Friend(s) with benefits

ccm30

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So like, hi,

so uhm, a friend of mine totally treats me with indifference, as she totally doesn't make a move on me with the "wanna be friends with benafits", and I don't know if I should make the first move, as we've been friends longer than any of her other "friends" (with benefits lol), I find her to be smexy as I am, just that I think she sees me more of a family-type person... (as she's known me for like, 5-or-7-years),

So, I ask: what would you do, and or any advice...?

She teases me by sitting on my lap playfully at times--just that tho--playfully; nothing suggesting... (like a sister or someone would do ><), I'd nosebleed if I were in a anime lol,

She's got a pet name for me "birdy", (I'd much rather foxy tho) *covers whiskers sheepishly*

Edit: forgot to add...

I think she only gives benefits to those that can do favors for her... Such as A. drive her places; B. boot liquor for her, smokes for her, etc...

Now I would be O.K. doing such for her, but I don't drive either, and aproove of either substances... (but am would be okay with providing if it meant being treated more "equally" as her other "friends") ._.
 
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Nathan

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So like, hi,

so uhm, a friend of mine totally treats me with indifference, as she totally doesn't make a move on me with the "wanna be friends with benafits", and I don't know if I should make the first move, as we've been friends longer than any of her other "friends" (with benefits lol), I find her to be smexy as I am, just that I think she sees me more of a family-type person... (as she's known me for like, 5-or-7-years),

So, I ask: what would you do, and or any advice...?

She teases me by sitting on my lap playfully at times--just that tho--playfully; nothing suggesting... (like a sister or someone would do ><), I'd nosebleed if I were in a anime lol,

She's got a pet name for me "birdy", (I'd much rather foxy tho) *covers whiskers sheepishly*

Maybe, she would consider it 'weird' since your are pretty much blood to her? and she doesn't want to stuff that up.

Edit: forgot to add...

I think she only gives benefits to those that can do favors for her... Such as A. drive her places; B. boot liquor for her, smokes for her, etc...


Now I would be O.K. doing such for her, but I don't drive either, and aproove of either substances... (but am would be okay with providing if it meant being treated more "equally" as her other "friends") ._.


If she treats you different because, they buy her sh*t/takes her places etc. Then she is a using b*tch.
 
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Finn

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Sounds like a complete ***** to be honest with you...
 

ccm30

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Maybe, she would consider it 'weird' since your are pretty much blood to her? and she doesn't want to stuff that up..

Well, I can't argue facts... ('bout the using part lol), though about the blood mention:

would one that's known her longer be more secure with treating said person/persons with more concern...? (versus someone that someone's only known for weeks/months for example)

Now normally if I only knew said person for a shorter period of time - I'd be okay writing her off as a time expense, but since there's history... (I'm sure thers here would agree on the history > *reason here*), doesn't history trump judging others...? (judging is an example)

Also, (if it means anything) I used to be best-friends with her brother... so that no doubt plays a role in the matter... Wither or not said role is important is another matter. xD
 
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Cassiopeia

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wouldn't you be risking losing her friendship in the long run? after a while things may become weird and then a fall out would happen. I think it better to find "greener grass" :shrug:

 

Nathan

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Well, I can't argue facts... ('bout the using part lol), though about the blood mention:

would one that's known her longer be more secure with treating said person/persons with more concern...? (versus someone that someone's only known for weeks/months for example)

Now normally if I only knew said person for a shorter period of time - I'd be okay writing her off as a time expense, but since there's history... (I'm sure thers here would agree on the history > *reason here*), doesn't history trump judging others...? (judging is an example)

The said person, knowing you for lets say 4 years, there may be some emotional attachment, compared to someone, you've only known for a few weeks. So if they lose you over the "friends with benefits" thing, since you may want to take it to the next level (relationship) and it may hurt you both then you originally planned. Then you stop, seeing each other and you wish the whole "friends with benefits" happened.

Maybe one other reason, why she goes for people she hasn't known for long, is because there isn't emotional attachment between her and them, so if shit happens, she may only loose, that person driving her place/buying crap for her.

Also, (if it means anything) I used to be best-friends with her brother... so that no doubt plays a role in the matter... Wither or not said role is important is another matter. xD

Yeah "used" to be. Something must of happened to change that. It could, befriending her siblings for what purpose though?
 

