Before Midnight [one-shot]

[FitzChivalry Farseer]

Uchiha Itachi, that is my name. That is my clans name to whom my entire life I have stayed loyal. Except for tonight. Once darkness blankets over the land I will throw away any allegiance to that name.


They are now the enemy. They are a menace to the security of the leaf. They have threatened innocent children and folks alike. They have kindled the embers of war when peace is needed. They would dare threaten a good intended establishment that our forefathers worked so hard to build. I will not sit idly by as they destroy the peace of the village.

Now I in turn will become a menace to the Uchiha. I now will threaten their peace and tranquility. I will ignite an unseen war in their very doorsteps. A war that noone will be able to hear nor be able to defend themselves from. Noone will survive my onslaught. Not women. Not husbands. Not children.Nothing less than the complete eradication of the Uchiha will I achieve true peace for the leaf village.

Hate for the Uchiha seethes through my veins and courses around my body.The same hate that fills my eyes with blood and has already determined my cursed path of exile and darkness. If there is such a thing as a God then he would find it wise to strike me down at this instant because at midnight I will unleash death and suffering.Pain is a momentary feeling but what Im about to do will be written in stone for all of history to see and to know who is to blame for the fall of the Uchiha. Time with its cruel advancement pushes me torwards my fate and the destruction of others. Ironic that an Uchiha not a Senju would cause the demise of the Uchiha. However I will not entirely extinguish that flame. I will preserve a spark of light that will one day bring back my clans former glory by ultimately killing me. I long for that day but until then Ill be protecting that spark from those that would blot it out. As for now, the time has finally marked midnight and I could no longer wait in the shadows.

Please forgive me Sasuke

 

[0jordinio0]

Quite a few spelling mistakes, not to mention numerous grammatical and punctuation mistakes also.

And a first person POV like this should have been more paced out, and posted in Italics.

 

[Hypemaster]

Quite a few spelling mistakes, not to mention numerous grammatical and punctuation mistakes also.

And a first person POV like this should have been more paced out, and posted in Italics.

You're a teacher, aren't ya?

 

[0jordinio0]

Uchiha Itachi, that is the name I was christened with at my birth. That is my clans name to whom my entire life I have served faithfully and protected. But tonight....that all changes. Once darkness blankets over the land I shall throw away any allegiance to that name.

They are now the enemy. They are a menace to the security of the Hidden Leaf Village. They have threatened innocent children and civilians alike. They have fanned the searing flames of war when peace is all that should be in place. They would dare threaten a good and peaceful place that our forefathers worked so hard to build. I will not sit idly by as they destroy the peace of the village. I will not sit idly by as they destroy the peace that keeps this land alive!

Now I in turn will become the mance of the Uchiha Clan. I now will threaten their peace and tranquility. I will ignite an unseen war in the shadows of their very doorsteps. A war that know one will be able to hear within the confines of their ears, nor react to defend themselves from. Not a single person will survive my onslaught. Not women. Not children, and definitely not the men. From nothing less than the complete eradication of the Uchiha will I achieve true peace for the leaf village.

Hate for the Uchiha Clan as a whole now seethes through my veins and soars around my body.The same hate that fills my eyes with crimson red blood and has already determined my cursed path of both exile and darkness. If there is such a thing as a Kami then they should find it wise to strike me down this very instant, because at midnight I will unleash death and suffering and stain the walls red with blood .Pain is a momentary feeling but what I'm about to do will be written in stone for all of history to see and to know who the slayer of the mighty Uchiha Clan really is. Time with its cruel advancement pushes me towards my fate and the destruction of others. Ironic that an Uchiha not a Senju would cause the demise of the once mighty Clan.

.....However I will not entirely extinguish that flame. I will preserve a spark of light that will one day bring back my now past families former glory by ultimately killing me. I long for that day but until then I shall be protecting that spark from those that would blot it out.

As for now, the clock has finally marked midnight and I can no longer await my fate in the shadows of the night.

..........Please forgive me Sasuke..........


Just a slight edit, I don't really have time to flesh it out more I'm rather busy.

 

[0jordinio0]

You're a teacher, aren't ya?

No, I'm a writer. Who's currently studying for an English Mastery.

 

[FitzChivalry Farseer]

Quite a few spelling mistakes, not to mention numerous grammatical and punctuation mistakes also.

And a first person POV like this should have been more paced out, and posted in Italics.

Agreed, an android phone is not the best tool for writing fanfics lol bear with me

 

[FitzChivalry Farseer]

Uchiha Itachi, that is the name I was christened with at my birth. That is my clans name to whom my entire life I have served faithfully and protected. But tonight....that all changes. Once darkness blankets over the land I shall throw away any allegiance to that name.

They are now the enemy. They are a menace to the security of the Hidden Leaf Village. They have threatened innocent children and civilians alike. They have fanned the searing flames of war when peace is all that should be in place. They would dare threaten a good and peaceful place that our forefathers worked so hard to build. I will not sit idly by as they destroy the peace of the village. I will not sit idly by as they destroy the peace that keeps this land alive!

Now I in turn will become the mance of the Uchiha Clan. I now will threaten their peace and tranquility. I will ignite an unseen war in the shadows of their very doorsteps. A war that know one will be able to hear within the confines of their ears, nor react to defend themselves from. Not a single person will survive my onslaught. Not women. Not children, and definitely not the men. From nothing less than the complete eradication of the Uchiha will I achieve true peace for the leaf village.

