug like normal, and I sort of whisper in her ear about how much fun I had on Saturday, but then we had to keep going to our next classes so she didn't really have time to respond. So I tell my other friend (let's call him A) that's with me about my and her. I trust him with anything.
Now, I'd better explain just how much I was thinking about this girl. I couldn't concentrate in class, I ended up losing my appetite for four days and every time I thought of her this little flame sort of lit up inside my heart and kept me warm. So I was pretty much warm all the time because I was always thinking of her. You know in those movies and TV shows when they say "I've never felt like this about anyone before?" I used to think that was cliche, but it's completely true. Any crushes I've ever had before have just been that; silly little crushes. This was different. I won't say the L word because I know it's not like that that. But it was more than just liking her, it was something else.
So that night I was talking to her on Facebook and when I asked her about some maths homework that we'd been laughing about earlier she told me that she wasn't quite getting it. Being a complete maths geek, I told her that I'd happily help her out the next day at lunch in the library. So I was looking forward to that. I was also talking to my two friend, J and A, in a different chat, just freakin' out and exploding in happiness at the same time. I recall saying ~SQUEEEEEEEEE! at one point.
So I saw her the next day in the library as planned, and we were just hanging out along. I was planning on asking her out at the end of lunch for the weekend, but then one of my other friends shows up and begins helping out with the maths as well, completely ruining the mood. I felt like punching him in the face, but I didn't say anything. Because of this, I didn't ask her out.
So later that night I was on Facebook with A and J the entire night, all discussing how I should go about the whole situation. By this time I wasn't eating anything at all and I was literally the most scared I've ever been in my whole life. I was terrified that she'd reject me. Anyway, so in the end I messaged her asking to speak to her in private the next day before school.
So we met in private. She was a little late so I only had about three minutes before we had to go to class. So I just...told her. I've never used that voice before, it's the kind of voice I'd save for that special someone, and I really want her to be that someone. So she's taking it pretty well and smiling, and she kept on saying "wow" a lot. She wasn't recoiling or saying no or anything. All she ended up saying was that she felt bad.
So we went to our respective classes and I wasn't feeling too up or too down. She hadn't said yes, and she hadn't said no. I was just giving her some time. But then, about halfway through the day, we passed each other and it was so awkward. We just said hi and kept going, and I didn't realise until a few hours later what had made it so awkward; she hadn't hugged me. It was the first time in about two years that she'd seen me and not tried to hug me.
For the rest of the day, I was depressed. As in, not talking very much, staring at the wall, and in a Double English lesson where we reading our books for our assignments, I read seven pages. In an hour and a half. When I once read the entirety of Harry Potter 7 in just twelve hours straight. I'm a heavy reader, so you can tell that my mind was wondering. I went to the local gym for rec sport later on in the afternoon and two of my other friends were trying to cheer me up, but it didn't do much. And then, on the way home on the bus, I just sent her a text, saying that I was sorry and that I wished that I'd never said anything at all. And I pretty much pleaded with her to forget the whole thing and just go back to being friends like we used to be. My worst nightmare was not being able to see her and have her smile.
Then she sends me this text back, saying how I was the one making it awkward and that in her eyes, I was still the same person and that she still wanted to be my friend. So the awkwardness was over and my appetite came back. I could also think of other things aside from her for the first time in days as well. So that constant thinking was over. and when I saw her the next day, she hugged me, and I felt so happy that things were back to normal.
Now, during the period where it was awkward, one of out mutual friends was talking to her about me and everything, and this mutual friend told me that afternoon that it wasn't necessarily because she didn't like me that didn't say yes, but it was because she doesn't like dating. I've been happy just having her back as a friend, and deep down I'm content with just being friends.
But I still like her. That constant thinking about her is gone, but I still think about her every single day. For a few weeks there was a tiny rift between us and it was still a tiny bit awkward, but the other day she called out to me and demanded a hug like she used to, instead of me giving it to her on my own initiative, and whenever I see her she's genuinely pleased to see me.
Now, I was talking to another friend who's pretty much BFFs with this girl, but that doesn't go to our school anymore. Still one of my best friends, but that's beside the point. Let's call her A2. A2 told me what the mutual friend has said, that this girl doesn't like dating very much, and that she saw me a friend.
And now, I'm thinking about her all the time. whenever I hear a mention of words that have to do with relationships or see pictures of a couple I automatically think of what I'm missing out on with this girl. I seriously feel like there's a massive hole inside me that only she can fill. I feel empty.
