Hashirama: There we go!
Madara: What?
Hashirama: I totally beat you once more in a game of throwing rocks over a small pond, new best friend. Now let's meet up here tomorrow and pretend there isn't any sexual tension between us.
Madara: Sounds good overly friendly stranger with weird hairdo! I'm normally super grumpy but I will begin to open up by just being in your presence! Although I will start developing a serious superior complex soon!
*Next day*
Madara: I managed to skip the stone all the way over to the other end.
Hashirama: I suppose this is a good time to tell you I'm a Senju.
Madara: This somehow changes everything, but our quickly growing friendship makes me feel confused. I would add another feeling but my Uchiha mind only allows me to feel one feeling at a time.
*At the Uchiha camp*
Madara: Father, why are we fighting the Senju?
Uchiha Stereotype1: You know, that has never been explained satisfactorily.
Madara: So how about we cease the fighting? I mean it seems kind of stupid, shouldn't we just join forces and rule everything?
Uchiha Stereotype1: No, because one day, a guy from that clan will be able to summon trees.
Madara: What does that have to do with anything?
Uchiha Stereotype1: Apparently everything. Now I'm going to give you a spanking because you have been hanging out with a guy with a bowl cut. You really should know better.
Madara: Emotional trauma!
*A few days later*
Izuna: Hey bro, isn't it great how close we are?
Madara: You said it! I'm glad that you are going to play such a monumental role in this series.
*A few years later*
Madara: Rage, hatred and corny dialogue!
Hashirama: Corny dialogue, attempt to save you from yourself!
Madara: Contempt and pride! Attack!
Hashirama: Serious ass-handing! Too naive to kill you!
Madara: Something about power, wounded pride. Oh no, my eyes are failing me!
Izuna: Here you go!
Madara: Oh thanks. Oh, somehow I am much stronger now.
Izuna: Bleh!
Madara: He died! Somehow this is your fault Hashirama! I am now going to take control of your DNA, transfer it into myself, grow an army, brainwash a small child and then create a utopia where every single being on the planet has to live, where me and my brother can be together for all time.
Hashirama: That's kind of...twisted.
*More time passes!*
Mito: All the fans want yet another love triangle, so I'm here and have absolutely nothing important to say. Also, I'm totally into Hashirama.
Madara: Oh no, Mito! My one true love! Oh, this makes me even stronger! With the power of a renewed sympathetic fanbase I shall rule this world! Hey, Nine-Tails!
Nine-Tails: Yeah?
Madara: If you were to be put under a genjutsu, what would you do?
Nine-Tails: Well I am literally made of chakra so I don't see how it would affect me, nor how any genjutsu would be powerful enough to...
Madara: Lol!
Nine-Tails: Well **** my life.
Hashirama: This gives me the idea to evenly distribute chakra monsters to all villages where they'll put them into the bodies of mentally unstable children in order to maintain peace, even though there are individuals who can go toe-to-toe with them, I'm sure this will somehow prevent rivaling villages in the future from killing each other. Let's just hope they can't be persuaded with one single passionate speech and ruin my great plans.
Madara: Well that's kind of...twisted. Anyway, let's fight.
Hashirama: I'm coming Madara!
Madara: What? Ew, get away from me!
Hashirama: Where do you think you're going?! Watch me summon something with a ridiculous amount of arms!
Madara: That's strangely erotic.
Hashirama: Madara!
Madara: Hashirama!
Madara: What?
Hashirama: I totally beat you once more in a game of throwing rocks over a small pond, new best friend. Now let's meet up here tomorrow and pretend there isn't any sexual tension between us.
Madara: Sounds good overly friendly stranger with weird hairdo! I'm normally super grumpy but I will begin to open up by just being in your presence! Although I will start developing a serious superior complex soon!
*Next day*
Madara: I managed to skip the stone all the way over to the other end.
Hashirama: I suppose this is a good time to tell you I'm a Senju.
Madara: This somehow changes everything, but our quickly growing friendship makes me feel confused. I would add another feeling but my Uchiha mind only allows me to feel one feeling at a time.
*At the Uchiha camp*
Madara: Father, why are we fighting the Senju?
Uchiha Stereotype1: You know, that has never been explained satisfactorily.
Madara: So how about we cease the fighting? I mean it seems kind of stupid, shouldn't we just join forces and rule everything?
Uchiha Stereotype1: No, because one day, a guy from that clan will be able to summon trees.
Madara: What does that have to do with anything?
Uchiha Stereotype1: Apparently everything. Now I'm going to give you a spanking because you have been hanging out with a guy with a bowl cut. You really should know better.
Madara: Emotional trauma!
*A few days later*
Izuna: Hey bro, isn't it great how close we are?
Madara: You said it! I'm glad that you are going to play such a monumental role in this series.
*A few years later*
Madara: Rage, hatred and corny dialogue!
Hashirama: Corny dialogue, attempt to save you from yourself!
Madara: Contempt and pride! Attack!
Hashirama: Serious ass-handing! Too naive to kill you!
Madara: Something about power, wounded pride. Oh no, my eyes are failing me!
Izuna: Here you go!
Madara: Oh thanks. Oh, somehow I am much stronger now.
Izuna: Bleh!
Madara: He died! Somehow this is your fault Hashirama! I am now going to take control of your DNA, transfer it into myself, grow an army, brainwash a small child and then create a utopia where every single being on the planet has to live, where me and my brother can be together for all time.
Hashirama: That's kind of...twisted.
*More time passes!*
Mito: All the fans want yet another love triangle, so I'm here and have absolutely nothing important to say. Also, I'm totally into Hashirama.
Madara: Oh no, Mito! My one true love! Oh, this makes me even stronger! With the power of a renewed sympathetic fanbase I shall rule this world! Hey, Nine-Tails!
Nine-Tails: Yeah?
Madara: If you were to be put under a genjutsu, what would you do?
Nine-Tails: Well I am literally made of chakra so I don't see how it would affect me, nor how any genjutsu would be powerful enough to...
Madara: Lol!
Nine-Tails: Well **** my life.
Hashirama: This gives me the idea to evenly distribute chakra monsters to all villages where they'll put them into the bodies of mentally unstable children in order to maintain peace, even though there are individuals who can go toe-to-toe with them, I'm sure this will somehow prevent rivaling villages in the future from killing each other. Let's just hope they can't be persuaded with one single passionate speech and ruin my great plans.
Madara: Well that's kind of...twisted. Anyway, let's fight.
Hashirama: I'm coming Madara!
Madara: What? Ew, get away from me!
Hashirama: Where do you think you're going?! Watch me summon something with a ridiculous amount of arms!
Madara: That's strangely erotic.
Hashirama: Madara!
Madara: Hashirama!
