As you point out it has always been this way and is not going to change. If you want less lovey-dovey stuff and more grit and hardcore violence then Naruto is not the manga for you.
So you think a shounen manga (pg-13) should resemble an R-rated adult tv show?
First off, Naruto has not always been lovey-dovey. The reason i got into this show to begin with was the first fight with the ninja swordsman from the mist. In that fight the anime did a great job of showing the fear, anxiety, strategy, and risks of being a ninja. I was so captured by this one arc I could not stop watching naruto. So no, this lovey dovey stuff has NOT been around since episode one.
Second, you can show death (among other things) and still be pg-13. You know how i know? because they have already done so. But i find it stupid how 1 ninja dies every 100 chapters in a world full of ninjas. Furthermore, this whole War arc has been the most unrealistic war of all.
And yes, i think i have the right to complain that the show naruto has lost its essence. What used to be a show about ninjas has become a soap opera of love.