Relationship Advice ! :S

SmittenKitten

Member
Joined
Jan 11, 2013
Messages
211
Reaction score
40
Recently, my boyfriend and i have been going through something really strange.
We have a long distance relationship and we usually only see each other 2x a month . My boyfriend has a full time job and he now goes to school 4 days a week. So , we rely heavily on communication.
Well, for some reason he now rarely calls ( he used to call me everyday after or before school) and he never replies to my texts( we never really texted anyways but still) . We've been going out for 3 years and never had any problems until this.
I've been trying to keep the communication without trying to be annoying or over baring so i would text or call him once a day . He hardly replied . When he did he wouldn't really talk a lot ..
Last time i saw him, i tried asking he if he was mad at me or if i did something but he said no . I also said we need to talk to each other more but it's been 2 weeks since then and nothing changed.
I don't even try to text him anymore because all my patience is gone and frankly i'm angry at him . I'm probably going to break up with him .. But a small part of me wants to keep on trying..
Also, one of my friends thinks my boyfriend is going through something and is just isolating himself due to depression . (I don't really know what to think about this ) What should i do ?
 

Chibiusa

Sannin of the Scrolls 📜
Elite
Joined
Jan 29, 2013
Messages
7,829
Reaction score
1,128
I only read half of this but....break up with him -_- seriously

It sounds like since he started school he met someone there or something. Just don't try anymore. Everything you said is just...just breakup with him, okay
 

Big Sean

Banned
Joined
Feb 4, 2013
Messages
342
Reaction score
52
Damn..this is how long distance relationships usually end up. I really hate to be the guy, but yeah; it was bound to happen.

You gotta end it.. sorry.
 

Sefirosu Masamune

Jōnin Strategist 🧠
Veteran
Joined
Mar 30, 2013
Messages
2,372
Reaction score
335
Damn..this is how long distance relationships usually end up. I really hate to be the guy, but yeah; it was bound to happen.

You gotta end it.. sorry.

I only read half of this but....break up with him -_- seriously

It sounds like since he started school he met someone there or something. Just don't try anymore. Everything you said is just...just breakup with him, okay


Yeah. idk how busy you are you make time for your girl. maybe you guys just need a break. maybe ending it does not have to be permanent, but now is not a good time for a relationship if time cannot be made for it to prosper
 

SmittenKitten

Member
Joined
Jan 11, 2013
Messages
211
Reaction score
40
Don't apologize for being honest .
I prefer honesty over anything else. Yea i will break up with him .
Thanks for your opinions. ^ ^
 

-Punk-

Member
Joined
Aug 23, 2012
Messages
35,343
Reaction score
3,840
Well two things might be going on , either he met someone else or he's having some ppersonal problems like the friend said . Maybe give him space a bit or talk to him one more time & ask him what's going on ?
 

Fermion

Jōnin Strategist 🧠
Regular
Joined
Feb 24, 2013
Messages
1,196
Reaction score
113
Well Relationships should'nt be one sided.U are trying ur best to keep up.I think this guy was a really lucky one who has got such a commited GF.U are a treasured one.But the problem is most ppl start to ignore those who generously luv them with the course of time and also start to lose their intrest in them.They start to ignore their responsbilties in a relationship which eventually leads to breakup.I think his luv for u was just for the sake of not being single which slowly weared out with time and long distances.U should not be inclined towards him that much that a breakup leads u into depression.The truth is he does'nt deserves ur love.And u should also accept it....
talk clearly to him about the future of ur relationship.If he is really in some kind of depression then u must have known till now with his way of talking or reacting.
As ur relationship has been a long one I think u should one more chance to him.Talk to him directly and clearly.If he really luvs u and just has been a little careless maybe he will realize ur importance in his life and tries to be more commited toward u.But makeup ur mindset to deal with the worst outcome.....Cheers and have a nice day...
 

Rorasa

Kage in the Making 👑
Legendary
Joined
Mar 11, 2012
Messages
11,147
Reaction score
678
I think you should try talking with him one last time. try to explain to him that if he is going through some problem that you want to be there for him but at the same time you don't want to drag the relationship if he is not into it anymore. if he really doesn't have some kind of problem then its best to break up.
 

