Winter Savior
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Sleeper #1
You’ve stumbled upon Pleasant Grove. It’s no different from any other city in a world where ‘everything is perfect’ has become ‘everything is normal’. The days go by, life goes on, but nothing ever changes. There’s still crime, there’s still strife, but these things don’t just happen. They occur because in a perfect world everything isn’t perfect. But everyone knows. They enter supermarkets where products are simply named titles as ‘Food’ on plain white labels. They see a car broken down on the side of the road, knowing that the driver likely sabotaged his own vehicle. But even then it’s all reactionary. Everything happens because it has to happen, because in a perfect world everything isn’t perfect.
He watched as his son Max tore open the present, delight in his face. His wife stood by the boy’s side sharing a warm smile with Alan as they celebrated their son’s seventh birthday. Max looked into the box and back at his father with a wide grin on his face.
“It’s my birthday Mr. Stone.”
Alan laughed, “Of course it is son, that’s why we’re celebrating.”
“It’s my birthday Mr. Stone.”
Alan’s smile faltered, “Yes it is Max, but why are you calling me Mr. Stone?”
He turned to his wife, her face concerned as she looked at Alan. When she spoke her words came out in a prepubescent voice unlike her own.
“Are you alright Mr. Stone?”
He jumped from his chair as the entire scene turned red before his eyes. The walls were splattered with blood. His wife and son were gone. The room began to spin. His son’s screams filled the air. He stumbled forward, catching the table for support. The unwrapped box that had been on it fell from the table to the floor by his feet. He looked down to see his son’s severed head staring back at him.
“Mr. Stone?”
The scene dissolves away as he shakes his head clear to see a little girl standing in front of his desk, a concerned look upon her face.
“Mr. Stone are you okay?”
“What?”
“You look worse than usual.”
“No, no I’m fine,” he said. “Did you want something?”
“I said it was my birthday,” she said, eyeing his desk expectantly.
“Oh Happy Birthday Sarah, how old are you?” he asked, offering up a smile.
She gave a toothy grin, “Seven!”
“That’s, that’s great Sarah,” he said as he got up from the desk. “Excuse me.”
“Hey, what about the birthday candy?” she asked as he walked past.
“Just get it out of my desk,” he called back.
He went to the restroom and turned on the sink. The water was cold against his face. As he looked into the mirror a weary eyed reflection stared back at him.
From the side of the school he watched as the buses pulled up right on time. A minute later, the final bus arrived just as the bell sounded for the kids to be released from class. He lit a cigarette as the students milled out of the building.
“I’ve been looking all over for you Mr. Stone.”
It was a woman’s voice. It belonged to Principal Valeriano. Alan didn’t turn around.
“What for?”
“You can’t leave your students unsupervised like that.”
He gestured to the children outside the schoolyard, “I’m watching the kids right now.”
“And you shouldn’t be smoking anywhere near the school.”
He turned around to face her, “Everyone has their thing Jessica, let me be.”
She made as if to say something but stopped herself. She shook her head as she walked past Alan.
“You missed a button on your shirt,” Alan stated.
She nodded and made as if to fix it as she walked around the corner. He knew she wouldn’t. Everyone has their thing.
Welcome
You’ve stumbled upon Pleasant Grove. It’s no different from any other city in a world where ‘everything is perfect’ has become ‘everything is normal’. The days go by, life goes on, but nothing ever changes. There’s still crime, there’s still strife, but these things don’t just happen. They occur because in a perfect world everything isn’t perfect. But everyone knows. They enter supermarkets where products are simply named titles as ‘Food’ on plain white labels. They see a car broken down on the side of the road, knowing that the driver likely sabotaged his own vehicle. But even then it’s all reactionary. Everything happens because it has to happen, because in a perfect world everything isn’t perfect.
***
He watched as his son Max tore open the present, delight in his face. His wife stood by the boy’s side sharing a warm smile with Alan as they celebrated their son’s seventh birthday. Max looked into the box and back at his father with a wide grin on his face.
“It’s my birthday Mr. Stone.”
Alan laughed, “Of course it is son, that’s why we’re celebrating.”
“It’s my birthday Mr. Stone.”
Alan’s smile faltered, “Yes it is Max, but why are you calling me Mr. Stone?”
He turned to his wife, her face concerned as she looked at Alan. When she spoke her words came out in a prepubescent voice unlike her own.
“Are you alright Mr. Stone?”
He jumped from his chair as the entire scene turned red before his eyes. The walls were splattered with blood. His wife and son were gone. The room began to spin. His son’s screams filled the air. He stumbled forward, catching the table for support. The unwrapped box that had been on it fell from the table to the floor by his feet. He looked down to see his son’s severed head staring back at him.
“Mr. Stone?”
The scene dissolves away as he shakes his head clear to see a little girl standing in front of his desk, a concerned look upon her face.
“Mr. Stone are you okay?”
“What?”
“You look worse than usual.”
“No, no I’m fine,” he said. “Did you want something?”
“I said it was my birthday,” she said, eyeing his desk expectantly.
“Oh Happy Birthday Sarah, how old are you?” he asked, offering up a smile.
She gave a toothy grin, “Seven!”
“That’s, that’s great Sarah,” he said as he got up from the desk. “Excuse me.”
“Hey, what about the birthday candy?” she asked as he walked past.
“Just get it out of my desk,” he called back.
He went to the restroom and turned on the sink. The water was cold against his face. As he looked into the mirror a weary eyed reflection stared back at him.
From the side of the school he watched as the buses pulled up right on time. A minute later, the final bus arrived just as the bell sounded for the kids to be released from class. He lit a cigarette as the students milled out of the building.
“I’ve been looking all over for you Mr. Stone.”
It was a woman’s voice. It belonged to Principal Valeriano. Alan didn’t turn around.
“What for?”
“You can’t leave your students unsupervised like that.”
He gestured to the children outside the schoolyard, “I’m watching the kids right now.”
“And you shouldn’t be smoking anywhere near the school.”
He turned around to face her, “Everyone has their thing Jessica, let me be.”
She made as if to say something but stopped herself. She shook her head as she walked past Alan.
“You missed a button on your shirt,” Alan stated.
She nodded and made as if to fix it as she walked around the corner. He knew she wouldn’t. Everyone has their thing.
Author's Note
You've just seen the first chapter of a new story I'm going to be working on. It carries a more noir crime/thriller feel than my AlterOne work and without as much world building as well as being more centralized so it's even easier to follow. I hope that you all enjoy it and I'll surely continue this.
You've just seen the first chapter of a new story I'm going to be working on. It carries a more noir crime/thriller feel than my AlterOne work and without as much world building as well as being more centralized so it's even easier to follow. I hope that you all enjoy it and I'll surely continue this.
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Already, you're showing us some nice characterization, too, with both Alan and Jessica. There's some places where there should be commas and others where commas should be periods, but it was very well-written otherwise. And I really like that last part of the story:
