I don't even anymore...

Fountain

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So like, in case you didn't know, i'm like the most (or one of the most) miserable member('s) on this site. I'm a friendless forever alone guy who lives in cage yadda yadda yadda, i'm a complete loser you get the point, and no i'm not an emo, my life just sucks ok. So anyway, i got emotional a few weeks ago and posted an entire wall on deviantart about my life, i didn't want to but if you wanna get help you gotta let yourself be helped in the first place right? right? so i did it, i shamefully posted that thread. And one of the comments, a really nice person, gave me some advice, said i should get out of my room more often, try harder to socialize, and that love would come when it comes and i shouldn't be looking for it.

I haven't had any luck going outside to make friends etc. and i'm not exactly looking for love, it comes when it comes, that's what they told me. However... today i went to the Chinese restaurant and the message i got from the fortune cookie reads like this:

He who waits to do a great deal of good all at once, will never do anything.

I guess that's why i haven't achieved anything so far, because i'm drowning in my sorrows waiting for everything to come to me. But if i don't have any luck trying either and i shouldn't be looking for love and let it come to me, then what the hell am i supposed to do. It's neither one or the other? what then?

:wesobi:
 

Hachiman

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Nothing comes for you. You need to go and achieve it whether its love or making friends. Don't believe in luck it's just a null factor in your life which rarely comes. What you need is our own effort rather than crying over what an Unlucky person I am. You don't need luck to make friends . You need to believe in yourself and boost your confidence . Yo never gonna achieve anything if you think this way. **** the fortune cookie and man up ***** :)
 

chibi kyuubi

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Just chill out and stay in the moment. If you are thinking all the time, your not living. Plus you have to be in it to win it. Life don't happen at home, it's in the world. Go out and focus on being there in the moment. Every second your a new person and only the present moment really matters. Go be yourself. You'll do fine
 

Adam Driver

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Stop saying your life sucks just go out or stay inside and think about something your passionate in and embrace that eventually you will meet people who share the same interest as you. There's people around the world homeless and starving, their lives suck. I don't mean to sound harsh but I don't agree with this excuse as to not finding friends or acceptance. It's good though that you now understand the mindset if you want something you need to go and get it not wait for something that may never appear.

I'll be your friend if you'd like as a start. It's as simple as talking to people.
 

Ciao

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how old are you
 

GinkgoLeaf Girl

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One step at a time. The message in the fortune cookie isn't an all-encompassing answer; neither is the other piece of advice. You'll have to find out for yourself which one to follow and when. Take a few deep breaths and believe in yourself--you can do it!
 

Fountain

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Just chill out and stay in the moment. If you are thinking all the time, your not living. Plus you have to be in it to win it. Life don't happen at home, it's in the world. Go out and focus on being there in the moment. Every second your a new person and only the present moment really matters. Go be yourself. You'll do fine

Yeah, maybe i shouldn't be thinking so much.

Stop saying your life sucks just go out or stay inside and think about something your passionate in and embrace that eventually you will meet people who share the same interest as you. There's people around the world homeless and starving, their lives suck. I don't mean to sound harsh but I don't agree with this excuse as to not finding friends or acceptance. It's good though that you now understand the mindset if you want something you need to go and get it not wait for something that may never appear.

I'll be your friend if you'd like as a start. It's as simple as talking to people.

That's another thing that keeps me going other than my small family, knowing that no matter how bad everything is there are always others out there in the world that are worst.

how old are you

No idea. Early 20's
 

Netflix and Chill

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How is it that you could talk and socialize on here but have a hard time doing so irl?
 

Dannie

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How is it that you could talk and socialize on here but have a hard time doing so irl?

It's much easier to discuss about ones problems on the internet than in real life. At least then, you won't be given the harsh criticism by people that you are associated with in person versus anonymously posting it on a forum.
 

JENchuuriki

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Don't sulk it won't help you in any way, you'll feel worthless and depressed even more! Who else will help you other than yourself?? NONE. So help yourself. Love yourself - JB says :lmao:

No, seriously. I think I have read you post relating to this. How old are you anyway??

'cause before when I was, I think in my elementary days - I lack confidence (even now... a bit lol). But you see, no one will help you or like you ... if you don't like/love yourself too.
 

The Work

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Screw that fortune cookie and go out mate.

Socializing might be hard but it will get better and everything will fall into place.
 

Pumpkin Ninja

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I always wonder, how the hell does one make friends let alone be in a relationship outside of school?

I'm almost in the same situation as you, and I do get depressed about it, but it might be easier for me since I'm still 18.

Honestly, you just got to do what you enjoy, and if you really wanna change, you have to make an effort to meet people.
 