Hate for the Uchiha Clan as a whole now seethes through my veins and soars around my body.The same hate that fills my eyes with crimson red blood and has already determined my cursed path of both exile and darkness. If there is such a thing as a Kami then they should find it wise to strike me down this very instant, because at midnight I will unleash death and suffering and stain the walls red with blood .Pain is a momentary feeling but what I'm about to do will be written in stone for all of history to see and to know who the slayer of the mighty Uchiha Clan really is. Time with its cruel advancement pushes me towards my fate and the destruction of others. Ironic that an Uchiha not a Senju would cause the demise of the once mighty Clan.

.....However I will not entirely extinguish that flame. I will preserve a spark of light that will one day bring back my now past families former glory by ultimately killing me. I long for that day but until then I shall be protecting that spark from those that would blot it out.

As for now, the clock has finally marked midnight and I can no longer await my fate in the shadows of the night.

..........Please forgive me Sasuke..........


Just a slight edit, I don't really have time to flesh it out more I'm rather busy.

You might be able to word it better but im the one who came up with it. If you dont like my stuff then say you dont like it not try to redo it. You can try to make it your own and maybe even go to another site and call it your own but im the one who made it

 

[0jordinio0]

You might be able to word it better but im the one who came up with it. If you dont like my stuff then say you dont like it not try to redo it. You can try to make it your own and maybe even go to another site and call it your own but im the one who made it

When did I ever claim I wrote it? or that it was my own piece of writing? It's like 250 words long, anything I write has 7.5k-10k words long chapters sometimes more. 250 words ain't worth claiming. I only beta'd it slightly for you, you ungrateful litle tosser.

 

[FitzChivalry Farseer]

When did I ever claim I wrote it? or that it was my own piece of writing? It's like 250 words long, anything I write has 7.5k-10k words long chapters sometimes more. 250 words ain't worth claiming. I only beta'd it slightly for you, you ungrateful litle tosser.

Why should I be grateful? When I see someone else mess with my thoughts it just infuriates me. You as a writer should understand how it feels

 

[0jordinio0]

Well then, don't post such crap and expect not to be criticized for it. And If I wanted to, I could copy+paste whatever you wrote and post it somewhere else claiming it as mine. You have not rights to it after all, it's a naruto fanfiction. Get over yourself you little arrogant twit.

 

[FitzChivalry Farseer]

Well then, don't post such crap and expect not to be criticized for it. And If I wanted to, I could copy+paste whatever you wrote and post it somewhere else claiming it as mine. You have not rights to it after all, it's a naruto fanfiction. Get over yourself you little arrogant twit.

Arrogant?! Coming from the guy that rewrote my tiny story so as to satisfy his need for punctuality. I neither asked for your help nor did I want it. Ill get better in my own way whenever I want to progress. As for putting my stuff somewhere else in another site ha you can have it.

 

[Jack Spicer]

Jesus, what's happening here?

Well then, don't post such crap and expect not to be criticized for it. And If I wanted to, I could copy+paste whatever you wrote and post it somewhere else claiming it as mine. You have not rights to it after all, it's a naruto fanfiction. Get over yourself you little arrogant twit.

What you did was insulting. Criticize all you want, but respect the author. Give him some positives with the negatives and don't ever take his work and post an improved version to make yourself happy/take him down a notch unless he asks you.

Arrogant?! Coming from the guy that rewrote my tiny story so as to satisfy his need for punctuality. I neither asked for your help nor did I want it. Ill get better in my own way whenever I want to progress. As for putting my stuff somewhere else in another site ha you can have it.

And you jumped the gun a little fast. What he did was wrong, but you reacted in a wrong manner. Take advice. He wasn't the best at going at it, but all you had to say was "Thanks for the advice" and move on. You did correctly in your first reply by saying "not the best thing to write on lol" and that was a cool reply, but instead you ruined that with your second reply. Keep a cool head. Both of you.

On topic, I like it, but not a lot. I'm not an Itachi fan, so it doesn't appeal to me, but it's not a bad piece. It's a good little letter, what it was meant to be and I really like the last paragraph a lot.

Anyways, both of you, be more friendly next time.

 

[FitzChivalry Farseer]

Jesus, what's happening here?


What you did was insulting. Criticize all you want, but respect the author. Give him some positives with the negatives and don't ever take his work and post an improved version to make yourself happy/take him down a notch unless he asks you.


And you jumped the gun a little fast. What he did was wrong, but you reacted in a wrong manner. Take advice. He wasn't the best at going at it, but all you had to say was "Thanks for the advice" and move on. You did correctly in your first reply by saying "not the best thing to write on lol" and that was a cool reply, but instead you ruined that with your second reply. Keep a cool head. Both of you.

On topic, I like it, but not a lot. I'm not an Itachi fan, so it doesn't appeal to me, but it's not a bad piece. It's a good little letter, what it was meant to be and I really like the last paragraph a lot.

Anyways, both of you, be more friendly next time.

Well he started it

lol nah but I guess in the end we both really did keep our heads. well since neither of us negative repped each other.

Thanks Spicer for the thoughtful feedback and Im glad that you at least liked this small piece of mine. Hopefully I can keep on bring out more material and keep getting better. Btw I never thought you would finally change your avatarO_O

 

[Jack Spicer]

Well he started it

lol nah but I guess in the end we both really did keep our heads. well since neither of us negative repped each other.

Thanks Spicer for the thoughtful feedback and Im glad that you at least liked this small piece of mine. Hopefully I can keep on bring out more material and keep getting better. Btw I never thought you would finally change your avatarO_O

That's good and no problem. I'll keep an eye out for more.

I never did either and sorta wanted to change back after getting this one initially, but once I changed, I changed. Feels odd going back.