I just can't get her out of my head, and there's no one else I've ever liked like this before. and every time I see her face, I smile and that fire lights in my heart.
What should I do next? I'm just so confused, but I've gotta be with her so much. I hope I didn't come across as Edward Cullen or anything, it's not like it's stalker-ish. It's genuine warmth. And I don't sparkle.
I just want to take her face in my hands and just kiss her, so so much. I want to teach her piano, I want to hear her voice in my ear, I want to take her out to the movies and just be with her. I want to be with her so much, and I never want to see her go.
She's leaving the school at the end of the year, but we've promised to see each other still. I want to be with her by then so that I know for sure that we will see each other. Everyone tells me that we'd be really good together, and a friend (S) told me that I'd be a rare prize for this girl because I like her so much more for her personality rather than her body (she's pretty hot) like most other guys. At the moment we're still really good friends but I want it to be more than that. I just don't know what to do next to make it like that.
Thx for reading all this.
Please help me.
I'm not entirely sure if this should go in the General Discussion or the Chatterbox, but I'm putting it in here because it's somewhat serious. Please don't bash me or laugh at me or anything, I'm just trying to ask for some advice.
So there's this girl. I'm gonna be completely honest here and admit that I've never been in a serious relationship. The few girls that I've ever kissed have only ever been pecks and I don't consider them first kisses. So basically, I'm as nervous as hell.
But about the girl. We've known each other for years through a mutual friend at school, and about three-four years ago started getting to know each other and became friends. She's in the grade below me, but repeated a year back in Grade 1, so she should be in Grade 11, which is where I am now. I've always been kinda attracted to her because she's really pretty, but as I've got to know her I've come to like her even more for her personality than anything else. We're really alike, and we have a tradition of hugging each other whenever we pass at school. It's nice, and I can always make her laugh, and she can always make me laugh.
About a month ago we were at a friend's party, and there was a mini bonfire. The friend also has a piano, and I play, so I was fooling around on the piano with this girl, and I found out that she played a little as well, so we were having fun playing duets and I was teaching her a few things and stuff. Later on, we went out by the fire and I laid down on her lap for a joke. After a while though, it turned into more than that and we were just lying there in each others arms, and playing with her iPod. She kept on singing in my ear, and it was the best, sweetest sound I've ever heard. We were holding hands and stroking each others fingers and stuff, and it was really warm against her body. Sometimes we'd turn our heads and our cheeks would be literally touching and stuff.
I didn't realise it then, but I was trulyhappy for the first time in a long time. It was like everything else had just gone away and she was all that was there.
With about half an hour to go we went back on the piano until her sister got there to pick her up (this is like 10:00 or something) and just before she left she gave me a hug, and we didn't let go for about thirty seconds. We were just in each other's arms and neither of us wanted to let go. I should have just kissed her or asked her out or something, but I didn't realise at the time how I felt. So she left, and I was still happy.
The next day was a Sunday, and I was relaxing and playing Final Fantasy XIII. And then I realised it all. As I was lying there on the couch, I realised that I couldn't get her out of my head. I couldn't concentrate and all I could see was her face, and I could still feel her body up against mine and the warmth of her face and the sound of her voice.
So I went back to school on Monday and was still thinking about her constantly, but I had no clue what to do now if I saw her. So I brought it up to my friend, who had hosted the party. Let's call her J. J's like the sweetest kindest person ever and she thought it was so cute, and she also understood exactly how I felt because she feels the same about the guy she's going out with. Anyway, so she gives me a bit of advice and tells me I should just ask her out and stuff, but I'm a complete chicken, so I don't. Later on that day I see this girl and we hug like normal, and I sort of whisper in her ear about how much fun I had on Saturday, but then we had to keep going to our next classes so she didn't really have time to respond. So I tell my other friend (let's call him A) that's with me about my and her. I trust him with anything.
Now, I'd better explain just how much I was thinking about this girl. I couldn't concentrate in class, I ended up losing my appetite for four days and every time I thought of her this little flame sort of lit up inside my heart and kept me warm. So I was pretty much warm all the time because I was always thinking of her. You know in those movies and TV shows when they say "I've never felt like this about anyone before?" I used to think that was cliche, but it's completely true. Any crushes I've ever had before have just been that; silly little crushes. This was different. I won't say the L word because I know it's not like that that. But it was more than just liking her, it was something else.