GinkgoLeaf Girl

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It's much easier to discuss about ones problems on the internet than in real life. At least then, you won't be given the harsh criticism by people that you are associated with in person versus anonymously posting it on a forum.

There is some truth in this. Although, people can just as easily say harsh, if not harsher, things on the internet than in person. The anonymity can work both ways.
 

Marin

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Lmao never trust fortune cookies.

Anyway, nothing will come to you. Even if you go outside (I mean would you befriend a random stranger for no reason at all?) Friends youll likely never find but people to hang out with? Thats easy. Just start with the internet, get your online mate to meet you and do something you met over in the first place.

I met a friend of mine by posting a "searching for YGO players" post on Facebook. :sdo: Just get some hobby that you'd think people you're in contact are into and boost a relationship around that.

I'm sure everyone has a hobby and contacts they got through that hobby.
 

baul 24

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Here ya go lengthy but may be useful life hacks


LOVE - Invariably, a gateway to Heartbreak!

1) Expectation is the root of all heartache! - Never underestimate a person’s ability to disappoint you.

2) Loving others more than yourself might be a dangerous proposition - Invariably, you’ll end up being taken for granted.

3) The problem with always putting others first is that - you’ve taught them you come second!

4) ‘Love Selflessly’ doesn’t apply to this modern world.

5) When you care for someone (or love someone) more than what they deserve, you get hurt more than what you can endure.



TRUST - But not with your eyes closed!

6) Trust, but not beyond a limit - Even if the person in question is your special someone. Sooner or later, you’ll know why.

7) When you trust someone completely, you get either of the 2 results : a person for life, or a lesson for life!



FRIENDS or F.R.I.E.N.D.S ?

8) Most of whom you call friends are at best, just acquaintances - They’ll only show up until you’re successful, not when life decides to screw you up. So, stop worrying about them.

9) True friends are rare, and are seldom found.

Identification ? Well, as the old saying goes : “A friend in need is a friend indeed!”



‘MOVING ON’ - GET BUSY LIVING, OR GET BUSY DYING!!
(Breakups, and the terrible phase we go through after that!)

10) Love in your 20’s is mostly just a farce. Don’t end up believing that you’re going to spend the rest of your life with them. They came in your life and they left, but it was all for a reason!

“Nothing ever goes away until it has taught us what we need to know!”

11) ‘Moving on’ should not be an option; it should be a PRIORITY!

Priority Level 5 !!

12) Not everything in this life is meant to be how you’d like it to be or want it to be.

13) ‘Break-up’ is seemingly the worst thing that can happen to you in Life. Only ‘seemingly’ !

In reality, however, it is the best thing that can happen to you.

Trust me when I say, in the long run, even Break-ups have a purpose. They only make you mature, wiser and stronger. And DETERMINED! And SUCCESSFUL !!

14) PAST CANNOT CHANGE! - So, stop pondering over it, and stop worrying about it! (You’ll never meet a strong person with an easy past).

What you can do best, instead, is SAVE YOUR ‘FUTURE’! And for that you’re gonna have to make your ‘PRESENT’ count! ,

15) FORGIVE, DON’T FORGET!

16) Feeling are like waves - We cannot stop them from coming to us, but we sure can choose which ones to surf on!

17) ACCEPT IT!


18) If instead of a priority, someone makes you an option, make sure that he/she is soon history, lost and forgotten!

19) Be happy in front of the people you don’t like, it kills them! :p

20) There is time in letting your life revolve around someone else. But today, let it revolve around you. - ‘Your time’ is limited; don’t waste it living someone else’s life.



PEOPLE - Learn to read them!

21) For most part of your 20’s, you live with the belief that you know people.

And then, THEY SURPRISE YOU !!

22) Most people have 2 faces : the one you see, and the one they don’t want you to see - Get conversant with the easy identification of the latter, and as soon as possible. OR else, you’re gonna find yourself under some serious trouble!

23) ‘Honesty’ is a very expensive gift. Don’t expect it from ‘Cheap’ people.

24) Talk sense to a fool, and he calls YOU a Foolish!

25) Never approach a bull from the front, a horse from the rear, and an idiot from any direction!

26) Do whatever the **** you want to do. Because in the end, people are *******s and will judge you anyway!



LIFE - is always a *****! Or, is it? ;-)

27) “Me : I’m finally happy!

Life : Lol . . . wait a sec!!”
.

.

“STORY OF OUR LIVES!!”

28) Life is not a having and a getting, but a being and a becoming.



“Heartbreak : THE REVIVAL”

29) No one in this world has the power to shatter your dreams, unless you give it to them!

30) The past can’t hurt you anymore, NOT UNLESS you let it !!

31) Question your goals, NEVER YOUR WORTH!!

