Advice Would Be Greatly Appreciated

Should I try to date her now, later, or don't bother?


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TheSyren

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Good afternoon/evening/morning to all of you who view this post. I need some relationship advice, and what better place to get it then from my peers, which of course is all of you from NB. Here is my dilemma:

A friend of mine, who I have had a thing for for a while, has just recently became single. We have many things in common, or at least we will since I can "change my skin" pretty easily, and I want to try for the first date. Usually, there wouldn't be a problem except for the fact that she is, well, pregnant. Like, 18 weeks pregnant. The ex wants nothing to do with her or the child and is a totally worthless sack of flesh, and probably won't be a problem in the future. She is worth the trouble and I truly don't mind raising a kid that isn't mine. I may be only nineteen, but I know I can support her with my finances. So my question is: should I try now, wait till later, or don't even bother?
 

Οdin

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Don't do it... she's pregnant. ( >_>)
 

Wakizashi

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that's too much baggage. i say don't deal with it. if so then i see drama in your future.
 

-Shiro-

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if u think its worth it then go for it but wait cause im just going off what u seild but she just broke up with someone
 

TheSyren

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I truly don't mind raising the child, since uh... Can't really give her one... Kind of sterile at the moment due to some of my medication that I have to take for a certain condition.
 

kenzi

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You're only 19 though. Do you really think you're going to be able to handle a kid at that age?
 

-Punk-

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oko before this thread get close ..... xd .

dont bother bro ... it's not easy racing kids , why bother with one that is not even yours ....... & dont get offended but the girl is not worth it either ..... believe it ..... this dilemma will only bring you pain .. & you know what nagato said * pain only brings hatred xd jk


but dont bother .. Lord Labian out
 

cptenn94

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well if you really like her and think shes the one, then go for it....just make sure that you do it in a way that doesnt capitalize by kinda useing her, make sure she knows you are sincere and truly feel the way you do about her....so if she is the one you love, then i would start making moves now because she has to be upset, and you being there would help make her feel much better....

but it is up to you....keep in mind that if you decide to make the move, that you need to make sure you are faithful, and that this isnt temporary....and just consider that it will be a choice that will affect the rest of your life.....but as said before if you love her and you think shes the one then just go ahead and make your move.....


ill pray for you to make the right decision, and i hope all works out for you......if you ever need to talk or ask more questions ill be there to help, just message me......hope my advice is helpful

edit: what did you mean by " change your skin" just curious?
 
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TheSyren

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You're only 19 though. Do you really think you're going to be able to handle a kid at that age?

Yes. I would love to have a child right now, even if it isn't of my blood.
 

FitzChivalry Farseer

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Lol stop smokking cannibis. Ok dude if you want her just to you know then don't raise the child bro. If you truly love her enough.to spend the rest of your life paying for a kid that isn't even yours then go right ahead. Oh and dude the babys father will always be a huge factor in her decision making no matter what even to some stuff that you don't know. He is not gonna leave her alone just like that so just don't get your hopes up with this girl.

If all else fails you can rasengan the shit out of the babys father though
 

TheSyren

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well if you really like her and think shes the one, then go for it....just make sure that you do it in a way that doesnt capitalize by kinda useing her, make sure she knows you are sincere and truly feel the way you do about her....so if she is the one you love, then i would start making moves now because she has to be upset, and you being there would help make her feel much better....

but it is up to you....keep in mind that if you decide to make the move, that you need to make sure you are faithful, and that this isnt temporary....and just consider that it will be a choice that will affect the rest of your life.....but as said before if you love her and you think shes the one then just go ahead and make your move.....


ill pray for you to make the right decision, and i hope all works out for you......if you ever need to talk or ask more questions ill be there to help, just message me......hope my advice is helpful

edit: what did you mean by " change your skin" just curious?

The "change skin" part would refer to the skills of a chameleon. I guess you could say I am easily adaptable to a relationship.
 

soyeongun

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What the **** is wrong with her ex?!
As for your question, I can't really give you advice on what you should do.
But I think you deserve a better girl.
 

AnimeIsPerfection

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If it's only "a thing" you have for her, then wait until you are sure you really love her and are willing to care for her. Raising a child is going to be tough so make sure you are up for it. Also, if you do decide to go for it, do. not. back. down. Once you commit to her, you need to stay with her because she wont have anyone else to lean on. If you break up with her after everything she went through, youd be almost as bad as her ex.
 

cptenn94

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The "change skin" part would refer to the skills of a chameleon. I guess you could say I am easily adaptable to a relationship.

ok... i have read what you have posted since first post and have something else to say....make sure that you know her well, first before you date, so you know what you are getting into. if you already know and think she is worth the rest of your life(if she likes you as well)
simply she is open and you love her and want to be with her for the rest of your life go for it....your old enough to make the choice, and it would seem that you would be a good responsible person....but make sure that you are prepared to be committed....as it would be better for her to be with a guy that will stick with her than for a guy who just stays for a while then leaves(although you dont seem that way)

i would wait a little bit longer, or until you are sure that the father is really out of her life, and leaving her(and not a temporary breakup kinda thing)

but make sure that she knows you are there for her, at least as a friend and continue to support her....again wish you the best of luck
 

TheSyren

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Thanks, I will probably need all the luck I can get.
 

Shirohebi

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Well, this one is complicated. You don't mind to take care of a child who isn't yours and i get that because of the fact you're kinda sterile due to your meds. I get that, really. But the main things here are two:
1- you said you only have 'a thing' for her. She's pregnant, bro. if you someday don't feel that 'thing' anymore, she'll be f****d, so wait to be sure about your feelings, the soon-to-come kid has no fault.
2- Your 'change-my-skin' ability. You should be yourself and not pretending you're someone else in order to get into someone else's undies. Be yourself and be sure that she loves you back and isn't only looking for your 'finances'. Oro out.
 

TheSyren

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You guys are great, thank you for your opinions. I think I know what I will do.
 

Senpai1507

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If you ever do it,it's waste of life.You will regret it one day.If she's 18 and is pregnat she's bad.Don't bother.
 

kuvhlubkoj

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dont even bother. You have a lot of time left in your life, you are still young. Go out and explore life. Don't commit yourself yet, the world is a big place.

There are some things you have to think about, first of all, a girl who gives herself to a guy who abandoned her after being impregnated is definitely a red flag. Granted, not all girls are like that, but you want a girl who can make better decisions in life.

Second, don't be someone's back-up b*tch. Don't be a backup, you are better than that. If she didn't want you back then, she wont fully want you now. You are just a backup, and trust me you dont want to be a backup if you want a serious relationship.

And lastly, there are TONS and tons of girls out there. Trust me on this, i'm not saying it just because. There will ALWAYS be a girl out there that you like. However, the hard part is waiting for that right one, there are a lot of bad tasting fishes that you have to weed out to find the good tasting fishes, which are rare.

Dont make it a big deal, just relax and go on with your life, the right girl will come. If you are still stuck on that girl, then wait till it's the right time to approach her. Take things slow. IMO i dont think it's the right time to approach her right now.

Go out and do your own things man, everything will fall into place naturally.
 
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