Explaining the Senju/Hashirama DNA infection Pandemic -> Use OSX, Get Cancer!

Satsujinki

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Short story, above image sums it all up. Ok, now for the long version...

if you think about it, it seems the Senju clan of Hashirama's time (a tradition Tsunade seemed to carry on) were pretty well-versed into Medicine. Tobirama created zombie-apocalypse no jutsu all by himself, a feat that certainly required no small amount of knowledge onto the workings of life and death (and afterlife, but well, that's something else entirely).

Hashirama himself seemed well-prosed into such arts, as well. Madara described Hashirama's ability to heal himself without hand seals as quite noteworthy... And more importantly, later noted the similarities between Tsunade's healing ability and those of her ancestor.

If you read the entry for on Narutopedia, it states that using it results in the shortening of one's lifespan, due to the . Although there's one thing that couldn't care less for Hayflick Limits...

Yup.. Cancer. Cancer's cellular mutiplication does not result in the shortening of telomerase.

Once this is established, I believe it's easy to see the picture: Hashirama, at some point, developed a technique similar to Tsunade's Creation Rebirth, which would encourage cell division, though much like his contemporary's version, it also stumbled into limited usage frequency due to shortening of lifespan.

Solution? Simple, turn yourself into a walking-talking-breathing freaking mass of Cancer. There you go, near limitless chakra, instantaneous healing, hair growth (lol), you name it, it's got it. Hashirama was likely unable to die of old age, also... His body would no longer age.

While this development makes Kazuku's rearrangement of his body look like child's play, it obviously comes with a big freaking huge red warning sticker for FORBIDDEN JUTSU on the label, explaining why it wasn't taught to others.

Now, the biggest drawback:

Fast forward a few years. Hashirama's cells were unable to die, and worst... They prove CONTAGIOUS. People actually able to harm the guy probably had enough contact with him to get to the point where they're INFECTED with Hashirama's genetic material.

While this is perhaps a minor setback (aesthetics issues aside, I mean, who wants a random guy's face on your chest?), you have to understand that not only the genetic material actually turns out to be benefic, this was one of the most powerful ninjas ever alive:

You also get added cell regeneration, boosted chakra levels, access to the rare Wood Release (woot), AND Senju DNA on the deal.

This was likely a Major oversight on the part of Hashirama... He probably never expected his body to turn into a weird undying flower, nor for it to be infectious. Oh well, deal with it.

So there you, ladies and gentleman... Use Hashirama's cells... Get cancer. This explains how come everyone owns a piece of the 1st Hokage, by now.
 

Shouten

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One does not simply adopt scientific facts to anime.

Unless, the author is a scientist/doctor himself :)
 

Satsujinki

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One does not simply adopt scientific facts to anime.

Unless, the author is a scientist/doctor himself :)

While I could agree with this, considering the manga does propose itself to include a little scientific information, and this is widely available information (especially on the subject of cancer), I'd go with this being as scientific as pressure points. :)
 
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