[Mystery] Over in a Flash of Red Chapter 11

FaHaD 5212

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Chapter 11: Predators or Prey?

As I said, I'm back faster than usual, however not as fast as I hoped for. A lot has been going on in real life and I wanted to make this chapter special; this is the longest one till now after all. The one whose prediction was closest was... ME no one here tried, congratulations you get a cookie jar (yay). Anyway, onto the chapter.

"I tried so hard, and got so far" - Human Speech
'But in the end, it doesn't even matter' - Human Thought
"I had to fall, and lose it all" - Biju Speech
'But in the end, it doesn't even matter' - Biju Thought
Amaterasu (Heavenly Illumination) - Jutsu

Quote of the Day:
Power comes in response to a need, not a desire. You have to create that need. ~ Son Goku (Dragonball)

Disclaimer: I Akaryu no Ikari 5212 do not own Naruto.

Chapter 11: Predators or Prey?

Uzumaki Estate – Konoha


Naruto had started Fuinjutsu (Sealing Art) practice with Mea in the afternoon. Sunset was approaching and Naruto decided to have a walk through the streets of the village before calling it a day.

Moving around was not a problem. Everyone in the village cleared out a path away on which he walked alone, of course Naruto ignored this method of isolation. The villagers had realized that they couldn't touch him physically anymore so a year or two after Naruto's training began; they started to try to hurt him through other means.

They isolated him, did not socialize with him, and ignored him. Basically, they acted as if he didn't even exist yet at the same time, occasionally glared at him, trying to break his spirit.

'I don't even know why I put up with these people.' Naruto thought, 'Maybe it's because Nana and Mea are safe here, and Kaa-chan and Nii-chan like it here. Well whatever, it's not like it makes any difference where I live, in the outside world I'll have Missing-Nin and Hunter-Nin after me, here I just have these idiots.'

Naruto decided to stop thinking about pointless things and decided to enjoy the scenery for a while before going back... That is, until he sensed three presences tailing him.

=====OFR=====
Hokage Office – Konoha

Sarutobi Hiruzen was doing his usual job, signing paperwork and brooding about the village's future. 'Why do I get the feeling that Danzo is about to do something so foolish that a headless chicken running around would seem like the epitome of intelligence?'

Sighing, Hiruzen shook off those thoughts and continued his work.

=====OFR=====
Uchiha Clan Head's Training Ground – Konoha

"... Very good Nana-chan, your progress with a sword so far is surprising" Mikoto complimented.

"Heh, I'm just that awesome" Nana boasted with her chest puffed up.

"I'm sure you are." Mikoto dismissed Nana's childishness, she was a child after all, "Anyway we both have to go, I have to attend a clan meeting as Fugaku requested me to and you should hurry up and go home, you can't keep your Naru-kun waiting after all."

"Fine, later Kaa-chan" Nana turned around.

"Ja Ne Nana-chan" with that both Mikoto and Nana left in swirls of leaves.

=====OFR=====
Trees - Konoha

It was around sunset. Uchiha Shisui had a goal, and he would fulfill it... However there was one small complication… He was being chased after by five Anbu. Sighing, he reminisced the sequence of events.

Flashback

Shisui had just started to move towards his Clan's compound when he suddenly felt a Chakra spike and an increase of temperature. Instinct honed through fighting a war, Shisui on impulse jumped high and back flipped, dodging a fireball aimed at him.

Looking at the perpetrators of the situation, Shisui saw that they were five Konoha Anbu, just that their animal markings where multicolored instead of red. One of the Anbu had an off-white cloak, he was the leader, and the rest wore black cloaks. 'So this is Root? Anbu level Shinobi huh? Well isn't my luck all dandy today.'

Shisui was annoyed but there was nothing he could do but fend them off and escape.

Taking some Kunai with Naruto's custom explosive tags attached to them, Shisui initiated a large explosion at the feet of the Anbu by throwing the Kunai and lighting the tags. This made the Root Anbu lose focus for a second, which Shisui capitalized on and dashed away.

Flashback - End

"Hurry up, we must at least direct him to the target point" the leader said in monotone.

Cursing under his breath, Shisui noticed that his trail was hot again. Finding a clearing Shisui landed and turned around, deciding to end this before things got worse. Someone walked out.

It wasn't one of the Root Anbu.

"So the mastermind finally decides to grace me with his presence." Shisui mocked, "Shimura Danzo! What is the meaning of this?!" Shisui was a little loud, understandable considering his situation.

"I believe that your method of dealing with the Uchiha is only temporary so I am doing what must be done in order to protect Konoha. Don't worry; I'll make good use of your eyes to protect your home." Danzo replied.

"And what if I refuse?" Shisui tested his luck.

"We'll have some complications then, won't we?" Danzo then motioned his Anbu to step out, just one thing was eye-catching. An unconscious Uzumaki Naruto.

"Why you... Y-You cowardly bastard!" Shisui roared.

"Hardly, your death will not be because of your lack of skill, but because you hold such pathetic bonds."

'Ugh, what just hit me?' Naruto thought as he tried to move, but found himself unable to do so "What the..?" He then saw the back of someone in black robes and a white shirt facing... 'Why is Nii-chan here? Wait.' He then pieces together the information he was being followed by three people who were currently present, he couldn't move his limbs, he was in an isolated area in the forest, and his Sensei was facing some guy who held him like... 'A prisoner? Let's see, I can use Chakra so I just need to contact Shisu-nii.'

Shisui noticed Naruto waking up, the others did not. Naruto showed Shisui a devious smile, Shisui immediately understood what to do, ‘You clever little...'

Shisui immediately used one of Naruto's moves Ittōryū Iai: Shishi Sonson (One Sword Style Draw and Re-sheath Technique: Lion's Song), vanishing in a burst of speed and reappearing behind Danzo and his Anbu, Shishui finished putting his Tanto back into its sheath. As soon as he did that, the ropes binding Naruto were cut into pieces. Amongst the Root, only Danzo saw that Naruto was being freed but was too slow to stop Shisui.

Naruto immediately used a Shunshin (Body Flicker) to move to Shisui's side. "Nice work Nii-chan, let's deal with these guys."

Danzo had left as soon as Naruto was free, he couldn't risk being seen. Shisui was dead, his fate was sealed but he wouldn't kill the Jinchuriki, 'Sarutobi would know immediately if I did. I have to leave this to Root alone, if the Jinchuriki saw my face, it would be bad, to say the least.'

