[Discussion] Have any of you been cheated before in the past?

Ensifer

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Just a curiosity question to anyone else who may had to cope with this periodically throughout a chunk of their life, but I was actually wondering if anyone else here has, at one point in their life, been cheated by someone that they truly loved and still having a tad bit of trouble coping with their lives afterwards.

I won't share much, but late in 2013 that was the case with me, as I lost my girlfriend(who'm I view as the one and was actually planning on taking it a step farther next year) who ran off with her ex in one sudden night along with ordering me never to speak to her again as she cut all form of communication with me, which left me emotionally traumatized. Even though I have learned to mainly cope with it, unfortunately it still periodically appears in the back of my mind when I see couples around my age enjoying themselves, and having nightmares(trust me, I hate them) that consistently keep reminding me of her when I personally don't want to.

Anyways back on topic, anyone else that had such a traumatizing experience in their respective lives? And if so, how did you all manage to cope with it?
 
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Draw

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Didn't read. I probably was toward the last month of my relationship.

Don't question it, you'll never know at the end of the day. You'll drive yourself mad. Took me like half a year to get passed my ex. I'll never put that much mental strain on myself for a woman again. Didn't eat full meals for a quarter of the year. Time heals all. Exercise is great relief. And girls are *****es

Edit: read the thread. Had serious plans w this girl too, dated for 2 years and some change, and her ego and immaturity drove us off the cliff where we were. There are great girls out there, but they're mostly insane. My last piece of advice is when you're in a relationship you're so busy being XY that you both can lose sense of being X and Y. It is great to be free from attachment and being bound to something 24/7 in life. I have the rest of my life to be married lpl
 
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Solidus Solidus Solidus

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Didn't read. I probably was toward the last month of my relationship.

Don't question it, you'll never know at the end of the day. You'll drive yourself mad. Took me like half a year to get passed my ex. I'll never put that much mental strain on myself for a woman again. Didn't eat full meals for a quarter of the year. Time heals all. Exercise is great relief. And girls are *****es
Basically this.
 

Ensifer

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Didn't read. I probably was toward the last month of my relationship.

Don't question it, you'll never know at the end of the day. You'll drive yourself mad. Took me like half a year to get passed my ex. I'll never put that much mental strain on myself for a woman again. Didn't eat full meals for a quarter of the year. Time heals all. Exercise is great relief. And girls are *****es
Oh believe I been attempting my best to forget about her and actually have since the previous year, the only problem are the constant nightmares that ticks me from time to time, almost as if my brain is trying to play tricks with me. As for exercise and finding means to keeping myself occupied that's already being done due to my travels and work.

As for girls, I truly believe though most around their early 20's are ... questionable with their relationship decisions.
 

Obito the supreme jin

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This same type of mess happened to me 2 weeks ago and I don't think I have gotten fully out of it. What's weird was I caught her cheating and then we discussed about it. She was all like this isn't going to work and I was like **** you I am done.

Another time was when I ran away from the cops for some shit that was my friend's fault. My friend persuaded me and couple of other guys to go in the bar and start messing with the waiter and spilling the wine and stuff. The cops were there and thank god we both made it out. I still had nightmares about it. Its easy to surrender but its hard to run away and not think about it.
 

ROHAN

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Not experienced this yet.

As I said before, the best way to cope with it is A) Get a new Girlfriend/Boyfriend so that you can start afresh or B) Distract yourself with travelling, Jobs, etc.
 

Yubel

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Oh believe I been attempting my best to forget about her and actually have since the previous year, the only problem are the constant nightmares that ticks me from time to time, almost as if my brain is trying to play tricks with me. As for exercise and finding means to keeping myself occupied that's already being done due to my travels and work.

As for girls, I truly believe though most around their early 20's are ... questionable with their relationship decisions.
It reminds me of the saying "We're too soon old and too late smart" it goes for life in general, not just in relationships.
 

Draw

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Oh believe I been attempting my best to forget about her and actually have since the previous year, the only problem are the constant nightmares that ticks me from time to time, almost as if my brain is trying to play tricks with me. As for exercise and finding means to keeping myself occupied that's already being done due to my travels and work.