Uchiha Riyo

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wth?

I don't think you should go into this, if you've known her for a long time, then risking that bond would screw you over. Don't bite off more than you can chew "foxy". You could find yourself lifting more weight than you can handle. Unless you were only friends with her because you wanted to be friends with benefits at the start, then I suppose having a sexually beneficial bond wouldn't be the worst thing you can do.
 

ccm30

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Yeah "used" to be. Something must of happened to change that. It could, befriending her siblings for what purpose though?

Well, see, he totally moved away, and I've also moved away; we've not visited each other in years... We used to live right beside each other... (she used to visit frequintly; even tho she had lived 10 miles in the other direction)

prolly like the Hidden Sand to the Hidden Leaf distance...:shrug:

Edit:

wth?

I don't think you should go into this, if you've known her for a long time, then risking that bond would screw you over. Don't bite off more than you can chew "foxy". You could find yourself lifting more weight than you can handle. Unless you were only friends with her because you wanted to be friends with benefits at the start, then I suppose having a sexually beneficial bond wouldn't be the worst thing you can do.
It's been so long I honestly can't recall... (Wish I knew either way; now it feels like a guessing game xD) but yes, I've always crushed on her on some level.. She seemed a tad to young for my "interests", but once she admitting her other benefit friend,s (coupled with sleeping with one of my best friends at the time) things started peeking my attention again...

Made me feel like everyone was having a drink (booze optional) and I wasn't having a sip at the table... (if you get my meaning)

and yes, all views are most welcomed; this is helping me make a dissension (either way) :3
 
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MidKnight

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OP, Dont do it. Dont risk losing a true freind just because you want to be "freinds" with benifits (**** buddies) instead.
 
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Well it all comes down to this:
Is she really worth all the trouble?
IS she really fun to hang out with as a friend?
And is being in a relation ship with her worth it?

Then again, if she friendzoned you, its over, there is no going back XD
 
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lswhyte123

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Sounds like a complete ***** to be honest with you...

Nailed it friend.

She is in fact a ***** if she is having *** with people who can do things for her in turn. It essentially becomes about acquisition.

Prostitution is having *** with someone and then receiving some form of payment. Doesn't need to be financial.

 
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Jack Spicer

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I agree. Sounds like a ***** or a prostitute. Doing things for favors.
 
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Friends with benefits NEVER work out. someones emotions get thrown in and they usually dont end well. and why would you want to have that with someone who sounds like a *****(sorry not meaning to upset you just calling it as i see it).
 
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Tree Guru

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Don't do it for two reasons.

A. Ruin a friendship.
B. she sounds like a stereotypical user.
 

ccm30

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OP, Dont do it. Dont risk losing a true freind just because you want to be "freinds" with benifits (**** buddies) instead.

Aw, alright Mizukage... (gotta listen to a Kage; cagey bastards xD)

But yes... I won't speak to her directly about it; even tho I did mention the "all my friends are having a drink from the bar" thing... (not to be confused with the saying "if everyone was jumping off a cliff" quote...)

And yes; so we established she's a ***** (or prostituting herself out lol) tho that part was common knowledge right...? (well; this is besides the point either way xD)

So, who is against her making the first move -- should one take said opportunity ...? (let's put said ***** judgment aside for this curiosity lol)
 
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NO,NO,NO dont do it unless you want it to RUIN your friendship. if you dont care about your friendship then do it.
and friends with benefits is the same as F*** buddies. just different wording that all.
 

lswhyte123

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Aw, alright Mizukage... (gotta listen to a Kage; cagey bastards xD)

But yes... I won't speak to her directly about it; even tho I did mention the "all my friends are having a drink from the bar" thing... (not to be confused with the saying "if everyone was jumping off a cliff" quote...)

And yes; so we established she's a ***** (or prostituting herself out lol) tho that part was common knowledge right...? (well; this is besides the point either way xD)

So, who is against her making the first move -- should one take said opportunity ...? (let's put said ***** judgment aside for this curiosity lol)

if she makes a move and you both actually wanna do it then, get ready for some hot scissoring and for the friendship side of things to be over...
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