Choose Your Adventure 2.0
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Sublime
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Your dream rapidly degrades into decadence, debauchery at it's finest. You direct the women to dig a pit and fill it with petroleum jelly that magically appeared from nowhere. It is a dream after all. One after the other, they strip down into their underwear and plunge into the jelly. Instantly they begin fighting one another, slipping off of each other and falling. Giggles erupt, as do pleas for your hand in marriage.
Before long, you find yourself excessively intrigued and watching intently from above. You could have sworn you just saw some nipples flash, but there is so much going on you can barely focus. As if things weren't bad enough you feel a strange trickle from your nose as it begins bleeding quite excessively. There was no time to worry about that though.
It seemed like hours and hours of fighting in the jelly until one woman was left standing. A voluptuous vixen with her eyes fixated on yours and a stare so intent yet warm it melted your soul like butter. You waste no time plunging into the jelly yourself and making your way to her standing there in the middle. Stepping over the unconscious and half nude bodies of countless women.
You find yourself standing in front of her, you place your hand on her shoulder and begin to loom in for that fateful kiss when suddenly the entire world starts shaking. You open your eyes and find yourself falling from your perch in the tree and the dream world rapidly dissipates and is replaced by reality. As you land on your ass, shooting pains jolt your body bringing your senses around completely.
Three men are surrounding you, obviously the ones who had been there recently, and it appears one of them had kicked the tree you were sleeping in. None of them seem like anything spectacular though, and they ruined your dream. You way your options on how to deal with these men.
Choose now:
A Try to reason with them, they were probably there for a reason.
B These men ruined your dream, slaughter them mercilessly.
C Whatever, you need to get back to the village, just walk off nonchalantly.
Before long, you find yourself excessively intrigued and watching intently from above. You could have sworn you just saw some nipples flash, but there is so much going on you can barely focus. As if things weren't bad enough you feel a strange trickle from your nose as it begins bleeding quite excessively. There was no time to worry about that though.
It seemed like hours and hours of fighting in the jelly until one woman was left standing. A voluptuous vixen with her eyes fixated on yours and a stare so intent yet warm it melted your soul like butter. You waste no time plunging into the jelly yourself and making your way to her standing there in the middle. Stepping over the unconscious and half nude bodies of countless women.
You find yourself standing in front of her, you place your hand on her shoulder and begin to loom in for that fateful kiss when suddenly the entire world starts shaking. You open your eyes and find yourself falling from your perch in the tree and the dream world rapidly dissipates and is replaced by reality. As you land on your ass, shooting pains jolt your body bringing your senses around completely.
Three men are surrounding you, obviously the ones who had been there recently, and it appears one of them had kicked the tree you were sleeping in. None of them seem like anything spectacular though, and they ruined your dream. You way your options on how to deal with these men.
Choose now:
A Try to reason with them, they were probably there for a reason.
B These men ruined your dream, slaughter them mercilessly.
C Whatever, you need to get back to the village, just walk off nonchalantly.
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Sublime
Guest
EtherealBoss
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Sublime
Guest
A vein begins to bulge from your forehead as you slowly come to your senses and look upon these men.
"You ruined my dream."
The men seem dumbfounded momentarily, before one hoists an ax onto his shoulder.
"You were in the tree we were about to ..."
His sentence ended in a disturbing gurgling sound as you lunged forward plunging your kunai into his throat and twisting it. As you begin to turn around the other men looked too shocked to even react. The bandits looked strange in their lumberjack outfits, but that wasn't going to stop you. You leave your kunai in the dead mans neck and lunge at the second closest man and strike him in the face with a closed fist.
"Gah, what's wrong with ..."
Again, you cut his pleas short as you grab his jaw when he's screaming and push down dislocating it, then down even further ripping the lower half of his mouth off. His tongue dangles out as he gasps for air in one of the most disturbing scenes imaginable. Even if he lived, he would never talk again.
The final man had apparently decided to make a run for it. He wouldn't get away, not from a ninja of the likes of you. You grab a kunai and wrap an exploding paper around it and throw it. It makes a single flash through the air as it strikes the main in his spine. You don't even bother to watch the results, you turn around and begin walking off. Death confirmed by a single cry cut short by an explosion.
You're going home now. Nothing in this world will stop you.
Several hours later, you find yourself approaching a road that leads back to the village. You can even see the village gates ahead of you. As you get closer you can see the same two guards that were there when you left. You could have sworn the guards should have rotated out today, but it didn't matter. You were finally home. The guards see you and wave you over.
Choose now:
A) Stop and see what they want, they probably have interesting news!
B) Just wave back, you want to complete your mission and get paid!
C) Shout an insult at them and run by.
"You ruined my dream."
The men seem dumbfounded momentarily, before one hoists an ax onto his shoulder.
"You were in the tree we were about to ..."
His sentence ended in a disturbing gurgling sound as you lunged forward plunging your kunai into his throat and twisting it. As you begin to turn around the other men looked too shocked to even react. The bandits looked strange in their lumberjack outfits, but that wasn't going to stop you. You leave your kunai in the dead mans neck and lunge at the second closest man and strike him in the face with a closed fist.
"Gah, what's wrong with ..."
Again, you cut his pleas short as you grab his jaw when he's screaming and push down dislocating it, then down even further ripping the lower half of his mouth off. His tongue dangles out as he gasps for air in one of the most disturbing scenes imaginable. Even if he lived, he would never talk again.
The final man had apparently decided to make a run for it. He wouldn't get away, not from a ninja of the likes of you. You grab a kunai and wrap an exploding paper around it and throw it. It makes a single flash through the air as it strikes the main in his spine. You don't even bother to watch the results, you turn around and begin walking off. Death confirmed by a single cry cut short by an explosion.
You're going home now. Nothing in this world will stop you.
Several hours later, you find yourself approaching a road that leads back to the village. You can even see the village gates ahead of you. As you get closer you can see the same two guards that were there when you left. You could have sworn the guards should have rotated out today, but it didn't matter. You were finally home. The guards see you and wave you over.
Choose now:
A) Stop and see what they want, they probably have interesting news!
B) Just wave back, you want to complete your mission and get paid!
C) Shout an insult at them and run by.
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Sublime
Guest
;D
Hey, I haven't voted once! And he's still theoretically a badass, just a mentally handicapped one.
I still can't believe you guys decided to slaughter those lumberjacks!
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