It all began last summer.
Me and my friends went to the beach in a small car.
I went to the bar to get some snacks and drinks when an older man with a surfboard approached me.
I was thinking to myself ''why would you even bring a surfboard to a beach with no waves..?'' but I said nothing.
He told me ''get a haircut you damn hippy'' and gave me a letter with some money in it.
I used that money to get a pina colada instead, those things are quite expensive.
When I came back to my friends and gave them their snacks and drinks
I gave my girlfriend a red vase with a rose in it and said ''happy anniversary'' but she didn't respond to me, instead she kept on tweeting.
I become mad at her and throw my fries on her and it lands in her food, she hasn't even touched it yet.
My phone rings and it's my cousin, he's asking about that money I owed him, I started using an Indian accent to pretend that he dialed the wrong number.
I started to bring out the barbecuing equipment and get the fire started.
When the grill was ready I asked my girlfriend if she brought the stuff to cook, she kept on tweeting and said nothing to me.
I check everyone's stuff and it turns out we have nothing except a turtle, but it's illegal here to eat turtle.
I start screaming at my girlfriend and complaining because she never does anything properly.
A lady in a dress told me to calm down but I smacked her.
My girlfriend still doesn't reply and kept on tweeting.
I decided to leave.
There was a Subway nearby and I decided to get a sandwich.
I remembered that I forgot most of my stuff at the beach.
When I came back my girlfriend was still there and was still tweeting.
I told her I'm sorry and threw a piece of bread on the ground.
She stopped tweeting and ate the bread off the ground.
My girlfriend is a bird.
@bold I have long hair