"Naruto, get out of here." Shisui was worried.

"No, you taught me, I can help you." Naruto replied.

Seeing a poison bomb about to be thrown at their direction, Shisui picked up Naruto and THREW him away, barely managing to escape the gas in a Shunshin (Body Flicker). He coughed 'Damn, I must have inhaled some of the poison.'

Naruto regained his bearings, landed on tree, saw a poison cloud and dashed towards Shisui's location, only to find him stumbling.

Shisui was about to fall, but was caught by Naruto, 'Yes, I can't give up yet. Kushi-sensei, watch over me.' Shisui thought and said tiredly "I...thought I told you to...away. I guess I'll let you stay...but you won't get a chance to fight."

Shisui then inhaled a large amount of air and exhaled, calming himself. He then closed his eyes, opening them to reveal the Mangekyo Sharingan, a four pointed pinwheel.

Naruto was about to say something but was cut off when both he and his teacher got engulfed in an ethereal aura which quickly took on the form of a humanoid skeletal form without legs. The ribs in front of its chest were opened revealing a red Magatama in it. It had blade-like appendages on its shoulders, the side of its face, and along its forearms.

"This is the Susano'o (He will the Ability to Help by all Means), Naruto" Shisui had a focused expression and all could do was nod; he was surprised after all.

The Root Anbu who stood in front of the Susano'o, were stunned and stood still got a moment...which was all Shisui needed. He focused his Chakra, and out of the magatama, he shot a barrage large green Chakra Needles.

The Anbu initially managed to dodge but were eventually overwhelmed and all eight, including the kidnapping team, got killed and dropped to the ground.

At this moment, Shisui's Susano'o immediately turned back into a skeletal form and then vanished altogether. The user fell to his knees, but supported by Naruto so he didn't fall on the ground.

Coughing and catching his breath, Shisui motioned Naruto to move out of the area with him.

=====OFR=====
A Cliff at the Edge of Uchiha Territory – Konoha

Naruto and Shisui had moved out of the trees to a cliff which had a river flowing at the bottom. On the way there, Shisui had written a note and entrusted Naruto with it, instructing him to give it to Itachi.

"Naruto, you are like the brother I never had and the best student I could ever have asked for." Shisui then coughed again.

"Come on Shisu-nii, this isn't funny. Why are you saying this stuff?" Naruto was a bit confused, no matter how much maturity he had, he was still a child.

"Naruto, Otouto, I cannot live past today, the poison will get me before I can go to a doctor. Danzo was after my eyes, I want you to have them. My eyes possess a special ability which in the wrong hands can prove disastrous." Shisui paused and coughed, "Enough about that stuff. Naruto I am about to die, I can't do anything about it. So before I go, I want you to have a parting gift" he handed Naruto a Kunai.

"N-N-No... Don't do this Nii-chan" tears were forming in Naruto's eyes, the Kunai in his hand shaking like a leaf.

"I'm serious Naruto; you will unlock your Mangekyo. I'm a dead man so accept a dying man's last wish. I'm Uchiha Izuna's descendant so the transfer of my eyes to overcome blindness should work without any issues." Shisui then proceeded to form a Fuinjutsu (Sealing Art) array for storage and put two containers with a special organic preserving fluid in it. He then took out his right eye, and put it in one of the containers. Doing the same with the other, ignoring the pain once again, he sealed the eyes in the scroll with knowledge from his memory and experience in working in conditions with low vision.

'Looking' at Naruto with closed eyes, he said "Don't make that expression Naruto, I've known you since you were a little kid, even like this I can see your face as clear as day." Naruto continued to frown. "Look Naruto, I know this may be hard but you have to accept this. Now then...its time I left, you've made me proud Naruto." He gave Naruto a warm and endearing smile and suddenly pushed himself onto the Kunai, the blade piercing his gut. Tumbling towards the cliffside, intent on falling off, Shisui used the last of his consciousness to mutter, "Goodbye, my precious little brother."

As Shisui fell down, dead yet smiling in content, Naruto's tears stopped falling. He felt...cold, tired, no. He felt...nothing, as if his emotions from before had all disappeared. "Why?" he asked no one in particular "I'm feeling nothing. Why am I not hurting? Why isn't Nii-chan's sacrifice awakening the Mangekyo Sharingan? WHY DAMN IT?!!!" That was it, he had been broken. He then silently turned around made his way back home. However he remembered the task entrusted to him, hence moved to finish it after sensing Itachi's Chakra signature. The Mangekyo Sharingan in his eyes, identified as a Fuma Shuriken pattern, fading back into his normal eyes; Naruto never knew of the development.

=====OFR=====
Streets - Konoha

Itachi had just come back from reporting a week long mission, just some infiltration and spying followed by immediate disposal once all the information had been gathered. Normal stuff for an Anbu Captain.

He was silently walking the streets, enjoying the peace. However he then came face to face with Naruto, and by Kami, the expression on his face could make a statue run away in fear. On this, Itachi inquired "What's wrong Naruto-kun?"

Instead of replying, Naruto remained silent and handed over a piece of paper to him. Confused by this behaviour, Itachi confirmed Naruto's identity with the Sharingan and found no signs of the boy being a duplicate.

Respecting the boy's silence, Itachi nodded and wordlessly let the boy turn back and leave. He then moved to an isolated alley and opened the parchment, revealing it to be a note to him, '... From Shisui, but why?'

The handwriting was rushed and uneven but Itachi could make it out as Shisui's since it had slight traces of Shisui's style and was handed over to him by Naruto, Shisui's disciple.

Hello Itachi,

If you are reading this then I am no longer alive.

Itachi's eyes widened noticeably at this 'I see I failed you as well Shisui.'

You may question how I died so I'll tell you, a poison bomb with special toxic properties. Now listen up because I'm getting way too tired to write, I am going to unlock Naruto's Mangekyo Sharingan and give him my eyes in a scroll. Right now it will seem like he killed me. I want you to, since you're already about to kill the clan personally on Danzo's orders,

'I wonder how he knew' Itachi thought somberly.