So that night I was talking to her on Facebook and when I asked her about some maths homework that we'd been laughing about earlier she told me that she wasn't quite getting it. Being a complete maths geek, I told her that I'd happily help her out the next day at lunch in the library. So I was looking forward to that. I was also talking to my two friend, J and A, in a different chat, just freakin' out and exploding in happiness at the same time. I recall saying ~SQUEEEEEEEEE! at one point.
So I saw her the next day in the library as planned, and we were just hanging out along. I was planning on asking her out at the end of lunch for the weekend, but then one of my other friends shows up and begins helping out with the maths as well, completely ruining the mood. I felt like punching him in the face, but I didn't say anything. Because of this, I didn't ask her out.
So later that night I was on Facebook with A and J the entire night, all discussing how I should go about the whole situation. By this time I wasn't eating anything at all and I was literally the most scared I've ever been in my whole life. I was terrified that she'd reject me. Anyway, so in the end I messaged her asking to speak to her in private the next day before school.
So we met in private. She was a little late so I only had about three minutes before we had to go to class. So I just...told her. I've never used that voice before, it's the kind of voice I'd save for that special someone, and I really want her to be that someone. So she's taking it pretty well and smiling, and she kept on saying "wow" a lot. She wasn't recoiling or saying no or anything. All she ended up saying was that she felt bad.
So we went to our respective classes and I wasn't feeling too up or too down. She hadn't said yes, and she hadn't said no. I was just giving her some time. But then, about halfway through the day, we passed each other and it was so awkward. We just said hi and kept going, and I didn't realise until a few hours later what had made it so awkward; she hadn't hugged me. It was the first time in about two years that she'd seen me and not tried to hug me.
For the rest of the day, I was depressed. As in, not talking very much, staring at the wall, and in a Double English lesson where we reading our books for our assignments, I read seven pages. In an hour and a half. When I once read the entirety of Harry Potter 7 in just twelve hours straight. I'm a heavy reader, so you can tell that my mind was wondering. I went to the local gym for rec sport later on in the afternoon and two of my other friends were trying to cheer me up, but it didn't do much. And then, on the way home on the bus, I just sent her a text, saying that I was sorry and that I wished that I'd never said anything at all. And I pretty much pleaded with her to forget the whole thing and just go back to being friends like we used to be. My worst nightmare was not being able to see her and have her smile.
Then she sends me this text back, saying how I was the one making it awkward and that in her eyes, I was still the same person and that she still wanted to be my friend. So the awkwardness was over and my appetite came back. I could also think of other things aside from her for the first time in days as well. So that constant thinking was over. and when I saw her the next day, she hugged me, and I felt so happy that things were back to normal.
Now, during the period where it was awkward, one of out mutual friends was talking to her about me and everything, and this mutual friend told me that afternoon that it wasn't necessarily because she didn't like me that didn't say yes, but it was because she doesn't like dating. I've been happy just having her back as a friend, and deep down I'm content with just being friends.
But I still like her. That constant thinking about her is gone, but I still think about her every single day. For a few weeks there was a tiny rift between us and it was still a tiny bit awkward, but the other day she called out to me and demanded a hug like she used to, instead of me giving it to her on my own initiative, and whenever I see her she's genuinely pleased to see me.
Now, I was talking to another friend who's pretty much BFFs with this girl, but that doesn't go to our school anymore. Still one of my best friends, but that's beside the point. Let's call her A2. A2 told me what the mutual friend has said, that this girl doesn't like dating very much, and that she saw me a friend.
And now, I'm thinking about her all the time. whenever I hear a mention of words that have to do with relationships or see pictures of a couple I automatically think of what I'm missing out on with this girl. I seriously feel like there's a massive hole inside me that only she can fill. I feel empty.
I just can't get her out of my head, and there's no one else I've ever liked like this before. and every time I see her face, I smile and that fire lights in my heart.
What should I do next? I'm just so confused, but I've gotta be with her so much. I hope I didn't come across as Edward Cullen or anything, it's not like it's stalker-ish. It's genuine warmth. And I don't sparkle.
I just want to take her face in my hands and just kiss her, so so much. I want to teach her piano, I want to hear her voice in my ear, I want to take her out to the movies and just be with her. I want to be with her so much, and I never want to see her go.
She's leaving the school at the end of the year, but we've promised to see each other still. I want to be with her by then so that I know for sure that we will see each other. Everyone tells me that we'd be really good together, and a friend (S) told me that I'd be a rare prize for this girl because I like her so much more for her personality rather than her body (she's pretty hot) like most other guys. At the moment we're still really good friends but I want it to be more than that. I just don't know what to do next to make it like that.
Thx for reading all this.
Please help me.