I Don't Care Enough

[kimb]

I'm often been accused of not caring,even though I care a lot.

I'm speaking of this definition: feel concern or interest; attach importance to something. I am guessing that people are speaking about "how" I care as opposed to "if" I care. Because I do attach importance to things, all the time. I feel concern & take interest. That is caring. But, I suppose I do not know how to "show" people that I care.

Here is a typical situation for me...
Other person: I have a problem.
Me: Tell me about it.
Other person: (tells me their problem)
Me: Let me think about this for a bit.
Other person: (weeps about problem)
Me: (furiously thinking of a solution to their problem so they will stop crying)
Other person: What am I going to do about this problem?
Me: (tell them the most logical way to actually solve their problem)
Other person: You just don't care about me! Can't you feel sorry for me or at least give me a hug?
Me: (dying a little inside):|

I guess in some ways, I feel sorry for someone when they're dealing with a problem, but usually I am just wondering why they are just crying about it and telling everyone who will listen instead of trying to solve the problem. This also happens when people are speaking of other things, like war, violence, natural disasters, etc. My reaction to these things just isn't "caring" enough. People call me cold. It's not like I do not care about these things. I process the information I receive and think about situation, but rarely do I have an outward emotional reaction.

I guess I am just curious if any of you have similar issues with people thinking you just don't care (and possibly being angry with you about it). Most of my relationships have ended because I just don't "care" enough. But I do care, and often, I care a whole lot. Any thoughts?

 

[Gintõki1]

The less you give a ****, the happier you'll be.

^ best way to live.

 

[90sKids98]

If people can't understand that you care even though you suck at showing it, then you have no reason to bother with that person

 

[Venomous Cobra]

You just don't care about me! Can't you feel sorry for me or at least give me a hug?

Lmao what? It's because you associate yourself with those type of people.

OT: If you care that much then simply fake the concerns:eww:

 

[kimb]

Lmao what? It's because you associate yourself with those type of people.

OT: If you care that much then simply fake the concerns:eww:

I gave up on faking concerns a long time ago. My fake reactions were really transparent and I just end up making myself and the other person feel really awkward. But you might have a point about associating myself with the wrong type of people.

 

[Joon]

I had the same problem.

You figure out that people have already found their solution. All you do is listen and nod, and tell them everything is going to get better.

 

[hypocritical]

You basically just described me there. Only difference is that I really don't give 'the' ****.

 

[Lonegamer]

I am like aged dark knight returns batman in this regard

I punch people so hard that their bones break but I know it won't kill them, but plebs who don't scream "OMG you'll kill him" and when I see them being punched with bone breakers I think "That won't kill you, perhaps it'll be a good lesson" and they scream "Why you no care?!!?" At one point I just gave up, plebs are plebs for a reason.

But let me tell you something, people will save others not because they want them to be happy, but because they want to be hero, they will help poor not because they want them to have better life, but because they want to be the saviour.

People will cry not because they want problems solved, but because they want attention and all that ******ry.

That's how plebs work, they want one thing they scream for other, and other morons understand, but the truly superior don't.
And they're not worth real care, because they can't give it.

These days I sit back and watch the world burn.

 

[Kishi Uzumaki]

well even i look like a cold , careless asshat mostly though i care about people silently and only people that knows it are people I'm close to and we are problem solvers man most people wants their feelings to be understood and a listening ear .

 

[Legendary Saiyan]

Depends on who you converse with tbh

 

[Inch]

people dont want you to save them, they just want you to listen to them and sympathize with them
lmao

 

[Jazzy Stardust]

everyone is not the same, thats what creates a lot of good and a lot of bad in the world. but you dont care enough, thats just how you are. you can either accept it, or try to work on it if you dont want to be that way

---

also this is just my opinion and you posted this thread...but yeah, reading that OP i can see you could be more empathetic. like you dont even care enough to tell them your sorry to hear something bad happened to them, people are giving you tips like "say something, or give me them a hug" and its still not clicking, theyre literally telling you how to react

but usually I am just wondering why they are just crying about it and telling everyone who will listen instead of trying to solve the problem.

now remember everyone's is different and we all have things to learn, i myself need to learn to not expect so much out of other people. but i dont see how you cant grasp this concept, i mean you read shonen by your avi. im sure youve heard that people fell better when they express their issues, i mean why do you think art is so powerful?

you have to realize that for a lot of people this is part of solving the problem they have. feedback can also help how they think about something, you standing there not saying anything, from there perspective does seem like you dont care, or that you dont want to be bothered. if you dont express yourself theyll never know you and misjudge you