Try to frame yourself for killing me; Naruto already has too many burdens to carry. Shimura Danzo of the Council attacked me and targeted me to get my Sharingan,

'So that's how he knew' Itachi connected the dots rather quickly. Danzo was pushing for killing the clan, Shisui knew that, if a coup took place the clan would be killed, Itachi wanted to save Sasuke and Nana, Danzo knew that since he was well aware of Shisui's exact mission details, he came to Itachi, and the rest was as Shisui said. He then continued.

He has means to stay under the radar so please be careful around him, I haven’t told Naruto about him and neither did he get a good grasp on his appearance. You are my best friend Itachi, I don't want you to mourn for too long, keep calm always and nothing will take you down.

Regards,
Your Worst Nightmare,
Uchiha Shisui.

P.S. I know this is rushed but give a dying man a break now will you?

A lone tear fell out of Itachi's left eye as he read his best friend's last joke, even at his death bed he knew how to have a good laugh; typical Shisui.

'I suppose I'll have to do what I must to protect Naruto and Sasuke.' Itachi had been convinced that the only way to deal with all his problems was to kill the clan himself. He would no longer fail anyone again; even if he was hated for it. Not after he failed Shisui and...

Flashback
An Uninhabited Island - Mizu no Kuni

"Cut it out Kujou." This was the thirteenth time he said that today.

The scenery was quite appreciable, moderately tall trees, a light mist costing the area, and the blue sea surrounding the island.

"Oh come on Ita-kun, I won't do it ever again if you don't like it" Uchiha Kujou, a girl in her late teens who had long silky black hair. She wore standard Konoha Anbu attire. Her mask off at the moment, strapped to her waist, and could be identified as an Usagi (Rabbit) mask. Currently she was embracing Itachi, her ample bust pressing against his back, a mischievous grin adorning her features.

"Not that I mind," Itachi was a healthy male after all, "but we are currently on a mission and we will end this break soon. I suggest you get ready." Itachi put on his Karasu (Crow) mask as he said that.

Kujou, or rather Usagi since she put on her mask, pouted and lightly mumbled something along the lines of 'Baka boyfriends being too serious about missions for their own good.'

Yes, the two were on a mission, S Rank at that. The objective? Infiltrate the Kirigakure no Sato and collect all relevant information ranging from civil life to Yagura's time table.

Time Skip - One Month

Itachi and Kujou had completed their assignment. They roamed the streets using Genjutsu and Henge (Transformation) to move around undetected. They knew of the rebellion personnel, some of the tactics and general details. They utilized their mastery over stealth and spied on Yagura, the Mizukage. They eavesdropped, captured Ninja and used Genjutsu to make then talk. Basically everything that needed to be done had been done perfectly. The two were currently jumping tree to tree in Kiri's misty forests, intending to get out of Mizu no Kuni (The Land of Water) as fast as possible.

There was just one minor complication... Once they completed the mission and were on their way back, the loyal five of the Kiri no Shinobigatana Shichinin Shū (Seven Ninja Swordsmen of the Mist) had been in the vicinity and had stumbled upon the two Uchiha by chance.

Kuiarare Kushimaru with his Nuibari (Sewing Needle), Ringo Ameyuri with her Kiba (Fangs), Akebino Jinin wielding the Kabutowari (Helmet Splitter), Jinpachi Munashi holding the Shibuki (Splash), and the most surprising of all, wielding the Hiramekarei was...

"Hōzuki Mangetsu, I wonder how you are still part of Yagura's faction." Itachi mused aloud.

"Let's just say that the boss saw use in and declared me a special case, passing me off as something similar to a Jinchuriki like him." Mangetsu replied with a malicious grin.

"It's been ages since we last fought Anbu, last time was when Kisame left." Ameyuri was a bit excited.

"Let's have fun!" Jinpachi exclaimed.

"I'll sew you two into the trees." Needless to say Kushimaru was eager for a fight.

"You won't be able to resist us." Jinin was as confident as ever.

"Karasu, I'll deal with Kushimaru and Mangetsu, you take the others" Usagi had a plan for the Hōzuki.

"Hai, I'll meet up with you when I'm done" Karasu replied.

With Itachi

As soon as Usagi finished, Karasu used three Katon: Gōkakyū no Jutsu (Fire Release: Great Fireball Jutsu) on his targets, Usagi doing the same for hers.

"Hm? You've managed to separate us." Ameyuri mused.

Paying no heed to her mumbling, Karasu was quick to jump a little further away, baiting the others away.
Finding a clearing in the forest, the four landed and glanced at each other's eyes, Sharingan facing the three.

"An Uchiha? This just got a whole lot better!" exclaimed Jinpachi. This was followed by Jinin weaving through hand seals.

Kirigakure no Jutsu (Hidden Mist Technique)

The present mist grew denser until all sight couldn't extend beyond a meter or two. The three quickly moved to strike the now 'useless' Uchiha... They were in for a surprise; Karasu took out his Tanto and redirected Ameyuri's lightning strike towards Jinpachi and sidestepped Jinin's hammer-enhanced slash, quickly dashing out of the area...

An explosion took place. An explosion with lightning sparks glimmering around once the main 'boom' had occurred. When Kiba's lightning struck Shibuki's explosive tags, which were ready to blow...well this was the result.

Karasu kept his guard up...and dodged another strike from Kabutowari from behind. "It seems that you're more skilled than the usual arrogant Uchiha" Jinin complimented and jumped back, Jinpachi landing on his side.

Without a word, the Anbu ducked a lightning bolt aimed at his head. "Skilled indeed. Not only did you escape our combined assault and forced us to use Kawarami (Replacement) to get out of the way, you dodged strikes afterward that would kill even the normal Anbu." Ameyuri landed beside the other swordsmen, impressed at the Uchiha's display of skill.

Getting a handle on their abilities, the Uchiha attempted to speak but was stabbed from the back by Ameyuri, who used a Mizu Shunshin (Water Body Flicker). As Karasu coughed blood, the swordswoman behind him smirked...

... However Karasu broke down into a flock of crows which flew over to a tree branch and reformed into the Anbu.

"What the heck...?" Jinpachi was a bit confused.

"I'm afraid it's time I end thi-" the Uchiha was speaking but was interrupted.

"You're on the losing end here! We were just toying with you earlier." Jinpachi showed some arrogance.

"You are..." Karasu vanished into thin air and appeared behind the swordsmen, who noticed after a long while something wrong with their Chakra Network so formed a ram seal...

