NB Court (S&Y), Case 2: Part 1

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Victim: Hellsbadass
Plaintiff: ~Sanji~
Charge: Rape
Judge: Nexus
Court Reporter: Zise
Baillifs: Scarface, Ragnaroc
Defendant Attourny: Gamahiro
Prosecutor: Yarduat
Jury: Pineapple



Zise: All rise, honorable judge Nexus residing.

Nexus walks into the courtroom, his head devoid of the powdered wig, and sat down behind his podium. As soon as he sat down, everyone else did the same.

Nexus: Let's get this show on the road, shall we?

Yarduat: HI NEXUS!!!

Nexus: And kick him to the curb, while we're at it.

Zise: Today's case; Hellsbadass against ~Sanji~; did I pronounce that right? I don't know how to pronounce the little squiggly lines before and after the letters in your name.

~Sanji~: You don't; you said it perfectly.

Zise: Alright. Would the defendant and plaintiff please come forwards?

Hells and Sanji walked up to their respective places.

~Sanji~ (To Yarduat): I heard you were the best.

Yarduat is shuffling through papers as Sanji is talking to him, and then just throws them all into the air after he can't find what he's looking for.

Yarduat: I guess you could say that. Ooh, look, it's snowing!

~Sanji~ (Inner thoughts): I'm doomed...

Hellsbadass: I wanted a good lawyer.

Gamahiro: I AM a good lawyer!

Hellsbadass: But you lost to that guy...

Hells pointed towards Yard, who was looking up at the giant, heavy 'snowflakes' falling around him.
Gamahiro slouched in his chair.


Gamahiro: Don't remind me...

Nexus: Hellsbadass, you have been accused on the charge of raping Mr. ~Sanji~; how do you plead.

Hellsbadass: Guilty.

Nexus: Of course you are, no one doubted it for a second. Case dismissed.

Pineapple runs through the isle in the courtroom to get behind the jury bench.

Pineapple: Sorry I'm late; what did I miss?

Yarduat: The whole trial.

Pineapple: REALLY!?!?!?

Zise: It's my job to release the official stuff.

Yarduat: Sowwy... Then could you tell Pineapple what he missed?

Zise: ...... The whole trial.

Pineapple: Awww man...! I was really looking forward to being a part of a jury... Speaking of which, where is the rest of the jury?

Nexus: Everyone else was smart enough to get out of jury duty. Now sit there and be bored out of your mind.

Zise: But the trial is-

Nexus: I'M PUNISHING HIM FOR BEING LATE!!!!

Pineapple takes a seat.

Pineapple: Well, it's better than dealing with Yarduat...

Nexus's eye twitches.

Nexus (Inner thoughts): Who am I punishing; me or him?

Yarduat appears beside Nexus and catches him off guard.

Yarduat: Hey Nexus-sama-sensei-senpai-san-sama... Kuuuuun!!!

Nexus's eye twitches and he lays his head down on his podium while shaking.

Nexus (Inner thoughts): It's just a genjutsu... Yeah, that's it... A genjutsu...

Yarduat: Nope! This is all too real!

Nexus lifted his head up slowly and stared Yarduat in the eye.

Nexus (Inner thoughts): Sit. Down. NOW!!!!!

Yarduat sat down on the floor before Nexus's podium.

Nexus: AWAY FROM ME!!! What happened to my restraining order!?!?!?

Ragnaroc: Oh, guess that's us...

Scarface: Guess so.

Scar and Rag draged Yarduat back to his seat away from Nexus.

Yarduat: Wheeee...!

Nexus stared at Yarduat.

Nexus: O_O Riiiight... Now, onto the case-

Hellsbadass: But I already admitted that I'm guilty...

Nexus: But I'm punishing Pineapple.

Pineapple: For what?

Nexus: ........ Do not question me!

Yarduat: So, shall we begin?

Nexus (Inner thoughts): I plan on taking all of my stored up aggression from Yarduat out on Pineapple...

Yarduat: Knew it!

Nexus: HOW DO YOU KEEP READING MY THOUGHTS!?!?

Yarduat: ...Your thought bubble...

Nexus: I don't have a thought bu-

Nexus looks up, sees a thought bubble, and lays his head back down on his podium and starts shaking.

Nexus (Inner thoughts): Yep... Defenately a genjutsu...

~Sanji~: Yard, I'm nervouse...

Yarduat: Why?

Sanji looks over to Hells who is looking at him with his rapeface on.

~Sanji~: No reason!

Hells then laughs and turns away.

Yarduat: I'll handle this...

Yarduat walks over to Hells and taps him on his shoulder.

Hellsbadass: What?

Yarduat: You might not want to mess with ~Sanji~.

Hellsbadass: And why is that?

Yarduat: ~Sanji~ is one of the best fighters on NB, that's why!

Hellsbadass: Is that so?

~Sanji:~ Yard, what are you doing!?

Yarduat doesn't pay attention to Sanji and keeps talking.

Yarduat: Yeah, he'll waste you're sorry ass. They won't be able to post it in a thread, it'll be so brutal!

~Sanji~: YARD, NO!

Yarduat: Hush, ~Sanji~... I'm speaking for you.

Hellsbadass: Well, if this is true, then I guess we'll just have to fi-

Nexus: NO ONE IS FIGHTING ANYBODY!!!

Gamahiro: Yeah. It wouldn't be a fight anyways; it would just be Hells raping ~Sanji~ for 50 posts.

Pineapple: Wait, 50 posts?

Hellsbadass: I like to play with my meat...

Yarduat: I'm sure you d-

Nexus: EVERYONE SHUT THE, F*** UP!!!

Zise turns to Nexus who is breathing heavily and is on the verge of snapping from annoyance.

Zise (To Nexus): I think we'd better continue with the case...

END
 
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