The Fourth

Member
Joined
Mar 5, 2009
Messages
330
Reaction score
32
I think you should try talking with him one last time. try to explain to him that if he is going through some problem that you want to be there for him but at the same time you don't want to drag the relationship if he is not into it anymore. if he really doesn't have some kind of problem then its best to break up.

This - My gf lives in California (I'm in UK), If I'm lucky i get to see her twice a year. Communication is really important, we've been through rough patches a lot of times and come close to breaking up in the past, its communication which has fixed it every time. Just got to be open and honest with each other.
 

Machiko

Jōnin Strategist 🧠
Regular
Joined
Jan 8, 2013
Messages
1,367
Reaction score
209
If you two haven't had any contact in 2 weeks and he hasn't even gone through as much trouble as you have to keep in contact, then I'm sorry to say this but you should really break up with hm. Even if he's having problems, if he loves you he really should have enough trust in you to tell you what's up.
 

Scooby Doo

Legendary Shinobi 🐸
Immortal
Joined
May 10, 2012
Messages
45,490
Reaction score
1,676
I wouldn't ask for relationship advice on NB...
 

Zetsuen

Leaf Village Regular 🍃
Regular
Joined
Dec 1, 2011
Messages
738
Reaction score
42
Oh this problem.

Well don't jump to the conclusion that he is seeing someone else. That's always the retarded thing to do. Always.

Instead, try and make your way to meet up with him. See how he is, he could be just depressed. Be comforting; he probably appreciate that. Remember, that's what relationships are for. But if he's hostile to you, then and only then can you just give up on him.

It's so annoying when a women/girl gets annoyed for not receiving replies. It makes them seem self-centred.
 

BazzBee

Kage in the Making 👑
Legendary
Joined
Mar 11, 2013
Messages
14,587
Reaction score
1,222
Break up find another hot guy date him friend him boyfriend him have personal time with him and marry hi have kids and live happily ever after
 

Wang

Banned
Elite
Joined
May 17, 2012
Messages
5,807
Reaction score
587
Don't worry, I'm here & I'm a relationship expert!

I'm actually familiar with the move he's pulling & I've even used it myself. He's grown tired of you & he kinda wants to breakup, but because of the long-term nature of your relationship he doesn't want to be the bad guy, so he's pushing you away hoping that you'll get annoyed & dump him, basically making you into the bad guy.

Now here's the question: Is he doing it completely consciously or is it actually subconscious? If he's generally a p*ssy about things I would assume he's doing it on purpose, meaning he doesn't have the balls to dump you. But if he's a pretty normal dude & just going through some situational depression then he may not be completely aware of it. When you're with him a few times each month you should be able to figure out which it is based on his behavior.

My advice: Breakup with him, it's the prefect test for this situation. If he's pushing you away on purpose he won't make any effort to get you back. If he's not aware he's doing it, this will snap him out of it & he'll fight for you. Basically, if you dump him & he doesn't fight to get you back then it's over anyway & it's time for you to move on. As a side note, I doubt he's cheating because he'd make an effort to communicate better for cover up purposes.

#trustwang
 

Husky

Jōnin Strategist 🧠
Regular
Joined
May 3, 2012
Messages
1,610
Reaction score
140
Hmmm...not my style to give advice to the enemy, but seeing as I have a heavy heart, I'll help. Normally for me, this means one of two things. He's cheating on you, or he plans on ending the relationship. Being separated for such a long stretch of time is probably one of the reasons why you're seeing your relationship fall apart. I mean, there are some that can manage, but those are the exceptions rather then the norm. Him being a guy, one of the major reasons for guys wanting to break up (besides being attracted to a new female) is perceived infidelity on a females part. Try to communicate with him again and clarify any loose ends. It'll be difficult because dudes don't exactly express a lot of emotions. If that doesn't work, might be time to move on.
 
Last edited:
Y

YokoKurama

Guest
Long distance relationships are tough. They are also a no no in my book. He could be going through something, or he has found someone else and is too much of a coward to break up with you. I wold try one more time to have a heart felt conversation with him. If he still refuses to talk then tell him it is over. You are only causing yourself unnecessary stress. I know that you have been together for a long time but you should try to find someone you can physically see and spend time with anytime you can. It's better for you physically and mentally I think. It will be hard but something has to give. I wish the best for you though.
 
Top