The world shattered like glass and the scenery changed to, well back as it was before, but they had a Katon: Gōryūka no Jutsu (Fire Release: Great Dragon Fire Technique) to dodge which they used Chakra enhanced jumps.

Karasu who stood on a tree, now facing the swordsmen who stood on the ground, finished his sentence from the illusion "...already in my Genjutsu."

'Damn, we were almost dead there' Jinin thought.

Nodding at each other, the three followed an unsaid plan and dashed away...

... To the direction of Usagi's fight. 'Damn, I have to hurry' Itachi thought in slight panic.

With Kujou

Things were not going according to plan at all.

Kujou had been confident that her Raiton affinity would assist her against Mangetsu, and if it was one on one she would have won. However there was one issue, Kushimaru and Hiramekarei.

Mangetsu had been more skilled with the blade than she expected and any openings he left were swiftly covered by the wielder of Nuibari.

The tide of the battle was fairly even and no one had the upper hand. Mangetsu had used the Kirigakure no Jutsu (Hiding in the Mist Technique) rendering sight useless. Then it had been Usagi dodging Mangetsu's Chakra strikes and Suika no Jutsu (Hydrification Technique) along with Kushimaru's attempts at piercing her with his sword thrusts and literally sewing her into a tree. Of course she hadn't been idle, she was forcing the Hōzuki to dodge her Raiton Ninjutsu and redirecting Kuiarare in the way of his partner's Chakra Strikes.

This had been the situation until of course all five swordsmen regrouped... 'Where's Karasu...?' She thought for a second but sensed his Chakra moving towards them.

Cursing under her breath, she quickly formed a Kage Bunshin (Shadow Clone)
Katon: Karyū no Hōkō (Fire Release: Roar of the Fire Dragon)
Raiton: Rairyū no Hōkō (Lightning Release: Roar of the Lightning Dragon)


The Clone brought her hand near her mouth putting their hands before their mouth in a pose resembling that of a trumpeter, before releasing the fire, prompting it to be expelled between their fingers. The flames produced started out as a very thin stream, enough to be fit between the user's fingers, before suddenly enlarging to strike the opponents. Usagi herself gathered lightning in her mouth and released it in the form of a destructive blast.

A massive inferno filled with huge lightning bolts moved towards the alarmed swordsmen, who had little choice other than to let the mist dissipate and focus on using a Suiton: Suijinheki (Water Release: Water Formation Wall) to defend themselves.

The water was shot out from their mouths and managed to stop the fire but was completely turned into steam, leaving the lightning moving towards the unfortunate sword wielders. Mangetsu immediately formed a narrow but deep hole in the ground and liquefied, saving his existence for the moment. Ameyuri redirected as much lightning as she could to the sky, however there was still a lot left which was blocked using their swords as shields; some stray bolts managed to hit Mangetsu after being redirected by the swords.

Once things had settled down, all five swordsmen were annoyed at almost being killed back then. Even if the fire was avoided, the damage done by the remaining lightning was equal to being hit head on by a B-Rank Raiton Jutsu like the Raiton: Gian (Lightning Release: False Darkness).

"We'll make you pay for that!" Jinin yelled. Upon that all of the Kiri no Shinobigatana Shichinin Shū (Seven Ninja Swordsmen of the Mist) showed their proficiency in the Silent Killing Technique and vanished into the steam, putting Usagi on guard, she thought a bit panicky 'Damn it! Itachi isn't here yet.'

As soon a she thought that, she was forced to sidestep a hammer powered slash from Jinin...

With Itachi

As soon as he saw the work of Usagi's Ninjutsu, he sped up 'Wait for me Kujou, I'm coming for you.'

When he reached the location of the fight, he felt Kujou's Chakra Signature fading, almost as if... 'Am I too late?' Itachi thought in worry.

The surrounding steam cleared to reveal... 'No' Itachi thought. Kujou had been impaled by simultaneously in the gut by Kushimaru and Ameyuri. The woman drew her sword out while Kushimaru lifted Kujou with his sword and tossed her off it behind him, in Itachi's direction.

Kujou was caught by Itachi, who's disbelieving met Kujou's, "No. This can't be it." Itachi was more than sad; he felt despair. He saw Kujou motioning him to take off his mask, which he did and received a final parting, chaste kiss on the lips.

"Take care of Naruto-kun, Itachi."Kujou coughed and gave her love a wonderful smile, blood leaking through the side of her mouth, "I love you and I'm happy knowing that you feel the same. Forgive me Itachi, this is *cough* the last time." She lifted her index and middle fingers and weakly poked Itachi on the forehead, her hand then falling limp to the ground, eyes closing and a content smile on her face. A lone tear fell from Itachi's right eye.

The swordsmen noticed the scene taking place when it was almost over, Jinpachi laughed...

That was it. Itachi felt something break inside him. He looked up and glared...

... The sight was enough to make the swordsmen shiver. Itachi was downright pissed and was letting it show on his face, his blood adorned face. However that wasn't what scared the swordsmen, no, what scared them were the glowing blood red eyes with a pattern of a three pointed pinwheel in them.

Blood leaked out of Itachi's left eye like crimson tears. Itachi wanted them to burn and burn they did. Unconsciously using Amaterasu (Heavenly Illumination), Itachi first hit Jinpachi with the black flames, burning him in two seconds. He then hit Kushimaru, taking three seconds to turn him to ashes.

The others saw this and moved away, after picking up the swords dropped by their comrades. Mangetsu was entrusted with all the swords and told to flee as they remaining three knew that they wouldn't live to see another day.

Itachi was about to hit Mangetsu but was forced to jump back to dodge a Raiton: Gian (Lightning Release: False Darkness) from Ameyuri.

Figuring that letting one insect go was of no consequence at the moment, he thought of Kujou again for a second, the pain he felt was something he wanted to end; almost as if wanting to enter an illusion to protect himself. As such, Itachi subconsciously used Tsukuyomi (Moon Reader).

The world turned red and black; Ameyuri and Jinin were tied to wooden posts, their arms stretched to their sides, ropes binding each limb and their necks. Two Itachi's came in front of them holding swords. "For the next Forty-Eight hours, I will keep on cutting you with my blade." The two said menacingly in unison.

Real World

Both swordsmen fell to the ground, having severe brain damage. To finish the job Itachi threw a two Kunai at their skulls.

