Espadara Uchiha
Jōnin Strategist 🧠
- Joined
- Apr 2, 2014
- Messages
- 1,180
- Reaction score
- 154
This is for -Immortal-.
Alright ****ers. Imma tell you why Orochimaru is hot shit.
1: Oro is a ****ing mixture of Voldemort, Michael Jackson, and Dr.House. He'll kill your family, rape you, than tell you that you have AIDS in the span of five seconds.
2: Kusanagi Blade. This shit cuts through anything, even Jiraiya's rock hard ****, and Oro doesn't even have to ****ing touch it. He must be a Jedi or some shit, cause this blade will fly at you like a ****ing Kamikaze.
3: Snakes. Yeah, snakes. You know how kinky snakes can be? He can tie you up, hold you down with a few of these babies. Not to mention that they work as ****ing baggies for him. Need a scroll? Mother****ing Snake. Need aforementioned Kusanagi Blade? Snake comes out of his mouth, Sword comes out of snake. Wanna watch someone take a shower? ****ing camera on snake, bro.
4: He killed Hiruzen. ***** you guys hype Hiruzen up so much that means Orochimaru is ****ing Russel Crowe tier now. Oro went in like a ****ing boss, and while he lost his hands, he basically made Hiruzen his ****ing ***** throughout the whole thing.
5: Immortality, ***** **** ******. He gets AIDS? Goes in someone else's body. He even made his ****ing subordinates into checkpoints for him. Oh, Oro finally got killed and sealed within Totsuka Blade? Lol Comes out of Anko's neck. Where's your soloking now, you little ****? And even if you cut his current body in half, not a friend in sight, he just spits himself out a new ****ing body.
6: FOught without his arms for like, most of the ****ing series. Fought Tsunade and Jiraiya to a standstill. With no hands. Fought against Four Tail Naruto and was messing with him the entire ****ing time. Sasuke had to wait for this mofo to be on his deathbed befoe he tried to start shit.
7: Raped more ***** and butts than anyone else. Lets list them,
ALL OF TEAM SEVEN: Raped Sakura in Forest of Death, TOuched NAruto inappropitatley, raped Sasuke during Timeskip after giving him a hickey, and made Kakashi his *****.
Jiraiya: ***** tried to stop him from leaving, Oro beat the shit out of him.
Tsunade: ***** tried to beat the shit out of him, he raped her.
EVERYONE in Sound: Academy Exam is to get stuck in a closet with Oro for five minutes.
8:Smartest person in ****ing Verse. Made a plan to **** over Konoha, one of the strongest villages, and ****ing succeeded in killing their Kage. Managed to give a baby a powerful bloodline. Sure he only got One out of sixty, but have you ever tried to inject something into a child and have them survive? Didnt think so, I'm still at 0 out of 239
9: Best pedo ever. ***** made his entire village out of young children. Offering power ****ing works as a get in my van line, apparently.
Boom. Oro ficking wreckts everyone.
Alright ****ers. Imma tell you why Orochimaru is hot shit.
1: Oro is a ****ing mixture of Voldemort, Michael Jackson, and Dr.House. He'll kill your family, rape you, than tell you that you have AIDS in the span of five seconds.
2: Kusanagi Blade. This shit cuts through anything, even Jiraiya's rock hard ****, and Oro doesn't even have to ****ing touch it. He must be a Jedi or some shit, cause this blade will fly at you like a ****ing Kamikaze.
3: Snakes. Yeah, snakes. You know how kinky snakes can be? He can tie you up, hold you down with a few of these babies. Not to mention that they work as ****ing baggies for him. Need a scroll? Mother****ing Snake. Need aforementioned Kusanagi Blade? Snake comes out of his mouth, Sword comes out of snake. Wanna watch someone take a shower? ****ing camera on snake, bro.
4: He killed Hiruzen. ***** you guys hype Hiruzen up so much that means Orochimaru is ****ing Russel Crowe tier now. Oro went in like a ****ing boss, and while he lost his hands, he basically made Hiruzen his ****ing ***** throughout the whole thing.
5: Immortality, ***** **** ******. He gets AIDS? Goes in someone else's body. He even made his ****ing subordinates into checkpoints for him. Oh, Oro finally got killed and sealed within Totsuka Blade? Lol Comes out of Anko's neck. Where's your soloking now, you little ****? And even if you cut his current body in half, not a friend in sight, he just spits himself out a new ****ing body.
6: FOught without his arms for like, most of the ****ing series. Fought Tsunade and Jiraiya to a standstill. With no hands. Fought against Four Tail Naruto and was messing with him the entire ****ing time. Sasuke had to wait for this mofo to be on his deathbed befoe he tried to start shit.
7: Raped more ***** and butts than anyone else. Lets list them,
ALL OF TEAM SEVEN: Raped Sakura in Forest of Death, TOuched NAruto inappropitatley, raped Sasuke during Timeskip after giving him a hickey, and made Kakashi his *****.
Jiraiya: ***** tried to stop him from leaving, Oro beat the shit out of him.
Tsunade: ***** tried to beat the shit out of him, he raped her.
EVERYONE in Sound: Academy Exam is to get stuck in a closet with Oro for five minutes.
8:Smartest person in ****ing Verse. Made a plan to **** over Konoha, one of the strongest villages, and ****ing succeeded in killing their Kage. Managed to give a baby a powerful bloodline. Sure he only got One out of sixty, but have you ever tried to inject something into a child and have them survive? Didnt think so, I'm still at 0 out of 239
9: Best pedo ever. ***** made his entire village out of young children. Offering power ****ing works as a get in my van line, apparently.
Boom. Oro ficking wreckts everyone.