32) You’ll have bad times; but in the end, it will always be to wake you up to the good things you weren’t paying attention to!

33) All good things take time! - “If good things were that easy to find, they wouldn’t be worth finding. Would they? ;-)”



“Moving On - An Inspiration/A Motivation”

34) NEVER CONFUSE a SINGLE DEFEAT by a FINAL DEFEAT!

35) The will to win is not nearly as important as the will to prepare to win!

36) No one rises suddenly in this world - NOT EVEN THE SUN!!

Success is not achieved overnight. It comes in installments; you get a little bit today, a little bit tomorrow until the whole package is given out. The day you procrastinate, you lose that day’s success!



“Moving On - A Success Story!”

37) You are what you do, not what you say you’ll do!

38) Some dream of it, while others stay awake and work for it.

39) Let them sleep while you toil. Let them party while you work.

THE DIFFERENCE WILL SHOW !!


In the end - NEVER GIVE UP!


40) ‘THE PAIN of REACHING YOUR GOAL’ will only last a short while. However, ‘THE PAIN of NOT TRYING’ will last a LIFETIME!

41) It is NEVER TOO LATE TO BE WHAT YOU MIGHT HAVE BEEN!

42) The beginning of your story doesn’t make you who you are


THE END DOES !!


and finally, the last one (and arguably, the best out of ‘em all). . . (phew!)

43) At any given point in Life, YOU SHOULD have the power to say :

“This is NOT how the STORY’S GOING TO END!!”

Cheers! :)
 

Callypigia

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I am a little unclear how posting artwork on Deviant Art is your way of asking for help. Please clarify. That comment that was left for you was definitely good counsel. Our thoughts and behaviors are directly linked to our emotions (well the reuptake process of neurotransmitters...but anyway). Here is a brief clinical psychoeducational course:

Work on identifying rational and irrational thoughts, and then remove irrational. Rational: I haven't made any friends. I am feeling depressed. Irrational: I haven't made any friends because "I'm a loser and my life sucks."
--The reality is, it is hard (unless you live in a college dorm) to make friends when you don't leave your house and put yourself out into the community.

Thought Reframing. Original thought: I'm not in a relationship; I'm a horrible person. No one wants to date me or be my friend. Reframed thought: I'm definitely going through a slump now. Everyone has periods where they feel like that. This is a good time to learn to appreciate myself and if someone else sees my value, good for them, if not I will learn to enjoy my own company.

Stop Catastrophizing. Example: Everyone hates me. Everything is awful. I don't deserve any friends. -- Stray away from extreme thoughts; that "all or nothing" mentality.

Thought Stopping. Learn to recognize and quickly stop negative thoughts that impact your overall outlook on life; out of sight-out of mind.

Behaviors:
Start exercising - Exercise boosts mood, increases production of Serotonin and Dopamine. It also boosts self confidence. It gets you outside so you get some Vitamin D.

Start eating well - When we get depressed we tend to gravitate toward the salty foods, or sugary snacks and high fats. Cut those out of your diet. Your brain needs well balanced nutrients. It will create a cycle of poor energy/lethargy.

Force yourself to talk to new people - What's the worst that can happen? If they reject you, you don't have to reject you. That's on them.

Get outside! - The world doesn't revolve around us, and definitely not our room.

Force yourself to smile more - People who smile are found to be smarter, friendlier, and more attractive. If you don't feel like smiling, just do it. Practice smiling in the mirror. The more we smile, the better we feel.

Don't try to illicit sympathy - It's ok to have a pity party once in awhile...just don't make yourself a permanent party goer. People gravitate toward confidence. Work to act as if you are happy. The cliche saying goes, "Fake it till you make it." Also, people who have a "I'm a loser" sign over there head may attract selfish people who wish to take advantage of it.

There's a good beginning. Good luck! You get out of life what you put into it.

:pekoms2:
 

Jazzy Stardust

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well Cally slayed this. all i would like to add is love may come to you. but if youre not aware of it and not looking for it, you can easily miss it when it does show up
 

HashiraMadara

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I grew up too poor to notice those. I was out and about everyday to ignore hunger, I would only realise there is no food when I come back home. So my life style forced me to be a social maniac.

I can easily make friends because it's what I grew up with. My situation never gave me the luxury to sit on the net(couldn't afford it) and sulk, immediately after school, I used to throw my bag in the bed, an run outside to play with mudballs, dreaming of a day where we could afford cakes and not having to wait for our birthdays for it. playing cricket, soccer, wire cars etc. starting trouble with old neighbours and run away from them, stealing peaches from neighbour trees, GOD DAMN those were the days. Even now, that we all are old, when we get together, shit happens. We puke at cabs drunk and run etc...
 
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