Turning towards the love of his life, Itachi felt confused. On one hand, he has gotten revenge by killing the ones who took her away from him, on the other his heart was hurting so much that he was about to roll over on the ground.

He then remembered all the happy moments he shared with her, one in particular randomly flashing in his mind.

Flashback within a Flashback
Trees at the Edge of the Uchiha Clan Compound – Konoha

"Hey Ita-kun" Kujou called out cheerfully, "let's go on that date you promised me."

Itachi, sitting on a tree branch and resting his back on a tree, jumped down and motioned for Kujou to come over. She did as instructed but was greeted with a forehead poke, courtesy of her boyfriend. "Forgive me Ku-chan, maybe next time."
Pouting at this, Kujou replied in a sing-song tone, “You’re a meanie, I-ta-chi-kun." She then got a bit more serious and asked, "Another mission?"

Shaking his head in negative, Itachi replied "No, I have to go teach Naruto-kun the Bunshin Daibakuha (Clone Great Explosion). We'll have our date on the weekend, wouldn't it be more fitting, milady?"

"Oh stop it you" she joked back, "Naruto-kun, huh? He's a cute kid; I'd like to meet him personally someday."

Flashback within a Flashback – End

'I'm sorry I couldn't have you meet Naruto-kun, Ku-chan. You two would have gotten along quite well.' The Uchiha thought somberly. A lone tear fell out of Uchiha Itachi's right eye. He muttered to no one in particular "I've failed you Ku-chan, I hope you can forgive me." Itachi then formed a tiger hand seal and hardened his heart to burn Kujou's body with a Fire Jutsu; standard Anbu procedure. The 'evolved' Uchiha then proceeded to make his way back to Konoha.

Flashback – End

=====OFR=====
Uzumaki Estate – Konoha

"Naruto-kun sure is la-... Oh Naruto-kun we were just talking about you" Nana said, but received no reply.

Instead Naruto slowly moved on towards his room. "Something has to be wrong" Mea noted.

Following the boy into the room, Nana grabbed his right shoulder and turned him around while Mea lifted his head up for them both to see. The sight left them wishing they didn't see it.

"Oh Kami Naruto-kun, who did this to you?!" Mea exclaimed. Naruto was bruised and had dried tear streaks on his cheeks.

"What happened Naruto-kun?" Nana asked softly.

Instead of a reply, the two were engulfed in a bear hug by Naruto who was holding them as if they would disappear if he let go. Surprised for a second at the sudden action, both girls smiled softly and returned the gesture, whispering soothing words into his ears.

"Nana-chan, you go call Kaa-chan. I'll have Naruto-kun get clean and fed" Mea said seriously getting a nod in return.
Nana quickly dashed outside and left in a Shunshin (Body Flicker). Mea on the other hand convinced Naruto to take a shower and get a change of clothes, while she herself made him some Omurice.

=====OFR=====
Uchiha Clan Compound – Konoha

"... And then Naruto-kun suddenly hugged us, and then, and then" Nana's voice could be heard. It was early night time, around 8:30 pm so no one was at the house at the moment.

"Calm down Nana-chan, I'll just come over with you then. Let's hurry." Mikoto knew how to deal with the situation. The two females then left for the Uzumaki Estate in their Shunshin (Body Flicker).

=====OFR=====
Uzumaki Estate – Konoha


Naruto was sitting at the side of his bed, Mea beside him putting a hand on his shoulder to provide some form of support. Nana and Mikoto entered the room calmly.

Upon seeing Naruto's eyes, Mikoto instantly got a gist of what happened so she asked, "Who was it?"

"Uchiha Shisui" Naruto replied with a blank tone, surprising the girls who never heard him call his mentor's name that way ever before.

Mikoto on the other hand got the message and ushered the two girls out of the room before they could ask questions, she said that she 'would answer them all later.'

Moving beside Naruto, to his right she put an arm over his shoulders and warmly muttered into his war "It's all going to be alright, Shisu-chan wouldn't want you to be so depressed and gloomy."

That was enough for Naruto to break down, he stayed strong for too long; he grabbed his mother figure's shoulders and showed her his Three Tomoe Sharingan and embraced her in a hug.

"There there, it's all going to be just fine." Mikoto tried her best to soothe the broken boy.

Incoherent words were all that escaped Naruto's tongue, though Mikoto could make out 'How' 'I killed him' 'Why me' and such lines amongst them.

Focusing on the 'I killed him', Mikoto made a rough assumption that the two were attacked and Shisui was killed and Naruto blamed himself. Not too far from reality but far enough to be called false. Deciding not to push around, she let the boy empty his worries.

Around ten minutes later, Naruto had fallen asleep crying for the first time in his life. Laying him down to make him feel as comfortable as possible, Mikoto tucked him into bed and left outside after kissing his forehead.

As soon as she came out she was given two inquisitive looks, courtesy of the girls.

"Don't freak out when I say this, Naruto is depressed because Shisui died today" she let a frown betray her emotions which she wanted to hide. The girls in turn widened their eyes and looked a bit depressed, they weren't as close to the man as Naruto so they naturally had a lower shock at the knowledge.

"How is Naruto-kun?" Mea asked, worried.

"Sleeping. I have to go today since it would look suspicious to be out of the compound for too long so late at night. You two take care of him. I'll come over tomorrow morning so you can go to the Academy, I'll have him take a break for at least a week. One more thing, don't pry too much for details right now, he needs to stabilize so it should take a few days before he can give a description of the events without going into further depression." Receiving nods of confirmation in return, Mikoto made her way out of the house.

That night Nana and Mea stayed up beside Naruto but fell asleep on their seats, their heads resting on their arms on Naruto's bed.

... Cut.

So how was this chapter? I hope I got the emotions right, I'm not too sure because I can't relate to the experience of first having nothing, then gaining precious people and then losing those people and being alone again. Needless to say that this is worse than what happened to both Canon Sasuke and Naruto. Nor do I have any experience on how Itachi must have felt.

I'm way to inexperienced to get this perfectly right so I need all of you to write a review and tell me if I could do better and how.

I suppose that's it, oh and I'll show the uploading down a bit considering that this is an important part of the story which can't be rushed. Another thing is that I've uploaded the picture of Kujou .