As for girls, I truly believe though most around their early 20's are ... questionable with their relationship decisions.
It's just hard to find true love in college or mid 20's people are too busy wanting to fornicate with every being on the planet before its time to grow the f up. I had nightmares too man, I dreamt about her on average for 4 days a week. I never wanted to wake up, mornings were the worst. Girls do such ducked up shit with no regard and cause mental damage to men, certainly there are men who are dicks too but those are ducking scum bags that the girl should've been smart enough to not deal w in the first place.

Bottom line is: post relationships are definitely a period of time in ones life where they are probably least mentally healthy. I remember always saying "this shit just isn't healthy" daily
 

BlazeRelease

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nope. I've only been in one relationship and I'm still in it. but i could imagine how bad it would feel to be cheated on, especially if you was to really care for that person.

the best i can say is that sometimes you can never really understand people. you might think you know someone but they can be a completely different person, or they can change. but whats important is to not let a bad relationship change you for the worse. in your next relationship, you have to be just as trusting, and can't doubt another persons faithfulness out of fear they will do you wrong. don't lose your ability to trust, and try to accept the fact that your previous relationship wasnt the one for you, because they weren't good enough. they cheated.

if you are still trying to get over it, remember that time heals wounds. in the mean time, try to find something productive to do for yourself, and try not to rush into anything.
 

Urda

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Not experienced this yet.

As I said before, the best way to cope with it is A) Get a new Girlfriend/Boyfriend so that you can start afresh or B) Distract yourself with travelling, Jobs, etc.
The guy is saying distractions are not helping as the nightmares occuring. He is best to seek professional help.

If this is hitting him this bad, I advice him not to jump into a relationship. I think he should "mingle" around, until he show recover.
 

ROHAN

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Oh believe I been attempting my best to forget about her and actually have since the previous year, the only problem are the constant nightmares that ticks me from time to time, almost as if my brain is trying to play tricks with me. As for exercise and finding means to keeping myself occupied that's already being done due to my travels and work.

As for girls, I truly believe though most around their early 20's are ... questionable with their relationship decisions.
After some consideration, on the two facts : 1) You were emotionally traumatized and 2) You get Nightmares regarding it; I can suggest three courses of Action :-

A) Get a new Girlfriend and move on : While this option might seem the easy way out, it's not as simple as it sounds. If the relationship fails then it will backfire on you very badly. It's best to play safe and ensure that it's your GF who intends to primarily drive the relationship (Not you) and actually shows interest. You should wait it out and wait for a girl to approach you and show interest. Of course you will have to have a few cool points in order to achieve that.

B) Spend time with your family : The best possible course of Action is to spend your time with family. Your family has blood relations with you and will never abandon you and run away unlike your Previous girlfriend. The emotional bonds between you and your family will heal the mental wound eventually. You can compare this situation to a Kid a watching a Horror movie. He will be scared if he goes to bed Alone, but if he sleeps with his parents, the fear dissapears.

C) Go and consult a mental psychiatrist or someone who can help you deal with your mental problems. The most Drastic and Last Resort Case of Action if you can't get out from the Emotional Pitfall.
 

YowYan

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Never been cheated on. But then, I've only had one lasting relationship and some dates.

Speaking about a crush/true love though..I had my best friend at the time backstab me by dating her xd
But I don't blame him. I blame my then lack of insight of seeing through people before they can hurt me and lack of balls to properly interact with girls that I fell for.

No boohoo'ing, just move on
 

00Rinne

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Damn! That's messed up fam! It's never happen to me but the thing people seem to miss is that the attention span of the average person has dropped massively in the last 20 years. There is too much going on now to keep the one your with interested in you. So my advice to you in the future is to find something to do to keep the one your with interested in you otherwise you'll lose them to someone who will.

There's always someone who is doing better than you and always someone with more money than you, so the best thing to do is keep busy with the one your with an try to have fun as much as you can. ( That has worked for me )
 
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