Jutsu List:
Raiton: Rairyū no Hōkō (Lightning Release: Roar of the Lightning Dragon): A/S Rank (Depending on Chakra Input): Offensive:

The user gathers lightning in their mouth and releases it in the form of a concentrated, destructive blast, capable of destroying everything in a wide area in front of them. A side-effect of being hit by this attack is, if the target survives, the lightning paralyzes them, preventing them from escaping the user's next attack. By moving their head around as they cast it, the user can also employ this spell in an arched trajectory, enabling them to hit enemies that may not be in their direct path.

See you all later,
R&R.


 
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Trea

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I think you did a good job with the emotions for someone who had no experience with it. Also, thank you for not letting Danzo have everything his own way. I love that he was not able to get Shisui's eyes and that Shisui was able to take out the Root squad before he died. While he will get his way with the massacre, it was nice to see some of his plans get ruined.

I always felt that Danzo got the easy way out in the manga. He should have been stripped of all of his eyes, jailed and suffered the loss of his reputation. That would have hurt him much more. In the manga he got to pretend he was sacrificing himself for the good of the village.

Thanks, for the good read.
 

FaHaD 5212

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I think you did a good job with the emotions for someone who had no experience with it. Also, thank you for not letting Danzo have everything his own way. I love that he was not able to get Shisui's eyes and that Shisui was able to take out the Root squad before he died. While he will get his way with the massacre, it was nice to see some of his plans get ruined.

I always felt that Danzo got the easy way out in the manga. He should have been stripped of all of his eyes, jailed and suffered the loss of his reputation. That would have hurt him much more. In the manga he got to pretend he was sacrificing himself for the good of the village.

Thanks, for the good read.
The emotions were the main thing which had me worried, glad to have them done right. The Root squad gets killed by Itachi in Canon (Naruto Shippuden Ultimate Ninja Storm Revolutions: Ninja Escapades) but yes, I also feel the smallest bit of joy in messing with Danzo xd

Danzo was sly and his eyes didn't get revealed to the public so it's only natural that he dies a 'hero' in the eyes of Konoha, something I intend to fix (I won't spoil any further).

The pleasure is all mine, thank you for reading and reviewing ;)

Enjoyed it
Thanks :)
 

Kuroi Honoo

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So even though Naruto has only continued to improve by leaps and bounds, most of the villagers are still against him and this is opposite from that of what Kishimoto did, great job! ^^ While Hiruzen's comment about Danzou was worrisome, I did find it to be amusing at the same time lol I really enjoyed reading the Shisui part of this chapter! =D I liked that we got to see Shisui’s Susanoo :) Wow, Shisui’s death came so suddenly but was also very sad. The scene with Itachi was also sad. It was nice to get a little insight into Itachi’s girlfriend and her name is quite interesting :) I also really liked that their mission takes place in Kiri ^^ The Seven Swordsman against Itachi and Kujou!!! This fight is EPIC!!!!! It’s AWESOME to see Kujou’s arsenal and how she fights ^^ =D Unreal, I was surprised to see that his lover was killed off by the Swordsman! I found it exceptionally heartwarming that Kujou adapted the famous Itachi finger poke :) I loved how you decided to depict all of the swordsman’s deaths as a result of revenge. I thought Mikoto helping Naruto to cope in her natural motherly fashion was really fantastic and the way you ended the chapter was pretty perfect! =D I really couldn’t critique anything. I thought you did a wonderful job with the emotional parts of this chapter. You were right in this chapter being the longest but it was superb ^^ I also appreciated the pictures of the girls and Naruto ;)
 

FaHaD 5212

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So even though Naruto has only continued to improve by leaps and bounds, most of the villagers are still against him and this is opposite from that of what Kishimoto did, great job! ^^ While Hiruzen's comment about Danzou was worrisome, I did find it to be amusing at the same time lol I really enjoyed reading the Shisui part of this chapter! =D I liked that we got to see Shisui’s Susanoo :) Wow, Shisui’s death came so suddenly but was also very sad. The scene with Itachi was also sad. It was nice to get a little insight into Itachi’s girlfriend and her name is quite interesting :) I also really liked that their mission takes place in Kiri ^^ The Seven Swordsman against Itachi and Kujou!!! This fight is EPIC!!!!! It’s AWESOME to see Kujou’s arsenal and how she fights ^^ =D Unreal, I was surprised to see that his lover was killed off by the Swordsman! I found it exceptionally heartwarming that Kujou adapted the famous Itachi finger poke :) I loved how you decided to depict all of the swordsman’s deaths as a result of revenge. I thought Mikoto helping Naruto to cope in her natural motherly fashion was really fantastic and the way you ended the chapter was pretty perfect! =D I really couldn’t critique anything. I thought you did a wonderful job with the emotional parts of this chapter. You were right in this chapter being the longest but it was superb ^^ I also appreciated the pictures of the girls and Naruto ;)
Prejudicial hatred doesn't vanish so easily in my book. Good to see that the comment served its purpose. Those two scenes had me a bit worried because I had no idea if I did them right. I think that I could have made the fight a little better, but I guess its fine.

Thanks for the positive feedback. If you think that anything could be improved, be sure to tell :)
 

Michael92

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That initial remark XD No fair, I want cookies!! >_> I didn't even get the chance to put in my prediction, lmao...

Okay I want to say something. I suppose I've said it before, but for some reason (xd) it seems at times that you are rushing when writing to get things done (apparent in both these last two chapters). There are some silly mistakes like skipped letters and words, broken sentences with words that should not be there (one line had a "get" instead of what should have been a "for" in the sentence for instance), some choppy sentence structures and dialogue and such here and there, but not to such a degree that I can't get the message (though I shouldn't have to focus to realize what you mean). It's still a bit surprising knowing how you improved a few chapters back, and it seems like they are even more common this time around than in previous entries... Again, I suppose it's because of the rush to make the contest, but then again it's still weird to see these repetitive mistakes knowing that you've "begun" to take grammar seriously, hmm... I don't want to seem harsh, but I can't see that anyone else have mentioned this as of yet and I know improvement is always a high priority for the both of us.

Also at times, it feels like I'm reading a flashback from the anime/manga. I know you are trying to go your own way and all, and that you need to have some established scenes that are slightly changed (like the Danzo/Shisui confrontation) though so I guess that will pass once the real storyline/plot begins (everything still somehow feels like an extended prologue... I can't really put my finger on it). But enough skepticism, beside all this the chapter seems fine to me. You mention that this is your longest yet which is a good accomplishment, but don't let length come at the cost of grammar and structure, that's a good thing to remember.

""I'll sew you two into the trees." Needless to say Kushimaru was eager for a fight." He wasn't exactly needless, lmao! That contradicting pun though XD Bravo! =D

Now, the battle you portrayed in the flashback couldn't have been better! I think this might be the highlight action element of this story just yet. Except for the grammatical errors, the fight was superb. I like the fact that you decided to go deeper into the "supposed" lover of Itachi that we never got to hear more of than a vague mention through Obito. Her death and the fight as a whole was the better part of this chapter, although I would have liked the flashback(s) to have come at a different time although I understand that the story demanded it. In my opinion though, fights are always better in real time if you can make room for them, but this was gold. I would argue that most of the Seven Swordsmen of the Mist were actually killed by Might Dai and his 8th gate of death, but then again, this is an alternative storyline after all. Speaking of which, will we ever see Gai and Kakashi in this storyline? xP Maybe even Sakumo and Might Dai are alive here? Hmm...

Overall a good read. This is my rating:

Story - 8/10
Grammar - 6/10 (I'll be strict with this one)
Overall - 7.5/10.

"Needless to say that this is worse than what happened to both Canon Sasuke and Naruto."

I actually beg the difference xd You got to remember that Sasuke lost everything, his mom, father and his entire family, and to complicate that, he also lost them at the hand of his brother. He couldn't have been more messed up. I would rate that above, but I get your point.

I think my review pretty much summed up what you should take into consideration, and I'm glad you decided not to rush the next entry ;)

As for the artwork of Kujou, I didn't know you could do stuff like that? O__o Didn't think you were on deviantart =p

So Mangetsu escaped and is supposedly still alive... And Itachi will go through with the massacre... I'm starting to believe you're going to make some sort of Super Villains Super Squad or something xD I wonder how you plan to turn things out eventually. Anyways, I'll let you brainstorm some and reply to this review in a proper manner. Should be enough to take from here, haha.

Also one last thing. The whole Shisui/Danzo confrontation was very reminiscing of the Ninja Escapades in Ultimate Ninja Storm. I suppose you drew inspiration from there, even the setting and Shisui's green Susano'o.

PS: I suppose I could have pointed out some of the mistakes but then this review would never have been completed. One of the mistakes is when you had Itachi burn two of the 5 swordsmen, then write that the three remaining ones (should be two) left their swords in Mangetsu's care. There are several silly mistakes like this that a simple read-through will fix... Hope I wasn't too harsh and that you found this review somewhat interesting/worthwhile.
 
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Kuroi Honoo

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Prejudicial hatred doesn't vanish so easily in my book. Good to see that the comment served its purpose. Those two scenes had me a bit worried because I had no idea if I did them right. I think that I could have made the fight a little better, but I guess its fine.

Thanks for the positive feedback. If you think that anything could be improved, be sure to tell :)
I agree.

No the chapter was done very well and the fight scene was fantastic. I really like when a writer can pull off a fight scene and you did as such.

I mean besides any misspelled words which happens to the best of us, I can’t really critique anything and of course, you're welcome ;)
 

FaHaD 5212

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That initial remark XD No fair, I want cookies!! >_> I didn't even get the chance to put in my prediction, lmao...

Okay I want to say something. I suppose I've said it before, but for some reason (xd) it seems at times that you are rushing when writing to get things done (apparent in both these last two chapters). There are some silly mistakes like skipped letters and words, broken sentences with words that should not be there (one line had a "get" instead of what should have been a "for" in the sentence for instance), some choppy sentence structures and dialogue and such here and there, but not to such a degree that I can't get the message (though I shouldn't have to focus to realize what you mean). It's still a bit surprising knowing how you improved a few chapters back, and it seems like they are even more common this time around than in previous entries... Again, I suppose it's because of the rush to make the contest, but then again it's still weird to see these repetitive mistakes knowing that you've "begun" to take grammar seriously, hmm... I don't want to seem harsh, but I can't see that anyone else have mentioned this as of yet and I know improvement is always a high priority for the both of us.

Also at times, it feels like I'm reading a flashback from the anime/manga. I know you are trying to go your own way and all, and that you need to have some established scenes that are slightly changed (like the Danzo/Shisui confrontation) though so I guess that will pass once the real storyline/plot begins (everything still somehow feels like an extended prologue... I can't really put my finger on it). But enough skepticism, beside all this the chapter seems fine to me. You mention that this is your longest yet which is a good accomplishment, but don't let length come at the cost of grammar and structure, that's a good thing to remember.

""I'll sew you two into the trees." Needless to say Kushimaru was eager for a fight." He wasn't exactly needless, lmao! That contradicting pun though XD Bravo! =D

Now, the battle you portrayed in the flashback couldn't have been better! I think this might be the highlight action element of this story just yet. Except for the grammatical errors, the fight was superb. I like the fact that you decided to go deeper into the "supposed" lover of Itachi that we never got to hear more of than a vague mention through Obito. Her death and the fight as a whole was the better part of this chapter, although I would have liked the flashback(s) to have come at a different time although I understand that the story demanded it. In my opinion though, fights are always better in real time if you can make room for them, but this was gold. I would argue that most of the Seven Swordsmen of the Mist were actually killed by Might Dai and his 8th gate of death, but then again, this is an alternative storyline after all. Speaking of which, will we ever see Gai and Kakashi in this storyline? xP Maybe even Sakumo and Might Dai are alive here? Hmm...

Overall a good read. This is my rating:

Story - 8/10
Grammar - 6/10 (I'll be strict with this one)
Overall - 7.5/10.

"Needless to say that this is worse than what happened to both Canon Sasuke and Naruto."

I actually beg the difference xd You got to remember that Sasuke lost everything, his mom, father and his entire family, and to complicate that, he also lost them at the hand of his brother. He couldn't have been more messed up. I would rate that above, but I get your point.

I think my review pretty much summed up what you should take into consideration, and I'm glad you decided not to rush the next entry ;)

As for the artwork of Kujou, I didn't know you could do stuff like that? O__o Didn't think you were on deviantart =p

So Mangetsu escaped and is supposedly still alive... And Itachi will go through with the massacre... I'm starting to believe you're going to make some sort of Super Villains Super Squad or something xD I wonder how you plan to turn things out eventually. Anyways, I'll let you brainstorm some and reply to this review in a proper manner. Should be enough to take from here, haha.

Also one last thing. The whole Shisui/Danzo confrontation was very reminiscing of the Ninja Escapades in Ultimate Ninja Storm. I suppose you drew inspiration from there, even the setting and Shisui's green Susano'o.

PS: I suppose I could have pointed out some of the mistakes but then this review would never have been completed. One of the mistakes is when you had Itachi burn two of the 5 swordsmen, then write that the three remaining ones (should be two) left their swords in Mangetsu's care. There are several silly mistakes like this that a simple read-through will fix... Hope I wasn't too harsh and that you found this review somewhat interesting/worthwhile.
You snooze you lose XD

I admit I didn't really do too much proof-reading however I plan on making the next chapter better in this regard.

It's true, I'm just spicing things up right now...spicing thin air...Although the death of Shisui was more of a main dish no? Some seasoning will follow though...

XD I didn't notice it at first... I've outdone myself.

As per what I am going with, an average Genin with the gate of death DID kill some of the past generation (hence why Zabuza was mentioned as a member of this one) but was not strong enough to kill them all.

Hey! I know that you're right on grammar but wasn't the action worthy of a 9? xd (No I'm slightly serious here.)

Okay, so you mentioned Sasuke's situation right? Well first of all, this Naruto's situation is a mixture (both properties present in full force) of Canon Naruto and Sasuke. Now here's Naruto's situation up until now, he was abused physically and mentally until the age of 5, mental abuse still remaining after that, slowly gained a world of people he cared about, Shisui being one of (or the) closest one/s (No, Hiruzen had a responsibility to the village so he wan't Naruto's full-time care taker, Kakashi was broken and Jiraya was a partially broken spy; broken emotionally), once the world got established he lost the initiator i.e. Shisui, Naruto is in pain of the tragedy and is afraid of what might (and I will make it so) happen. So as opposed Sasuke losing everything to a brother, Naruto slowly loses all he's gained and later at the hands of a pseudo-brother whom he sympathises (just a little) with...I don't want to spoil but there'll be torture and immense angst in the future.

I didn't quite make it but I do change eye-colours, hair-colours and such before uploading, I'm a basic Photoshop-per (who knew? xd).

How did you know?! Yes, I intend to make some original villains.

Well that was the only thing that was Canon in the department so I decided to mingle my own ideas with that.

Oh no! It was just fine, I appreciate the honesty really... I'll have to re-write it then... *Sigh*

I agree.

No the chapter was done very well and the fight scene was fantastic. I really like when a writer can pull off a fight scene and you did as such.

I mean besides any misspelled words which happens to the best of us, I can’t really critique anything and of course, you're welcome ;)
I hope, I can compare with your three because it's a bit of a tough contest...
 

Michael92

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You snooze you lose XD

I admit I didn't really do too much proof-reading however I plan on making the next chapter better in this regard.

It's true, I'm just spicing things up right now...spicing thin air...Although the death of Shisui was more of a main dish no? Some seasoning will follow though...

XD I didn't notice it at first... I've outdone myself.

As per what I am going with, an average Genin with the gate of death DID kill some of the past generation (hence why Zabuza was mentioned as a member of this one) but was not strong enough to kill them all.

Hey! I know that you're right on grammar but wasn't the action worthy of a 9? xd (No I'm slightly serious here.)

Okay, so you mentioned Sasuke's situation right? Well first of all, this Naruto's situation is a mixture (both properties present in full force) of Canon Naruto and Sasuke. Now here's Naruto's situation up until now, he was abused physically and mentally until the age of 5, mental abuse still remaining after that, slowly gained a world of people he cared about, Shisui being one of (or the) closest one/s (No, Hiruzen had a responsibility to the village so he wan't Naruto's full-time care taker, Kakashi was broken and Jiraya was a partially broken spy; broken emotionally), once the world got established he lost the initiator i.e. Shisui, Naruto is in pain of the tragedy and is afraid of what might (and I will make it so) happen. So as opposed Sasuke losing everything to a brother, Naruto slowly loses all he's gained and later at the hands of a pseudo-brother whom he sympathises (just a little) with...I don't want to spoil but there'll be torture and immense angst in the future.

I didn't quite make it but I do change eye-colours, hair-colours and such before uploading, I'm a basic Photoshop-per (who knew? xd).

How did you know?! Yes, I intend to make some original villains.

Well that was the only thing that was Canon in the department so I decided to mingle my own ideas with that.

Oh no! It was just fine, I appreciate the honesty really... I'll have to re-write it then... *Sigh*



I hope, I can compare with your three because it's a bit of a tough contest...
So you finally replied to my review huh xD I thought you had forgotten about it at this point in all your busyness xd

I understand... But now I expect the next release to be flawless, no exception :stfu: XD

I thought as much. Taking any "canon" material into consideration for this story is really not realistic at this point xD I have long been unsure what to call this type of story, but with the latest anime release, I get the same vibe from your story as any of the "Road to" stuff in the anime episodes and the movie. It's basically a similar concept I guess =p

I've been strict on the characters lately xD Sure, the action was gold (story and action 8), but I only did an overall grade which I found to be just that. I almost gave Kuroi's last chapter a top grade though, and I already said he outdid himself there. I have however very high hopes for your next entry. Do not fail me, my apprentice ;) xO

Well with all that on the schedule, I can't wait to see it =D I'll judge when I have read those "progressions" in Naruto's life, haha.

Lmao, if anything, I am a basic "photopaint-shoper" xd You seem to be above that.

That's the only way I can see you matching up his potential anyways, haha ;)

If you feel that way then sure. Don't go overboard with rewrites of releases you have released. Instead, focus more time before you release them. I had to stall chapter 7 of my Sage of Six Paths story for days so that I could work in 20 hours of polishing work, something most people would have thrown out the window and just pressed submit xD I feel like that chapter was what truly brought my patient to it's breaking-point however. I felt like retiring on the spot as I sat there working over it again and again xD

I'm not joining this month though so it will be you against Kuroi xD I think that's the one post you forgot to reply or say anything to (the one I posted in the winner's thread some time ago, as well as in last month's contest thread, lmao).

PS: I misread that last part xd Point still stands though XD

PPS: Oh and you forgot my question about Kakashi and Gai (and possibly Jiraiya too since you mentioned him). Will they appear?
 
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